I Am An Illegitimate Child With A Legitimate Reason For Revenge-Chapter 217: Ariel had scars

Jane asked,

"You know, if he suddenly asks you to marry him not because he wants to be Rachael’s official father but because he likes ’you’, will you marry him?"

"I haven’t thought of him like ’me’." Alexa answered. "I feel he sees his dead wife in me. So his feelings," she shook her head. "They are not directed at me."

"Anyway, will you marry him?" Jane pressed on, looking a bit serious and excited the same time.

This was a bit suspicious. She didn’t know why Jane was pressing on with this matter so much. It didn’t matter if he suddenly started liking her because she was a look alike, the feelings he had for Ariel would still remain and thus, the probability of him asking her to marry him were low.

He would feel like he was betraying Ariel. He would never forgive himself for it. So many things could go wrong if that thought happened to cross his mind.

Even now, him smiling so warmly at her would probably make him review his actions as harsh.

Those were the thoughts that corroded him on a daily basis and she tried to break him out of those thoughts. She wasn’t sure if she had succeeded but if she did, and was using the face of his dead wife to her advantage, then she was vile.

She pursed her lips, not knowing what to think anymore.

But why did he start treating her like this in the first place? He used to treat her normally even when he looked at her.

Was it the scars? This all seemed to have started after he saw her scars and talked to her.

’Ariel had scars’

She remembered the butler telling her that Ariel was not a girl born with laughs and smiles. She suffered as much as Raymond did and had all sorts of scars over her body.

Did the scars on her back give her one more similarity to Ariel? Was that why he changed the way he was treating her?

Her gaze fell and she pursed her lips even tighter.

Was it really right for her to take his feelings as they were, knowing they originally belonged to Ariel? Was it really right that she used the similarities she had with her like this?

She squeezed her hands together.

Now, she was the one feeling guilty.

"Hm? Why did you suddenly turn quiet?" Jane asked and approached her. "I only asked just to know your thoughts. You don’t have to think too deeply about it."

She saw the discomfort on Alexa’s face and turned awkward. Maybe she shouldn’t have mentioned that?

The door opened and Rachael ran in with the cardboard in her hand.

"Mummy, I want you and daddy to see this." She said, looking very excited but Alexa could not return that same excitement.

She tried to smile at her daughter but her smile was not coming out the way it should and it made her look like she was in pain.

"Mummy, are you alright?" Rachael asked, noticing it and she nodded.

"I’m fine, I just-" she shook her head and looked up to see Raymond walking in.

She really shouldn’t but she couldn’t stop herself from liking him. It was very wrong of her but she couldn’t help it.

There was this feeling inside her that yearned for him and she didn’t know if it was her personal desire but she was feeling miserable.

’Will it be possible for him to forget her and just like me... for me? Will his feelings ever be directed towards me?’ she thought and shook her head, feeling she was thinking rubbish again.

"Mummy." Rachael called and Alexa brought down her gaze.

She slowly touched Rachael’s hair while trying not to scatter the nicely done hairstyle.

’I feel like a bad mother. My daughter’s right in front of me yet all I can think about is if this man likes me.’

She tried once more and this time, she was able to smile well.

"I’m fine, baby. Just a bit tired."

"Then mummy, can I show you and daddy my cardboard now? It’s a drawing I made..." she blushed, feeling flustered. "When you were asleep. I really wanted to show you and daddy at the same time so I kept it safe."

Alexa could only imagine what was in the cardboard and the moment Rachael opened it, her eyes widened in surprise.

Rachael had drawn, with her little crayons, a very nice drawing of Raymond, Alexa and herself. It was not a silly matchstick drawing like one would imagine.

For someone so small, it was a very skilled drawing.

But that wasn’t what was important, it was the fact that she drew all three of them as a family.

Alexa’s eyes suddenly grew teary and she looked away.

Why was she crying?

"Mummy?"

"I’m fine." Alexa said. "It’s so beautiful that I was moved to tears. You’re so talented, Rachael." She added but couldn’t keep herself calm and eventually, the tears rolled down her cheeks and she cried.

Raymond was stunned speechless. He couldn’t figure out why she was crying.

"Are you in pain, by chance?" He asked and she looked at him.

Yes, she was in pain. She was in pain at the fact that she was using this kind man’s vulnerability to her advantage. It was because of her face and her scars, if not, he would definitely not treat her this well.

The drawing that portrayed a happy family was far from what they were. They were not even a family, not to talk of a happy one.

If only she could keep her heart in order and say it clearly that he should move on.

His inability to move on was what was keeping him hooked to the image of his late wife. He was seeing her in Alexa and that was why he was treating her so well now.

Those were her thoughts and it was actually painful.

It was painful knowing that no matter how much her feelings for him grow, he would never love her the way she loved him.

"Please, just... just give me a moment." she pleaded for the time to compose herself. She could only wonder how her daughter was feeling seeing her mother cry like that.

But she wasn’t a good mother. She couldn’t even get her emotions in check. Best psychologist? What a joke she was.

"Mummy." Rachael held her hand, bringing her back from her reprimanding thoughts. "Does it hurt that much?" She asked in her childlike innocence.

She looked down at her daughter who was genuinely worried and then at Romeo at the side who looked scared. Then, her eyes trailed to Raymond and Jane.

They all looked genuinely worried and here she was worrying about if her feelings would ever be reciprocated. She was truly the worst.

"I’m fine now." She said and wiped her tears with the hanky Jane handed to her. "Right now, I’m a bit tired. You guys can go ahead to the event." She smiled and to Raymond, she added, "I’m not feeling too well. I guess I’ll get on the wheelchair tomorrow. Hope you don’t mind."

"Of course not. But are you sure you’re okay?" Raymond asked with a worried look. His eyes were unsteady and it appeared like he had seen a ghost.

"I’m fine." She managed to say and they all went out.

Once they were gone, she looked at her hands and once again saw the void. In this life, where exactly was her position?

She covered her face and shrunk in her bed.

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Okay, I started a new book

CHASING THE VENGEFUL VILLAINOUS HEIRESS

Don’t forget to check it out.