365 Days To Love-Chapter 142 - ONE HUNDRED AND FOURTHY -TWO:You Are Not A Murderer,Bella Brown!
"Dad,you are back"Mary said cheerfully, as her dad pecked her cheeks,ruffling her hair while his eyes were busy scanning the room for Isabella.
Mary knew who he was looking for, because she had asked her dad how his trip went but the man was so worried about his new wife that he didn’t even know he was conversing with his daughter.
He was back earlier than she expected,which wasn’t what he always did whenever he travelled,but now things have changed.
He was back early for his woman, something which he has never done for her mom.
Stop being such a hypocrite Mary!
She cautioned herself,when she failed to keep to her word after much thought yesterday night to let her dad and his new wife be.
Her stepmother was not what she thought she would be,she had actually thought the woman would turn her dad against her and try to get everything for herself.
But seeing her yesterday,while she was trying to kill herself through drinking, made her know that she was hurt,and it’s definitely not about her dad.
It was something else that had nothing to do with her dad,and she was really curious to know what it was about.
Yeah,she had given up on having any revenge on the woman,but she still wanted to know what secrets she was keeping.
Does her dad know that his new wife tried to kill herself yesterday?
Why won’t he know?
The two were stuck together like glue, and she knew there were no secrets the two would keep away from each other since they were so much in love with each other,that it oppresses her to the core.
She couldn’t boast of having any boyfriend right now at the moment,the only one which she could think of as a means to get into the Knights family,Nathan,was a total jerk and a mannerless asshole.
Her life was really not the best to talk about right now,which she intends to fix but doesn’t know how to go about.
Seeing her dad and her stepmother like this was enough motivation for her to search for what she truly intends to have.
Happiness.
She wants to feel what couples had between them, although she has ruined her many chances of having that due to her nasty behaviour.
"She wanted to drink herself to death yesterday"Maty found herself exposing her stepmother to her dad which she didn’t know why she did that,but the fact was that she intends to build her relationship with the both of them.
"Shit!’’James exclaimed,rushing out to their room even before Mary could ask if he had lunch.
He pushed the door open without knocking,the worst case scenario at what she might be doing crossed his mind after hearing from Mary,what she did yesterday.
She had switched her phone off, after seeing him off at the airport before going to the orphanage which he had insisted he cancels his travel and go with her,but she had adamantly refused.
He didn’t need anyone to tell him that things didn’t go well, after he saw her staring outside through the window a solemn look on her face.
She didn’t notice that someone was in the room with her,what exactly could have gone wrong yesterday?
Whatever it was,he wasn’t planning on letting her go through this alone,he was here for her and that includes sharing her painful memories with her.
"You are back quite early"Isabella said, still looking outside without glancing back to make sure it was who she thought was in the room that was here.
But it seems she had grown attached to him to know exactly his scent and everything, because she didn’t need anyone to tell her that someone else was here with her and it was no one else but James.
She owed him an explanation for making him worried yesterday,but she wasn’t in the mood to talk about anything at the moment,she didn’t think she would ever be in the mood to talk to anyone anymore.
There was no will to live,what use was it to live when everything she had worked so hard for, was in vain?
What use was it talking to anyone about her present predicament?It was not going to change the fact that she killed her child.
Nothing could ever change that,and there’s nothing she’s ever going to do or anyone do to make her forget.
She had written down the date in her diary,the worst day of her life. She had actually thought that the years of Antonio’s betrayal was her worst day,but yesterday made everything openly to her.
"I had to"Jane said,throwing his suitcase on top of the bed,still standing at her back while ransacking his brain at how he was going to open up this conversation with her.
He had known her too well up to this extent,that she was in a silent mood and didn’t want to be disturbed.
While he wouldn’t be a participant to her request,she was scaring the shit out of him with her behavior and he didn’t want her to be like this.
"Because i was worried throughout last night for your inability not to pick up my calls’ ’He said walking over to place his hands on her shoulder,his heart squeezing tightly when he saw the tears running down her face which he didn’t notice earlier.
James tried turning her over to hug her,but she didn’t bulge one bit,shaking her head in denial without looking at him.
"Don’t.. please"She pleaded,"I don’t want you to look at me like that,it hurts"She said,her head hanging low.
But knowing who James was exactly,he paid no heed to her request, because he turned her to face him, which she did this time,but she was still looking down.
"Bella"He called,his right hand moving forward towards her jaw,but her hand covered his.
"Please,I don’t want you to look at me like that,I don’t want the pity,I de..serve ittt"She cried.
"I insist,it’s going to be okay bella,don’t blame yourself"James tried assuring her,but that seemed to add more to her frustration, because she pushed him.
"No! Don’t tell me that!’’She yelled, clutching her hair, disarranging it more"Don’t try to reassure me that it’s okay,it’s not okay!it can never be okay!’’She yelled more.
"Okay I’m sorry,but you have to calm down. ’’James apologized,tugging his tie loose while approaching her to hold her arms,this time she looked at his face.
The dark circles hanging under her eyes, made it known to him that she didn’t sleep a wink last night,he regretted leaving her side yesterday for some foolish business seal which wasn’t worth it anyway.
Nothing was worth Bella.
He wondered if she took her drugs this morning,but seeing her like this was enough reason to know that taking her drugs was far from her mind.
What exactly happened to her child?
"It hurt James,it hurts’ ’She whispered,as his eyes watered seeing her like this,he pushed her to his chest patting her hair,while whispering assuring words to calm her down but it wasn’t easy.
"I know,I’m sorry"He said,Bella had suffered greatly throughout the years of her being apart from her children.
No matter how strong she looked,her antidepressant drugs were what kept her incheck for years from completely losing her mind.
Judging from what she was going through now,he doesn’t know when exactly this phase would be over,but he prays it doesn’t last long and she doesn’t so anything harmful like committing suicide.
She had tried that before,overdosing on drugs which he was lucky to come home early that night to take her to the hospital before things went downhill.
If there was anything that he could do,to make her forget everything he would have tried that, because honestly speaking,she was losing herself too in this revenge on her husband.
Coupled with the fact that she had suddenly gone gaga,nothing was going to stop her from killing Antonio,he knew that and she intended to keep it that way even after he had tried changing her mind.
If only he could take away her pain,and carry it himself he would have done that.
"I’m a murderer"He heard her say,as she cried more in his chest.
"No, you are not"He adamantly said, pulling her away from,holding her gaze in his."you are not a murderer,Bella Brown"he said looking into her eyes hoping it works.
"I..she’s ..she’s dead James,I.. killed.."She stuttered.
"Bella!’’He yelled,shocking her as she flinched from his voice. This was the first time she was seeing him like this.
"You didn’t kill her, Antonio did, remember that okay?"He uttered,more like hypnotizing her to believe him,and saw something shiver in her eyes as she nodded instantly at his words.
"I didn’t kill her"She mumbled to herself"Antonio killed my baby"She said as James smiled,hugging her as she kept on repeating what he said.
But he wasn’t happy,it was only for this moment, because as much as he tried to make her forget each time she lost control.
It always comes back,much stronger than the last to make her life a living hell.
Her nightmare has come to stay.
Which was no one other than Antonio Sinclair.
James was scared.
Really scared.
If the two eventually meet,how sure is he that she would come out without losing her mind completely.
She went for her daughter today,the next time would be her son.
Then,the last but not the least,her husband, Antonio.
The worst husband of the year.
