I Was Not Meant To Exist

A mass of black mist writhed across the ceiling of a room, flashes of lightning accompanying just how bleak the atmosphere was.

A cold wind blew beneath the black mist, and that cold wind struck a massive black stone that stood firmly in the center of the room.

On one side of that black stone, a man was forced to sit leaning against it. The cold spread through his body, which wore no clothing. Black veins protruded all over his body up to his neck. Both of his hands were embedded into the cold black stone, while both of his legs stretched straight out over the floor that was flooded with cold black water.

The man’s head was lowered, staring downward, his eyes tightly shut.

A warm touch reached his body that kept twitching because of the black veins. That warm touch trembled as it felt how cold the man’s body was.

The man began to lift his head and looked at the person who owned that warm touch.

His eyes slowly opened. The whites of his eyes, which should have been white, had now turned black, while his golden irises looked dull.

The man looked at the person touching him with that warm touch—she was an adult woman with straight black hair. Her black eyes reflected the man’s face, her pale lips trembled uncontrollably, her white dress was slightly wet, and the bones on her thin body protruded.

Her voice slowly became audible, a voice that made the man’s ears twitch—a voice that his ears had not heard for a long time.

"Thomas... thomas...."

Thomas’s brows furrowed, he gritted his teeth, he could not bear to look at his wife’s face.

His gaze shifted elsewhere as if he did not want his wife to see him. Thomas’s golden eyes reflected Mira’s back, who sat with her back facing them.

Her long black hair fell down to her waist, the white coat she wore was slightly wet at its ends. Mira sat while bending her knees, her face buried into both of her knees, her golden eyes only staring blankly without focus.

The sound of thunder rumbled from the black mist writhing above them, and the cold wind accompanied it, piercing their skin.

Mira slightly lifted her head, her warm breath collided with the cold air.

She, who had been silent from the beginning, now started to open her mouth, her voice sounded hoarse and tired.

"Did father make a contract with a demon?...."

There was no answer from any human voice after Mira’s question, only the sound of thunder from above.

Thomas, who was lost in thought, could not answer. His lips tried to move to produce a sound but he still could not answer, while Thomas’s wife could only swallow her saliva as she looked at her husband.

A pain spread across Mira’s forehead as she realized her father did not answer her question. She held her forehead with one of her hands.

Her pale lips trembled without her realizing it.

"What have father done with demons?...."

Mira squeezed her forehead, her eyes were closed, unable to endure the pain that appeared in her head.

"....Was father involved in all the chaos that happened recently?."

Mira’s body trembled, now she held her head with both of her hands, her breathing became irregular.

Her mind unconsciously reminded Mira again about the chaos she saw when the city of Osteria Academy was attacked.

"Did father kill all those people? Was father the one behind all of that?...."

Tears unconsciously flowed out from Mira’s closed eyes, nausea also followed it, causing Mira to lose control over her body.

Her heart beat fast, an indescribable pain was carved in her heart, her breathing felt choked, her mouth opened several times to help her breathe.

"ANSWER, FATHER!! WAS IT FATHER WHO DID ALL OF THAT?!"

Mira turned her body, now her face, which was filled with tears, looked at her father who was trapped in the black stone.

Mira’s heart felt like it was being sliced when she saw her father’s condition that felt unfamiliar to her, the salty taste of tears was unconsciously felt on her lips.

"WHY?! WHY DID FATHER DO ALL OF THAT?!"

Mira hit her chest repeatedly, her voice competed with her crying, her mother covered her mouth when she saw Mira like that.

"Did father not trust me?! Did father not trust me to save mother?!"

One of Mira’s hands pointed at herself, while her other hand squeezed the cold black water that soaked her clothes.

"I tried every day, I learned every day, I failed every day...."

Mira’s voice almost disappeared in the middle of her crying, but she kept forcing it out until her voice reached the ceiling covered with black mist.

"BUT FATHER INSTEAD ALLIED WITH DEMONS?! FATHER INSTEAD ALLIED WITH THE SOURCE OF OUR MISFORTUNE!!"

Mira’s words pierced her mother’s ears, her lips trembled, tears also came out from between her eyelids, she looked at Mira who was broken, her voice sounded firm amidst the cold wind.

"Stop it, Mira!! You cannot blame everything on your father!"

Mira’s expression turned stiff, her teeth trembled as she was shouted at by her mother, she shook her head while pointing at her father who was just silent.

"FATHER KILLED PEOPLE, MOM!! HE ALLIED WITH DEMONS!!"

Mira’s mother could only freeze upon hearing her daughter shouting, her hands trembled uncontrollably, she knew all the bad things that happened stemmed from her.

Mira’s golden eyes looked at her father, her gaze was very different from the gaze she used to look at her father.

"Why did father do that?! The father I know would not do that..."

Mira’s voice kept echoing in Thomas’s ears, a voice that kept asking the reason why he did what he regretted.

"WHY, FATHER?!..."

Thomas’s ears felt hot from continuously hearing Mira’s questions, his heart beat fast, his cold body now began to heat up.

"....ANSWER, FATHER!!!" Thomas’s brows twitched, he gritted his teeth, his mouth that had been tightly closed now began to open, his blackened eyeballs and his golden irises began to look at Mira.

"THAT IS BECAUSE OF YOU!!" Thomas’s shout made Mira and his wife fall silent, while Thomas’s golden irises trembled, he tried to convey what he had been keeping to himself all this time, even though his body could not endure it.

"What do you think I felt when I saw you just standing frozen watching your friends joke around with their mothers?!..."

Thomas’s body moved as if he wanted to break free from the black stone that held him.

"....my heart hurt!! My heart hurt, Mira...."

Tears came out from Thomas’s blackened eyes, he lowered his head looking at his body that was now filled with black veins.

"I could not replace your mother’s role, Mira..."

Thomas’s wife also cried when she heard what Thomas revealed, she leaned her face on Thomas’s cold shoulder.

Meanwhile Mira could only stay silent looking at them, she still felt tightness in her chest but she held it so it would not come out, her lips trembled violently.

"Father tried to bring mother back? But father also killed other people’s mothers?!... father killed many people!! In the end they felt what I felt!"

Mira clenched her heart, her teeth collided strongly against each other.

"Why did father not trust me? I tried every day!!..."

Thomas shook his head, tears still coming out from his blackened eyes.

"How long more do we have to wait?! Your mother’s body has reached its limit!..."

Thomas’s body trembled violently, his expression turned into a grimace, his tears that came out seemed endless.

"...I ALSO MISS MY WIFE!!" Thomas’s heart became lighter after saying the words that he had held back all this time, he could finally share those words with someone other than himself.

Thomas’s face lowered, while his wife wrapped her arms around Thomas’s neck, warmth and cold fought when their bodies touched.

Thomas’s voice sounded soft, but it was heard clearly in his wife’s and Mira’s ears.

"I miss my wife."

Mira could only stare blankly at her father and mother, the suffocating feeling in her chest still had not disappeared but she held it so it would not come out.

She only whispered to herself, but she made her voice reach her father.

"That still does not justify father’s actions. In the end I was the one who managed to heal mother. Not father who allied with the source of our problems."

Silence once again enveloped them, Mira turned her back again on her father, she only stared at the black ceiling formed by the black mist.

For a few moments nothing strange happened, but suddenly a small tremor struck that place, the black ceiling formed from the black mist slowly writhed more violently and became closer to the ground.

Mira’s golden eyes saw that, she swallowed her saliva nervously.

’The sky is slowly collapsing....’

A scream was heard in Mira’s ears, Thomas’s trapped body began to convulse uncontrollably.

Mira only saw all of that from afar, she only shook her head.

Her father’s voice sounded faintly in her ears but she did not listen to it further.

Mira only lowered her head and grabbed her own hair, her thoughts kept racing so she could get out of that place.

She kept spacing out until something disturbed her thoughts, the cold black water beneath their feet suddenly moved, that black water slowly rose little by little.

Mira’s golden eyes widened, she kept trying to make sure of it until a black lightning struck not far from her.

Mira’s heart beat fast, she covered both of her ears while closing her eyes, without realizing a voice came out from her mouth.

"Mother!!...."

Her mother who heard Mira’s scream immediately told her to come closer, Mira immediately stood up and ran there, she saw and felt it herself, the black water that pooled slowly rose, she also looked at the ceiling, lightning became bolder to appear and the black mist slowly writhed downward.

When she arrived near her father and mother, she saw her mother who was looking at her father, while her father tried to do something even though he was restrained by the black stone.

Even though Mira argued with her father before, her heart still hurt seeing her father fallen, black veins had now reached his entire face, and slowly the black veins on his body began to spread covering his skin.

Mira’s mother looked at Mira who was looking at her father, Mira’s golden eyes trembled, her tears were almost falling without her realizing it.

Meanwhile Thomas kept trying to do something to get his wife and child out of that place, but there was nothing he could do, his body trembled violently, tears slowly fell into the pool of black water that kept rising, now that black water had almost covered Thomas’s waist as he sat.

’I failed.... I failed to protect my family.’

Thomas slowly closed his eyes, he felt regret over everything he had done.

The cold black water kept rising, the black mist kept descending with its lightning, and the three of them were like ants ready to disappear at any time.

Thomas’s closed brows slowly twitched, as he closed his eyes a small golden light appeared, that light penetrated his closed eyelids, that light slowly gave a calming warmth.

Slowly Thomas opened his eyes, his body trembled violently, he saw with his own eyes, a golden light shone on his face coming from the edge of the place they were in.

Slowly that golden light that was originally just a line began to spread into two lines, three lines, four lines, and so on.

That golden light dazzled the dark room, the cold black water that had been rising now stopped, while the black mist in the sky seemed to oppose that golden light.

The three of them looked at that golden light, and at the place where that golden light came out, a crack could be seen, a crack that kept getting bigger as the golden light came out.

When that crack shattered, a hand could be seen coming out, a hand that shone gold with golden dust surrounding it.

The three of them could only stare at that golden hand, warmth spread across their cold skin.

That golden glowing hand moved, a shout was heard reaching them.

"HEIII!!!.....MIRAAA!!!..."

Mira’s ears twitched, her heart beat fast, the hairs on her neck stood up.

"Alex?..." she recognized the voice calling her name, but she still stood frozen.

Another shout was heard from that golden glowing hand.

"MIRA!!!....IF YOU HEAR ME, QUICKLY GRAB MY HAND, I CAN’T HOLD ON ANY LONGER, DAMN IT!!!...."

Tears fell from Mira’s golden eyes, her body trembled uncontrollably when she heard the voice of someone who should not have been there.

Her father who saw Mira immediately shouted.

"That is holy energy, Mira... you can get out of here!!"

Mira shifted her gaze to her father who was still restrained by the black stone.

Her father’s lips trembled, their eyes met each other.

"Go and take your mother.... forgive me for bringing you to this disgusting place, forgive me for disappointing you, Mira..."

Mira’s breath caught, she looked at her mother who was now also crying, bitterness spread across her tongue.

"We are leaving... father."

Mira’s left hand immediately grabbed her mother’s right hand, she pulled her toward the golden light where Alex’s hand was.

At first her mother resisted, but after she looked at her husband’s face, she let her body be pulled by Mira toward the golden light.

Thomas’s golden eyes watched his child and wife move away, relief spread through his heart mixed with bitterness, he lowered his head while the golden light still illuminated the room.

Mira’s mother who shifted her gaze away from her husband felt dazzled by the golden light that became brighter as she approached it.

She saw the silhouette of Mira’s back illuminated by the golden light, that light distracted her vision, she felt as if she was seeing again memories she had long passed.

Mira’s back now shrank to become smaller, her mother even looked down, Mira’s hand that was holding hers also became small like she remembered before.

Mira’s mother’s ears rang, she heard again a voice she had not heard for a long time.

"Quick mom!... come on... or that ice cream cart will leave..."

Tears unintentionally slipped from Mira’s mother’s eyes, she blinked once and when she opened them again, Mira’s back had become bigger again, a faint smile formed on her face, and a whisper escaped from her lips.

"You have grown, Mira..."

Mira did not hear her mother’s whisper, while her mother’s ears rang again, she heard the sound of footsteps running following them.

Her heart pounded fast just from hearing those footsteps, Mira’s mother slowly turned her head back.

Her eyes widened, her mouth even slightly opened when she saw someone chasing after them.

In the reflection of Mira’s mother’s eyes she saw Thomas running after them, the white robe he wore kept swaying with each step, his golden eyes showed warmth, his black hair was neatly combed back, while his smile made anyone who saw it feel calm, his voice was even heard in her ears.

"Hey!... why are you leaving father?... wait for father!!"

Mira’s mother blinked after hearing Thomas’s voice, when she opened her eyes again, the figure of Thomas running had disappeared, now what she saw was Thomas who was restrained by the black stone, his entire body now covered with black veins, his black hair now messy, and his golden eyes were not visible because he lowered his head.

Instantly Mira’s mother’s world felt empty.

Their steps stopped, Mira immediately grabbed Alex’s hand with her right hand, but the grip in her left hand slipped.

Mira immediately turned her head back toward her mother, she tried to reach her mother’s hand again.

"Mother... come on!!"

But her mother only stood still looking at Mira, a faint smile suddenly formed on her face, tears dripped from her eyes creating a clear contrast.

"Forgive mother, Mira..."

Mira’s golden eyes widened, her heart felt like it was about to fall hearing what her mother said.

Her mother’s expression turned into a grimace, tears fell more and more decorating her face.

"...mother cannot leave half of mother’s heart in a place like this alone..."

Mira’s expression turned blank, tears flowed without her realizing it, meanwhile Alex’s hand kept pulling her away from her mother.

Mira held Alex’s hand, she tried to release his grip, but she could not, her voice sounded choked.

"Wait... wait... Alex!! Wait!!"

Mira shifted her gaze to her mother, she shook her head.

"Mom... you have to come with me, I cannot be alone, mom..."

Mira’s body was now being pulled away leaving her mother behind, her left hand kept trying to reach her mother.

Her mother smiled faintly, the sound of her crying was painful.

"...you must live happily, Mira, you are the other half of mother’s heart."

Mira’s crying broke out hearing her mother’s words, she kept trying to release Alex’s grip, but she was pulled even more, her vision slowly turned white, the last thing she saw was her mother crying while looking at her, and her whisper was heard.

"You are our little hope, Mira. Forgive your father and mother..."

Everything turned white as her mother’s whisper reached Mira, while her mother who saw Mira leave with the golden light only stood still for a while.

She turned her body shortly after and walked toward Thomas, her steps became harder because the black water now rose faster, she walked under the lightning that appeared more frequently.

Finally her steps reached Thomas.

Thomas lifted his face, he saw his wife’s face smiling.

Thomas opened his mouth but before his voice came out, his wife hugged him first, that hug warmed both of them.

Tears kept falling from Thomas’s eyes, his tears soaked his wife’s shoulder.

"Forgive me, Rose.... forgive me."

Rose did not answer Thomas’s words, she only hugged Thomas tighter.

And slowly the black mist reached them and enveloped them both.

—

In the middle of the hall illuminated by golden light, cold sweat dripped from Alex’s forehead, his hand that pierced Thomas’s heart finally grasped something.

That grasp kept resisting but in the end he forced it out from Thomas’s body that was slowly crumbling.

When Alex’s hand that shone gold was pulled out, Mira followed it out from Thomas’s body.

Alex swallowed hard, his heart felt relieved, he could see his friend again.

Alex’s sacred energy slowly disappeared, he fell onto his back while Mira fell on top of him, still holding his hand.

A punch was felt on Alex’s chest, his brows twitched, he wanted to shout in protest as usual, but something wet spread across his clothes and skin.

Mira’s body trembled, she hit Alex’s body repeatedly, the sound of her crying echoed through the hall.

"I told you to wait.... my mother, my father were still there."

Mira kept hitting Alex’s body, while Alex’s vision began to blur, he gritted his teeth and gently patted Mira’s back before he lost consciousness.

Katarina approached Mira who was crying alone, while the queen only stared at Thomas’s body that had now turned into ash.

She bit her lip unconsciously, a whisper escaped from her.

"...so you also chose to leave, Rose..."