I Pick Up A Bunch Of Attributes - Chapter 26

When you're reborn as Jorah Mormont you ain't got much. A Dad looking to bale and go spend his days hanging out with the guys on the Wall, a wild Aunt raising your wild cousins you can't stand, an arranged marriage to a girl you never met with a dowry almost low enough to be an insult, and a populace of smallfolk so inebriated and incompetent its no wonder nothing's changed around here in 8,000 years. Hopefully the gold finger granted by Levid's Magically Wheel of Reincarnation can help.A really nice pair of testicles.With that, the right attitude, and a shovel I have everything I need to dig a nice grave to lay in.Or Bag End. Let's see which happens first.

I used a cheat to devise a character in a game. Upon regaining consciousness after pressing the play button, I discovered myself embodying the character I had crafted, the ‘Priest of Corruption.’ This character was intentionally created with unfavourable statistics and is widely detested! The sole item in my inventory was the withered hand of a woman, yet could it possibly be the hand of a goddess?

“They Call Guys Like Me a Simp.”(Meanwhile, I’m out here living what their favorite MC only dreams about.)You ever notice how stories glorify the ones who feel nothing?The MC who never laughs.Never feels.Who plays women like chess pieces and calls it intelligence.He manipulates a girl? “He’s strategic.”He never opens up? “He’s mysterious.”He never flinches, never laughs, never lives —And you call that strength?Funny.Because to me?That’s just a prison in disguise.You see an “alpha.”I see a boy too scared to feel anything real.While they spend ten chapters monologuing about logic and sacrifice,I’m already making the Saintess scream,drenched in sin,halo cracked,legs trembling from truths her prayers never taught her.And I didn’t get there with cold eyes or control.I got there with laughter and chill. With warmth. With a grin and a hand on her thigh.I didn’t need to dominate her mind —I freed her heart.But that scares people, doesn’t it?Because readers trust the ones who suffer.Who stay quiet.Who kill without blinking and love without showing it.But me?I flirt.I laugh.I take hits and smile back, bloody and defiant, as if too weak to get angry.I don’t need to pretend emotions are weakness.I weaponize mine.Pleasure. Connection. Laughter.That’s my arsenal.And while your favorite MC is still calculating his next five moves,Trying to outwit death and romance like both are math problems,I’m already balls deep in the jade fairy — her sacred yin furnace clenching like it’s worshipping my shaft, her Dao Echo shattered into breathless moans, and her so-called cultivation path leaking down her thighs while she begs me to break her meridians again.You call that luck?Nah.That’s mastery of the three worlds.Because in a world that respects coldness,I came in hot.Where others manipulate, I connect.Where they posture, I play.Where they sacrifice, I seduce.So go ahead.Call me a simp.But while your genius MC is busy monologuing about destiny,I’m the one making goddesses question theirs —with a smirk, a touch, and no regrets.I’m not the hero.Not the villain.I’m just a simp… the kind who leaves your cold, emotionless MC’s woman dripping, ruined, and too stretched to go back to him.

Introduction:

Wano Country, New Tokyo.

The original soul of Higashino came here and wanted to live a quiet life without being disturbed, but the “Crime Handbook” appeared in his mind by chance. If you catch criminals and bring them to justice, you can get attribute points and random rewards.

What? Can’t do it?

According to the prisoner’s crime star rating, he can enjoy the free distribution of temporary attribute points (Buff) when he is arrested.

The criminals are getting worse and worse!

My Buff gets stronger!

Mysterious fruit of ability, powerful sword type of technique, and various abilities of different sequences and levels, all turned into magical rewards on the [Guild Handbook]…

Metropolitan Police Department: These extrajudicial lunatics are simply insane, vicious, and full of evil…! ! !

Higashinohara:

I mean…

Is there anything worse? !

…

Here is the protagonist’s self-introduction:

My name is Higashinohara, a 16-year-old high school student, unmarried, and I live in the “Academy City” New Tokyo Detective Agency in Ogawa Town, Edogawa District. The police arrested lawbreakers, and they could only go home after eight o’clock in the evening.

When I got home, I would do a handstand exercise for an hour, and taste different brands of canned coffee before going to bed, just to reminisce about some of the subtle differences, just like reminiscing about the criminals who fell in my hands.

Going to bed at eleven o’clock.

Everyone says that my work and rest are very regular and healthy.

But it’s a shame to say,

In my mind lately,

Seems like something weird happened…

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