Happy Little Farmer - Chapter 36: The Secret in the Phone

(R18) “I heard that the dragons are lustful beasts.”‎‎. . .‎

When Yao Shen, Patriarch of the Heavenly Sky Sect, ascends and regains memories of his past life on Planet Earth, he realizes that he can no longer allow himself to accept the cruel and violent ways of Eliria, the realm of cultivation. So he decides to change it. It was time to found a new sect. One based on the values of honor and equality over senseless violence and discrimination. A sect where all, from the mortal farmer’s son to a sect elder's daughter, were held accountable to the same rules. Welcome to the Modern Sect.

Ben was having the worst day of his life—then he died. But instead of moving on to whatever comes next, he woke up in the Wizarding World as Benedict Brown, the alternate male version of Lavender Brown. Which is... concerning, because Lavender Brown did not have a great time during the Second Wizarding War.On the bright side, he’s apparently the Dovahkiin. And he has a Skyrim shop system. So, you know, pros and cons.Can he survive Hogwarts, Death Eaters, and whatever else this world throws at him? Or will he end up as werewolf chow just like Lavender? One thing’s for sure—he’s going to loot everything that isn’t nailed down.

So, I died. Face-planted on my keyboard after a 72-hour coding marathon. Very heroic. My one dying wish? To finally get some sleep.But the twist is : I got isekai'd. But I wasn't reborn as a legendary hero with a harem and a cheat skill. Nope. I'm a rock. A Dungeon Core, to be exact.My new job description is simple: create a terrifying labyrinth, murder heroes, and generally be a menace to society.Yeah, hard pass. That sounds like way too much paperwork. My new life goal is achieving a perfect 100-year nap.Luckily, I found a bug in the System—or maybe it's a feature? My unique “Slumber System” gives me way more XP (they call it Dungeon Points here) when adventurers take a nap than when I, you know, kill them. My assigned fairy guide, FaeLina, is having a non-stop panic attack about this. Apparently, “aggressive coziness” isn't covered in the Dungeon for Dummies handbook.So, I leaned into it. I started building the world's first 5-star dungeon resort, complete with fluffy moss beds that feel like clouds, a tea shop run by a friendly slime waiter, and pillows that hug you back. The place went viral. Knights come for the naps, mages for the therapeutic tea, and bards for the sweet, sweet content.The problem? My five-star reviews are tanking the property values of the 'Blood Pit' dungeon next door. I'm being forced into official Dungeon Tournaments where my ultimate weapon is a lavender-scented fog machine. And the stuffy bigwigs on the Fairy Council are starting to think my little “peaceful revolution” is a threat to their entire “kill-stuff-for-profit” business model.But the more I build, the more I realize this isn't just me being lazy. I'm uncovering an ancient, world-changing secret about why dungeons really exist, and it's a truth the gods themselves tried to bury.My name is Mochi, and my quest is to level up from a sleepy rock to the God of Dreams. My final boss isn't some dragon or demon lord. It's the original God of Combat himself.And I'm going to challenge him to a Nap Off for the fate of all reality.Who knew the path to ultimate power was this comfy?