Wicked Husband-Chapter 85 - 84

Cesare stood motionless in the center of the tavern, the blood-soaked knife heavy in his hand. He had just taken the lives of dozens of men—civilians, a first for him. As the commander-in-chief of the Imperial Army, this was an unprecedented and unforgivable act.

By the laws of the empire, the men in the tavern were technically innocent. No law had been broken by desecrating the body of an executed criminal, regardless of how vile their behavior had been. Yet, the scale of his actions weighed heavily on him.

But Cesare had killed them anyway. He had slit their throats, covered himself in their blood, and yet, the suffocating weight in his chest had not lifted. If anything, the sensation was tighter, like his breath was being squeezed from him.

The girl he had cherished, his most precious Eileen, had been beheaded at the guillotine. Her once-beautiful form, now a macabre display, was nothing more than a grotesque trophy for the twisted amusement of others.

Only after slaughtering dozens of those lecherous b@stards did Cesare finally realize what he truly desired. It wasn’t the Traon Empire he had wanted to protect. His laurel wreath was meant for Eileen and her alone.

But Eileen no longer existed in this world.

The full weight of that truth hit Cesare like a physical blow. The sensation of shattering inside him was more than mere anger; it was an intensity of emotion he had never before experienced.

For someone like Cesare, who had always maintained a near-colorless emotional detachment, this profound agony was unbearable. He looked down at his blood-soaked hands and thought to himself:

’Who must I kill to make this pain stop?’

Yet even his once-brilliant mind could not conjure an answer. All that lay before him was an endless abyss.

"..."

Gradually, Cesare pulled himself out of his muddled memories. He wiped a hand over his face, forcing himself to piece together the fragments of his thoughts. He worked to separate reality from illusion, carefully stitching together his fractured mind.

The rain’s persistent pounding clung to his ears, irritating him like a lingering itch. The urge to cut into himself, whether with a knife, a gun, or anything sharp enough, surged within him.

But this was reality—the world where Eileen still existed. He had already committed one unforgivable act; if he did anything more, Eileen would not be able to endure it.

Suppressing the futile urge, Cesare approached Eileen. She lay on the bed, looking as fragile as ever. Her face was pale, nearly corpse-like. Cesare gazed down at her for a long moment before bending closer, his face hovering near hers.

He listened to her breathing for a while, then slowly traced the bandage wrapped around her neck with his fingertips. A self-deprecating smile flickered on his lips as he imagined the handprint likely etched beneath the bandage.

"It’s absurd, Eileen."

His hand trembled slightly as it brushed the white fabric. He muttered hopelessly to the woman who couldn’t hear him.

"I nearly killed you with my own hands."

He had endured so much pain to bring Eileen back, only to nearly destroy everything. He had believed he was holding up well, but his inability to distinguish between dream and reality revealed just how far he had fallen. He needed to end this before he shattered completely.

"Eileen."

Carefully, Cesare lay beside her. He knew all too well that he was the greatest threat to Eileen at that moment, but he couldn’t bring himself to let go. He wrapped his arms tightly around her small frame.

"Eileen..."

Tonight, he would not sleep.

Throughout the long, sleepless night, Cesare watched over her, his gaze never leaving her face.

***

Eileen had returned a broken mess, with a bandage wrapped around her neck. She was at a loss for how to explain this to anyone. The thought of what she would say to the Grand Duchy’s staff or to Sonio weighed heavily on her mind.

Yet no one asked her what had happened or how she had been injured. It seemed Cesare had already spoken to them beforehand.

*Cesare...*

Eileen sighed, setting her fountain pen aside. When she had woken that morning, Cesare was already gone. She had so many questions piling up inside her, waiting for him.

And yet, when she faced him, she felt as though she wouldn’t be able to ask a single one. The memory of his hands tightening around her neck and the words he had spoken while doing so haunted her.

"I love you."

Eileen had never truly understood Cesare before, but now he seemed even more incomprehensible. She had always trusted that he had his reasons and waited for him to reveal his intentions, but...

But he’s hurting.

She couldn’t stop thinking about his bloodshot eyes and the way he had stared directly at her as his palm pressed against her throat. The thought of him harming himself again terrified her.

What if it happens again?

Finding and removing the cause of his distress seemed like the best solution. But how could she get Cesare to open up? Was there another way to understand his strange behavior? As she pondered these questions, a voice interrupted her thoughts.

"My lady."

Sonio’s gentle voice pulled Eileen out of her reverie. She realized with a start that she had been holding her fountain pen to the paper for too long, causing the ink to smudge across the page. She quickly lifted the pen, her face flushing with guilt as she looked up at Sonio.

"It’s all right. It wasn’t an important document."

Sonio calmly replaced the ruined sheet with a fresh one. Eileen took a deep breath, steadying herself.

Thanks to Sonio’s dedicated tutoring, Eileen had learned to handle most of her duties. Lately, Sonio only needed to assist her with more complex tasks or verify her work. Once she improved a few remaining areas, she would be able to manage everything on her own.

Eileen resumed writing, the pen scratching lightly against the paper. Since she had injured her throat and decided to remain silent for the day, she had been communicating with Sonio through written notes.

[Please take a look at this.]

Eileen handed Sonio a piece of paper. She had momentarily forgotten about it while preoccupied with thoughts of Cesare, but today she needed to present it to him and get his opinion.

It was a daily schedule she had drafted for the Grand Duchess, herself. Alongside her official duties, she had also planned time for her research into M*rpheus and her ongoing pharmacy work. The schedule was based on her observations of the household’s daily operations since moving into the grand duchy.

Since it was just her initial idea, she wanted Sonio to review it and provide feedback. She had prepared three alternate schedules in case he found this one lacking.

What if he rejects all of them?

Eileen watched nervously as Sonio read through the schedule, trying to gauge his reaction. Her pen was poised, ready for his response.

[In the morning, I handle the duties of the Grand Duchess. After lunch, I do research, and in the evening, I finish the remaining duties. What do you think?]

She waited anxiously. Finally, Sonio looked up, his face filled with admiration.

"I told you that you didn’t have to concern yourself with the duties of the Grand Duchess, but..."

His expression was one of proud approval, like a parent watching their child achieve something remarkable. Eileen felt a bit shy receiving such praise for something she saw as her responsibility. She scratched her cheek awkwardly with the back of the pen, then wrote again.

[I’d also like to hire someone new to assist me.]

Sonio, the head steward who managed the entire Erzet household, had personally trained Eileen in the responsibilities of the Grand Duchess. His guidance had been instrumental in her swift transition.

However, Eileen knew she couldn’t depend on Sonio forever. He was already occupied with overseeing Cesare’s affairs and managing other household duties. It was time to relieve him of her responsibilities.

She couldn’t bear the thought of Cesare’s resources being squandered on her.

For some reason, Sonio hesitated. He didn’t respond immediately, and when he did, there was a hint of sadness in his voice.

"If that is your wish, my lady, I will make the arrangements."

His tone was tinged with disappointment and melancholy. Eileen was taken aback and quickly scribbled another note.

[I enjoy working with you, Sonio! But you can’t spend all your time managing my affairs.]

Despite her reassurance, Sonio’s expression remained somber. He murmured softly, his face still shadowed with sorrow.

"You’re taking away an old man’s last joy..."

In the end, Eileen had no choice but to promise that she would continue to rely on him. After they concluded their discussion about the schedule, she moved on to the next issue, her pen racing across the page. 𝘧𝘳𝘦ℯ𝓌𝘦𝒷𝘯𝑜𝑣𝘦𝓁.𝒸𝘰𝓂

[Sonio...]

She hesitated for a moment before finishing the sentence.

[Cesare isn’t acting like himself.]

There was no need for further explanation—Sonio would understand exactly what she meant.

Eileen bit her lip, then made her first decision to assert her authority as Grand Duchess.

[Can you summon His Grace’s knights?]

***