The Archduke's Songbird-Chapter 160: Last Words

"I am sorry..." she bowed her head, her voice breaking. "I did something unforgivable..."

Joar’s expression remained calm, but his eyes searched hers. "Like what?" he asked gently.

"I... I cheated on you..." Jessamyn confessed, the words tasting bitter on her tongue.

She didn’t know where she found the guts to tell him the truth, but she did. It was Joar, and he had always valued honesty above all else. She needed to confess, to lay bare her soul in front of him.

Joar’s form flickered, and for a moment, his expression was unreadable. Jessamyn’s heart pounded in her chest, her breath coming in shallow gasps. She felt as if she was teetering on the edge of an abyss, waiting for his judgment.

"I..." Joar began, his voice soft and a smile hung at the corner of his lips. "I understand, Jasmine."

Jessamyn looked up, confusion and pain etched on her face. "You do?"

"Yes," Joar said, his eyes filled with an indescribable calmness. "You did nothing wrong. It was not betrayal."

"But I betrayed you," Jessamyn whispered, her voice trembling. "I betrayed our love."

Joar’s form flickered again, the misty edges of his figure wavering. He looked at Jessamyn with a tenderness that made her heart ache. "No, Jasmine," he said softly. "You didn’t betray me. You lived. Just like I wanted you to, you continued on, even in the face of unbearable grief. That is not betrayal; that is survival."

Jessamyn’s tears flowed more freely, a mix of relief and lingering guilt. "But I was with someone else. I let someone else into my heart, even if just a little... I liked his comfort when I..."

Joar’s spectral form seemed to shimmer with an ethereal light, his presence somehow more comforting than she ever remembered. "Life goes on, dear Jasmine. Love is not a prison. It is a gift. You gave me that gift so freely when we were married. Our love was real and true, and it always will be. But it does not mean you cannot find solace in someone else’s arms. Our marriage ended when I left you. You deserve happiness, even if it is with someone else."

Jessamyn shook her head, struggling to accept his words. "I don’t know... Joar... Is this what you meant when you asked me to be happy? Be honest. Did you really want me to find someone else?"

Joar’s expression was filled with infinite patience and understanding. "You loved me with everything you had, Jasmine. That was more than I ever wished for. I am grateful I got to experience your blemishless love wholly for three years. Short as they were, it is enough for me..."

Jessamyn’s tears flowed again, a mix of relief and confusion. "But Joar, I feel so lost without you. How can I move on when my heart still longs for you?"

Joar’s form flickered slightly, his eyes softening as he looked at her. "It is because of that love, that pure and unwavering love, that I want you to be happy. Your heart is vast, Jasmine, and capable of so much love. Don’t let it wither in sorrow. Let it grow and find new ways to love, to be loved."

"Be loved..." Jessamyn looked down, her hands trembling. "No one’s going to love me as much as you did, Joar. I don’t know if I can love another... I feel like I’m betraying you, betraying us."

Joar’s voice was gentle, like a soothing breeze. "There is no betrayal in moving forward, Jasmine. Our time together was beautiful, and it shaped who you are. But your story doesn’t end with me. It continues, and it is filled with potential for new beginnings and new joys. You have my blessing to live, to love, and to be happy."

"I thought he killed you..." Jessamyn said. "I asked your mother if she killed you... Were you killed, Joar? Did someone take you from me?"

It was something that had been nagging at her heart. Why not ask him? She didn’t want to continue their previous talk. She couldn’t believe Joar would ask her to move on and find happiness with another man.

Is this even Joar?

Joar chuckled. "Oh, my Darling Jasmine... Oh, my darling..." His form lingered near her, his face closer to hers. "My time ended and I died. I am sorry I made it hard for you. But my darling... Oh, darling... How much do you love me?" he asked, his face flickering with sadness.

"Very much... That’s why I cannot leave you. I can stay here," she said, a smile appearing on her face for the first time in a long while, a smile from her heart.

Her eyes clouded with tears. She observed him, still caught in disbelief. He was sitting in front of her on his knees. He didn’t look happy and appeared to be in a hurry. She had a feeling he was not telling her something.

But she didn’t want to let him go. She couldn’t even think about the idea of him disappearing anymore.

"Here?" Joar asked, his voice laced with confusion.

"Yes, here. Where I can see you and talk to you. I shall stay here with you until I join you."

Joar let out an exasperated sigh, seeing that the effort he put up all this time had gone to waste.

"Jasmine, my love," he said, his tone both gentle and firm, "I cannot stay..." he pressed his lips. Then he shook his head. "You have more to say to me?" he asked, his everlasting patience ruling his face.

Jessamyn nodded, with a bright smile. She knew he would give her what she wanted. She was the only man who loved her enough to pamper her to the skies.

Her smile reduced as the topic she was about to discuss weighed in on her. "I talked to your mother that day..." she paused observing the slight flicker of something she rarely saw on his face—hatred. "She revealed why she killed our son..."

"It was my fault..." Joar held out his hand to touch Jessamyn’s hand but it passed through and he bowed his head in despair. "I didn’t wait until~"

"No, Joar," Jessamyn stopped him. "It was not your fault. Do not blame yourself. It was my bad luck we lost our son..."

Joar gathered his courage to look at her. "He is the better lover..." he said.

Jessamyn reeled back wondering what he meant.

"I didn’t think you were..." keeping yourself for the wedding and I~"

"I instigated it," Jessamyn said.

That day still lingered in her mind.