The Alpha's Fated Outcast: Rise Of The Moonsinger.-Chapter 323: A Change of Heart

Lyla

I woke up feeling oddly refreshed. For the first time in a long while, I'd had a dreamless sleep- no nightmares about Nathan, no visions of the Dark One, just peaceful darkness.

When I opened my eyes, I saw Terra brewing something at the small table by the window—the familiar scent of herbs filled the room.

"You're awake?" she asked, noticing my movement.

I nodded and slipped out of bed, moving to the window. I was in Ramsey's bedroom, the Alpha suite on the top floor of the pack house. Outside, everything looked peaceful. Birds chirped in the nearby trees, pack members went about their morning routines, and there was no sign of chaos or battle. The attack from White Lake hadn't started yet.

That should be a good thing. But I had this strange feeling that something was hanging over us, looming in the darkness, waiting to strike, like a fearful premonition. I didn't know what this meant, and I never anticipated that White Lake would suddenly turn against us.

Did it have something to do with my visions of Neriah? My vision had ended with Thames asking her to run away with him. Did she do that? What happened next? Did it have anything to do with White Lake or White Moon?

There was a connection between both packs. There was something about it, but I couldn't place my finger on it. I didn't have even the slightest idea what that could be. We needed Warriors from White Lake because of their unique trait, which is perfect for fighting the Dark One.

Why not warriors from White Moon, White Hill, or White Cloud? As I pondered these thoughts, I returned to the bed as Terra approached with a steaming cup.

"Drink all of it," she murmured, pressing the cup into my hands.

I nodded and drank the liquid, grimacing at its bitter taste. I waited for her to hand me more herbal concoctions—she usually insisted on at least three different brews for healing—but was surprised to see her packing up her supplies.

"No more healing tonics?" I asked.

Terra shook her head. "Now that you're pregnant, I can only give you things that won't harm the baby and will nourish it."

I rolled my eyes and touched my stomach. "I'd almost forgotten about that," I muttered. "Are you sure there's even a baby here?"

"I'm surprised you haven't gone to see a healer yet," Terra said quietly, wiping down the table. "Aren't you curious?"

"If it's true, it'll get to Ramsey's ears before I take a step outside that room, and I told you, it's better that Ramsey or anyone doesn't know about the baby."

She glanced at me but didn't say anything. Instead, she continued wiping down the table.

An uncomfortable thought that had been growing overnight suddenly flitted into my mind. I walked over to Terra, lowering my voice.

"I've decided I don't want to keep the baby," I said. "There must be some herbal concoction to help—"

Terra interrupted me, her expression closing off. "I don't know anything about that," she said quietly. "I've never been pregnant. The priestesses at the Moon Temple never needed anything in that regard. Honestly, I don't know."

I smirked, not believing her for a second. "How did you make the herbal drink you just gave me?"

"I asked a healer, and he recommended it," she replied stiffly. She began gathering her supplies more rapidly. "You can do whatever you want with the baby and the pregnancy, but leave me out of it."

"Please!" I begged. "Maybe you could ask this healer; he would know what would be suitable."

"No, thank you," she shook her head. "The only reason I am caring for you is because your mother asked. Otherwise, I am not responsible for anything yet."

Without another word, she swept out of the room, closing the door behind her.

Almost immediately, the door opened again as Ramsey walked in. He wore a puzzled expression.

"What was that about?" he asked, glancing toward the hallway where Terra had disappeared.

I returned to the window, avoiding his gaze. "What was what about?"

Ramsey approached me slowly. "Terra seemed angry. She didn't greet me in her usual cheery way. Did you fight with her?"

"Because I have nothing better to do than fight with everyone?" I retorted, moving away from the window and feeling suddenly irritated.

Ramsey followed, his tone softening. "I'm sorry. That wasn't my intention."

I scoffed and said nothing, crossing my arms over my chest.

Ramsey sighed and came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. We rocked slowly together for a few minutes, his warmth seeping into my back.

A different kind of heat began to build inside me. My hormones were in chaos—one moment irritated, the next aroused. I tried to control the desire spreading through my body, but my pheromones betrayed me, filling the air with my scent.

Ramsey caught it immediately. He turned me slowly to face him, his eyes darkening. His lips found mine in a hungry kiss. I melted against him, my arms winding around his neck as his hands pulled me closer. His tongue teased the seam of my lips until I opened for him, deepening the kiss into something more needy.

I pressed my body against him, suddenly feeling wanton. With all the chaos, we've not been intimate for a while, so I could understand why my body was acting as if it didn't get Ramsey now it would melt.

Just as my hands began to wander lower, Ramsey broke the kiss. He looked down at me with longing, gently stroking my face.

"I'll be meeting Elder Thorne in an hour," he said, his voice husky. "We would be half satiated in an hour, my love."

I fought the urge to reach out for him and continue from where we stopped, but what he said was the truth. Also, I know it was a poor excuse. Ramsey would never be intimate with me as I am still healing, but I know he didn't want to say that.

"Would you like to come with me?" he asked, breaking into my thoughts.

I nodded, still feeling dazed from the kiss. "I'd like that."

"I need to freshen up first," I added, trying to gather my scattered thoughts.

"Of course." Ramsey smiled, then his expression turned more serious. "I've spoken to the joining priest. Two days from today, we'll be joined officially."

My mood instantly shifted.

"There will be no ceremony or fanfare," he continued, misreading my expression. "Just a small crowd, if that's what you're trying to avoid. Our union is long overdue."

I sighed heavily and walked away from him. Marriage. Another commitment, another chain when all I wanted was space to think, to also come to terms that my death was imminent.

Ramsey followed me. "What's wrong?"

I turned to face him, the words coming out before I could stop them. "I don't want to marry you."

His face fell. He looked shocked and hurt at the same time, almost as if he couldn't believe my response. In the past, I would brush him off with excuses.

"Why?" he asked, taking a step toward me. "What do you want me to do before we tie the knot? Tell me, please."

"I told you, Ramsey, that I would only consider getting married to you after this war, but if you keep this up, you'll make me lose interest," I sighed, moving away from him. I didn't want to keep meeting his eyes.

"Now or after the war is the same thing, Lyla. I need – we need to have a claim on each other to an extent. Besides, I want to spend my waking moments with you, knowing we don't have to worry about anything if an unplanned event happens?"

"An unplanned event?" I stuttered, looking at him. "What are you talking about?"

"Pre-Pregnancy," shrugged. "You could…"

"Moonsingers do not get pregnant," I stopped him before he could complete his sentence. "If that's why you want to marry me, because you're desperate to breed children, then…"

"It doesn't matter," he said quickly, trying to hold my hand, but I side-stepped him and moved towards the door. What matters most is that I want to be with you. Please!"

I stared at him for some seconds, then shook my head.

"I've changed my mind about going with you to meet Elder Thorne," I added quietly. "I think I'll go for a run instead."

Before he could say anything more, I left the room, unable to bear the pain in his eyes or explain feelings I didn't fully understand myself.

In the hallway, I leaned against the wall, trying to still my heart pounding. Why had I said that? Did I truly not want to marry Ramsey, or was it fear speaking? Fear of commitment, fear of the future, fear of the responsibility of carrying not just a child but the destiny of a Moonsinger?

And what about the baby? The thought of ending the pregnancy had come to me last night. With the Dark One lurking, with battles raging on all sides, how could I bring a child into this chaos? How could I focus on being a Moonsinger, fulfilling whatever destiny awaited me, while caring for an infant in a war I didn't know how long it would last?