Reincarnated as a Fat Bastard in an Eroge Game-Chapter 30: In a Fix

"You cooked?" I asked, staring at the meal set before me.

"As you can see, yes," she replied.

I looked at her, then back down at the dish. "Is this pasta?"

It was pasta, certainly, but it was red—an intense, vibrant red. What the hell was this supposed to be?

"Heh? You really are an ungrateful brat," she said. She walked to the dining table and leaned forward, her eyes narrowing. "You should be honored to even see my cooking, let alone get the chance to taste it. Any more nonsense from you and you’ll starve for the rest of the week."

I grimaced. It seemed I had fallen into the clutches of this beautiful woman, and escaping was not on the agenda anytime soon.

After she discovered my memory issues, she had strongly advised—or rather, commanded—that I remain with her. Without my memories, she claimed I was in danger from those who knew about my bloodline, a legacy I was still struggling to understand. Even when I tried to argue that I could take care of myself, she ended the conversation with two impossible conditions for my departure: one, I had to become stronger than her; and two, I had to regain my memories.

The first condition was a lost cause for now. She was a literal monster in terms of power. Given how much she knew about my bloodline, it was safe to assume the "old me" had been handled quite often, meaning she was far too powerful for me to surpass in the near future. As for my memory, that was a work in progress with no guaranteed end date.

Critically speaking, staying was the logical choice. She could protect me, and more importantly, I could leverage her absurd strength to build my own.

"Fine," I muttered.

I picked up the fork, hesitating for a moment as I feared for the integrity of my stomach. But the second I caught her annoyed expression and those squinted, cat-like eyes, I decided to take the risk.

I took a large bite.

Seeing that I had actually started eating, her expression softened into a smile. She stepped back, resting her hands on her waist. "So?"

I stared at her, my eyes wide. "It’s... good," I managed to say.

"Just good?" She tilted her head, that signature grin returning to her face.

"It’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted..." I admitted.

I began to inhale the meal. Suddenly, the heat hit me. "Fuck, it’s hot! Really hot! Water... I need water!" I panted audibly.

I’d had low expectations, but one bite was enough to vanish all hesitation. The taste was inexplicable—spicy on an entirely different level, yet incredibly delicious.

"Calm down, tiger," she said, her voice dropping an octave as she rubbed my back. "No one is taking it away."

I didn’t slow down for a second. It felt as though my tongue was on fire, a localized agony that I somehow wanted more of. I kept going until the plate was polished clean. I reached for the water she’d placed beside me and drained the glass in one go.

"Damn. I need more."

I turned my head to find her sitting beside me, her chin resting on her hand as she watched me. "Are you done?"

I caught my breath and nodded.

"Satisfied?"

"Not really," I replied instantly.

She picked up the empty plate and disappeared into the kitchen, returning moments later with a fresh, heaping portion.

"Here. Eat up. You’ll need all the energy you can get."

I ignored the cryptic warning and dived back into the meal. Just like the first round, it didn’t take long before the plate was spotless.

"Another?"

I nodded shamelessly. She brought another round, and then another. I kept eating until I finally slumped back against the chair, staring at the ceiling in total exhaustion. To think that eating could tire me out this much.

"That’s enough," she said, clearing the plates.

When she returned, I finally took a moment to really look at her outfit. She was dressed in a tight white blouse tucked into a black pencil skirt that barely reached mid-thigh. Over it, she wore a white netted coat that flowed down to her knees. Her hair was tucked neatly into a black leather chef’s cap accented with pink details.

"What’s with that look?" she asked.

I exhaled slowly. "Thank you for the meal."

She nodded. "Good. Now get ready. Your daily warm-ups start in a few minutes. Also, drink this; it should help you digest quickly."

She placed a small green potion on the table and pulled her coat closed before turning to leave.

Daily warm-ups, huh? Let’s see what she has in store.

....

....

"YOU CALL THIS A WARM-UP?!"

I screamed the words into the biting wind, my boots thudding against a literal wasteland of ice. Behind me, a small army of bears and various mana beasts were hot on my heels. I knew the lady was a lunatic, but this was beyond the pale.

"Shut up and keep running, unless you want to be on the menu."

Her voice echoed in my mind, and I obeyed. According to her, all I had to do was escape the monsters and my "warm-up" for today would be over. I hadn’t even known there were Grimoires or artifacts dedicated solely to staves—the very thing she had used to teleport me here.

Wherever "here" was.

If I had to guess, it was the North Pole or somewhere equally desolate. The entire landscape was a jagged expanse of permafrost. I didn’t even understand how these creatures survived in such a climate, but that wasn’t my immediate concern. My problem was finding an escape route in an unfamiliar, lethal terrain. Was that lunatic actually trying to kill me?

I kept running, but no matter how many miles I put behind me or which direction I veered, the creatures remained tenaciously on my trail. The environment was maddeningly open, offering nothing to break their line of sight. Large, frozen mountains loomed in the distance, but heading for them felt like a gamble. They could easily be dead ends, and even if I found a cave, there was no guarantee the horrors inside wouldn’t be worse than the ones currently hunting me.

A chorus of enraged roars erupted behind me, the sound vibrating through my very bones. It killed the exhaustion in my limbs, forcing my legs to pump even harder despite the fact that my muscles felt like they were literally on fire.

End up on a menu, huh? She wouldn’t actually let them kill me... right?

[Based on my knowledge of her, she isn’t exactly right in the head.]

Brilliant. Exactly what I needed to hear right now.

[You’re welcome,] she replied.

I clicked my tongue in irritation. Are you stupid or just pretending? I was being sarcastic.

[I know.]

I decided to ignore her and focus on not getting eaten. She was just as annoying as ever.

After what felt like hours, I reached a steep, inclined plane. it wasn’t quite a mountain, but the slope was punishing. I risked a glance back and saw the Tyrids, those colossal bears, and those sickening fiends made of writhing tentacles. Why the hell weren’t they fighting each other? Why was their entire collective focus pinned solely on killing me?

Frustrated and pushed to my limit, I looked back at the slope. I only had one shot at this. If I couldn’t overcome the steepness and fell back down, I was completely cooked. I grounded myself, clenching my teeth in raw determination.

"Ahhh!"

I let out an unnecessary war cry—mostly just to convince myself I could actually do it—and charged up the hill. With every agonizing step, I forced the next. It was so incredibly stupid. How was it that those who slept with me got stronger while I, the one with the "cheat" bloodline, remained a scrawny wimp? Was this fate’s way of balancing the scales? Or was I literally transferring my own potential to my partners, further condemning myself?

"Ahhhhhhh!"

I roared again as I reached the point where my momentum began to fail.

"Stop screaming like an idiot and run. You’re slipping."

That psycho’s voice in my head only infuriated me further. "SHUT THE FUCK UP! You’re not helping!"

"Bold, aren’t we? Fine then. Let’s see how you fare."

As if on cue, my next step failed. My foot slipped on the slick ice, and I found myself tumbling backward. I spun as I fell, watching as some of the monsters collided with one another at the base of the incline. A few seemed to regain their predatory senses and began tearing into each other, but one remained focused. It stood directly beneath my descent, its massive jaws unhinged and poised to devour me in a single chomp.

I always hated that blasted fiend.

With that thought, I reached for the sword at my waist. My mana flared instinctively. Can’t run forever, can I?

A thick, oily shadow encased the blade, tripling its length in a heartbeat. I raised it high above my head.

"Ahhhhhhh!"

I let out one last war cry—mostly because it felt like the right thing to do in the moment—and brought the sword slashing down. To my genuine surprise, the blade moved with terrifying ease.

The monster combusted into a disgusting mass of shredded flesh. A fair amount of it splashed across my face and clothes.

"Gross," I spat.

I landed and instinctively dropped into a combat stance. It felt natural, flowing directly from muscle memory. I realized then that I had been underestimating Leo. He was actually quite skilled with a sword; I likely hadn’t noticed during the exams because I’d been using a damn dagger the entire time.

Suddenly, one of the colossal bears—having just finished devouring a Tyrid—lunged for my neck. I leaned back, feeling the wind of its claws miss my throat by a mere inch. I spun on my heel, slashing through one of its thick legs. The beast collapsed with a heavy thud.

I moved to split its skull open, but my instincts flared again. I spun around just in time to see the wide-open maw of a Tyrid aimed at my jugular. A thick mass of shadow materialized into a shield; the monster’s teeth cracked against the dark energy, and before it could recover, my sword was already moving.

I lopped its head clean off. Without breaking the motion, I drove the blade into the fallen bear’s head. With a surge of shadow manipulation, blades of darkness erupted from within the beast’s skull, completely liquifying its brain. Even if it were a zombie, there was no coming back from that.

I stood up, wiping the gore from my eyes as I watched three more bears and two Tyrids close in.

It seemed this was going to take a lot longer than I wanted it to.

"Well fuck me,"