My Three Beautiful Vampire Wives can hear my Inner Thoughts-Chapter 175: No Feelings
For a brief moment after her question, the room seemed to hold its breath.
Cain looked at her.
He saw everything clearly.
The faint redness in her eyes from crying, the stubborn strength in the way she stood even after exposing her heart, the warmth in her gaze that did not hide or hesitate anymore. She had crossed a line that most people would never dare to cross, and she did it without pulling back, without trying to protect herself.
And yet—
There was nothing.
No pull.
No warmth.
No reaction.
"...What is this?"
The thought came slowly, almost confused.
He had faced death countless times.
He had felt rage, hunger, satisfaction, even amusement.
But now—
Standing in front of someone who clearly cared for him this much—
He felt nothing.
Not even discomfort.
Not even awkwardness.
Just... emptiness.
His chest felt hollow, like something that should be there had been taken out long ago without him noticing.
Pam was still looking at him.
Waiting.
Her hand rested lightly against his chest, as if she could feel something through it, as if she expected his heartbeat to answer for him if his words did not.
"...Cain?"
Her voice softened again.
"...Say something."
He did not move right away.
"...I..."
The word came out slowly, almost uncertain.
"...don’t know what to say."
Her expression flickered for a moment.
"...You don’t know?"
A faint smile tried to form on her lips, but it did not fully settle.
"...Then I’ll say it again."
She took a small breath, steadying herself, as if preparing to dive deeper instead of pulling back.
"...I want you."
Her voice did not shake this time.
It was clear.
Certain.
"...Not just as someone I knew."
"...Not just as someone I lost."
Her fingers curled slightly against his clothes.
"...I want to be with you."
She stepped closer.
"...This time, I don’t want to run."
"...I don’t want to wait."
"...I don’t want to miss the chance again."
Her gaze locked onto his.
"...I want to stay with you."
Her words came faster now, like something she had held in for too long.
"...We can figure everything out together."
"...Whatever happened to you, whatever you became, it doesn’t matter."
"...You’re still you."
Her voice softened again.
"...And that’s enough for me."
Cain listened.
He understood every word.
Every meaning.
Every intention behind it.
But still—
Nothing came back.
"...Why?"
He could hear her.
He could understand her.
But he could not feel her.
Not in the way she wanted.
Not in the way he knew he should.
"...This isn’t normal."
His gaze lowered slightly.
"...Or maybe it is."
A quiet thought.
Cold.
Detached.
"...Maybe this is what I became."
Pam stepped even closer, her hands now fully holding onto him, as if trying to bridge the distance that he did not seem to notice.
"...Say something."
Her voice carried a hint of pleading now.
"...Anything."
Cain looked at her again.
"...You’re very direct."
She blinked.
"...That’s what you got from everything I said?"
He gave a small shrug.
"...It’s honest."
Her expression tightened slightly.
"...That’s not what I meant."
"...I know."
He tilted his head just a little.
"...But it’s what I can respond to."
The air between them grew heavier.
She searched his face again.
"...Why do you feel so far away?"
The question came out quietly.
"...You’re right here..."
Her fingers pressed slightly against his chest.
"...But it feels like you’re not."
Cain did not answer.
Because he did not have one.
Then—
He spoke.
"...Tell me something."
She blinked, caught off guard by the sudden change.
"...What?"
His eyes met hers.
"...How much do you love me?"
The question landed heavily.
Pam froze.
"...What?"
He did not look away.
"...You heard me."
Her cheeks flushed faintly, a mix of embarrassment and disbelief crossing her face.
"...You’re asking me that now?"
"Yes."
"...Why?"
"...I want to hear it."
She hesitated.
Her eyes moved slightly, as if searching for an escape from the sudden weight of the question.
"...You’re unfair..."
Her voice dropped.
"...You already know..."
"I want to hear it anyway."
Silence stretched between them.
Then—
She looked down for a moment.
Took a breath.
And spoke.
"...I love you enough to regret not holding your hand when I had the chance."
Her voice was soft.
Careful.
"...I love you enough that when everything was ending, you were the only thing I could think about."
Her fingers tightened slightly.
"...I love you enough that even now, after everything changed, after everything we lost..."
She looked back up at him. 𝒇𝒓𝙚𝒆𝔀𝓮𝓫𝒏𝓸𝙫𝓮𝓵.𝓬𝙤𝙢
"...I still chose you."
Her voice grew steadier.
"...If I had another life..."
"...If I had another chance..."
"...I would stay by your side from the start."
Her lips pressed together for a moment before she continued.
"...I want to eat with you."
"...Talk with you."
"...Fight beside you again."
A faint smile formed, fragile but real.
"...And yes..."
She hesitated for a second, then pushed through it.
"...I want to sleep with you."
The words came out quieter.
"...I want to know you in every way I couldn’t before."
Her gaze did not waver.
"...That’s how much I love you."
Silence followed.
Heavy.
Expectant.
Cain listened.
Every word.
Every detail.
Every feeling she poured into it.
And yet—
Nothing changed.
No warmth.
No reaction.
No pull.
Just the same hollow stillness.
"...I see."
That was all he said.
Pam’s expression froze.
"...That’s it?"
He nodded slightly.
"...That’s it."
Her hands slowly loosened their grip on him.
"...You..."
Her voice faltered.
"...You don’t feel anything?"
Cain did not lie.
"...No."
The word landed like a blade.
Clean.
Direct.
Unavoidable.
Her breath hitched.
"...Not even a little?"
"...No."
The silence that followed was heavier than anything before.
Her eyes trembled.
"...Then..."
She swallowed.
"...Do I have a chance?"
The question came out fragile.
Careful.
As if she already feared the answer.
Cain opened his mouth.
But no words came out.
Not because he did not want to answer.
But because—
He did not know how.
"...A chance..."
What did that even mean to him now?
Could he give her something he did not feel?
Could he promise something he could not understand?
His silence stretched too long.
Pam’s expression broke.
Not loudly.
Not dramatically.
But in a quiet way that hurt more.
"...I see..."
Her voice dropped.
"...That’s enough of an answer."
She stepped back.
Her hands fell to her sides.
"...I was too late again..."
Her gaze lowered.
"...Even this time..."
Cain watched her.
Still unable to feel what he knew should be there.
But then—
Something moved.
Not from her.
From somewhere else.
A memory.
No—
A feeling.
It rose without warning.
Sharp.
Strong.
Overwhelming.
Faith.
Ivira.
Cornelia.
The moment their presence touched his mind, something inside him reacted violently, like a locked door being forced open.
"...What is this...?"
It was not gentle.
It was not controlled.
It surged through him, filling the emptiness with something intense and suffocating.
Attachment.
Possession.
Connection.
"...I..."
His hand twitched slightly.
"...I can feel..."
It was different.
Completely different.
Not like what Pam had shown him.
Not like what he should feel.
But something far stronger.
Far more binding.
"...Why only them?"
The answer came quickly.
"...The blood pact."
It wrapped around his existence like chains he could not see but could fully feel now that he had noticed them.
Pam looked up again, her expression still fragile.
"...Cain?"
He looked at her.
"...I’m entangled."
Her brows furrowed.
"...What do you mean?"
His voice came out low.
"...With a blood pact."
Her eyes widened.
"...A blood pact...?"
He nodded once.
"...With three wives."
The words settled between them.
Heavy.
Real.
Pam froze.
"...Does that mean..."
She did not finish.
But she did not need to.
Cain gave a small nod.
"...Yes."
Her eyes flickered with realization.
The confusion.
The pain.
The missing piece.
It all clicked into place.
"...That’s why..."
Her voice softened.
"...You can’t feel anything for me..."
Cain did not respond.
But he did not deny it either.
Pam took a slow breath.
Then another.
Her expression changed.
Not completely healed.
But steadier.
"...I see..."
She looked at him again.
"...Then what should I do?"
The question came out simple.
Honest.
"...Tell me."
Cain froze.
"...What?"
"...If that’s the problem..."
Her gaze did not waver.
"...Then tell me what to do."
His mind moved instantly.
"...Break it."
The answer was clear.
"...Break the blood pact."
"...End it."
"...Separate from them."
It was simple.
Logical.
Necessary.
He opened his mouth.
"...You should—"
Nothing came out.
His expression changed slightly.
"...What?"
He tried again.
"...You should bre—"
Silence.
The words stopped before they could form.
"...No..."
His brows furrowed.
"...That’s not..."
He tried to force it.
"...Break the—"
Nothing.
Not even a sound.
His throat tightened.
"...What is this?"
Pam watched him, confused.
"...Cain?"
He shook his head slightly.
"...Wait."
He tried again.
Different approach.
"...You need to—"
Nothing.
"...Separate—"
Nothing.
"...Leave—"
Nothing.
His breathing grew slightly uneven.
"...Why can’t I say it?"
He tried again.
More force.
"...Break the blood pact with my—"
Silence.
Complete.
Absolute.
His eyes widened slightly.
"...No way..."
Pam stepped closer again.
"...What’s wrong?"
Cain’s voice dropped.
"...I can’t say it."
"...What do you mean?"
"I mean I literally can’t say it."
He tried again.
His lips moved.
But no words came out.
"...This..."
His hand clenched slightly.
"...This is part of it too..."
The realization hit hard.
The blood pact was not just binding his feelings.
It was controlling his words.
His choices.
"...You’re kidding me..."
He tried one last time.
Forcing everything he had into it.
"...Break—"
Nothing.
His voice failed completely.
Silence swallowed the word before it could exist.
Cain’s expression twisted slightly, frustration breaking through his usual calm for the first time.
"...Noooooo..."
His voice came out low.
Almost disbelieving.
"...I couldn’t even say it!"
