My Alleged Husband-Chapter 1493 - 1287: Heartless Deception

The warmth I feel in my chest is actually the joy you gave me. I remember all of it, and I actually understand that when love becomes tired and leaves, what remains is a heart-piercing tenderness. Without him, I have nothing.

When the piano plays a song that matches the mood so well, all I hear is my crying. When the dream is over and you’ve awoken, what remains is just the cruelest heartache.

Zhang Zhentian knows that these things in his son’s eyes may not be so easy to let go. As a child abandoned by his own parents, how could he not hate? But there were things that he could not decide, and in the end, he could only blame himself, saying that the decision he made back then resulted in all this mess.

"In your eyes, is it that as long as you say ’I’m sorry’ casually when you’ve done something wrong, everything can become as if nothing ever happened?

In your eyes, is a ’sorry’ really so worthless? Can a ’sorry’ make all the mistakes you’ve made as if they never happened? Have you ever thought about how much ridicule your child would face because of your actions?

Maybe in your eyes, you’ve never considered these things because all you care about is your dream-seeking freedom. In your eyes, what does your child count for? With or without, you can make your child happy because of some things, and you can also let your child live a life filled with unbearable pain because of your actions.

There are very few parents in the world as selfish as you, but why are you never willing to consider things from your child’s perspective? Is it so hard to think about me?

I am your child, in this life, you have only me, but the way you act, do you really treat me like your child?

In your eyes, I’m not your child, but merely a tool to be used. Your actions truly make me afraid. You chose to abandon me for freedom; will you choose again to completely abandon me in the future for other reasons?"

Zhang Zhentian never thought that his child would think of him this way deep down. This time he came back for her, doesn’t he know? All these years, does he truly not understand the guilt I feel towards him?

For the sake of my child, I have never lived happily all these years and always thought about how my actions made my child feel embarrassed, how my actions caused my child to face so much ridicule. So no matter what others say, I always wanted to let my child live happily, but I have given him nothing.

"Child, I know there are things in your heart that can never be changed, but can’t you try to understand the hardships in our hearts as parents? We were truly forced to abandon you. Step by step, I was pushed to a dead end. I hope you can stay happily by our side, but our actions ultimately hurt you. This outcome is something none of us could have imagined!

You will never understand the heart-wrenching pain a parent feels after completely abandoning their child. All these years, we have been enduring such pain. We never blamed anyone else for this pain because we know it was caused by us. We can only watch as this pain eats away at our hearts, powerless to stand there.

Throughout your journey of growing up, although we weren’t by your side, we were always part of your growth. We watched you endure so many hardships. Do you think, as parents, we felt no pain in our hearts? We chose to stay silent because we didn’t know where to begin explaining. All this suffering was caused by the decisions we made. So what could we say? We can only watch you endure all the pain silently, as we are powerless. You chose this path yourself, aiming to prove to your parents that you’re the best. That’s why you live so tiredly every day. Have you ever thought about how we are supposed to live?

I know you have resentment towards us, but if you truly have any dissatisfaction or hatred, please direct all your hatred towards me. Don’t hate your mother. Hating me is enough because all of this is the result of my actions alone. You have no right to hate her. She gave you life, painstakingly brought you into this world. You should understand that kind of pain. Don’t hate her anymore. If there is any mistake, let me, your father, take the blame for your mother!"

"It seems you are truly devoted to my mother. Even in hatred towards me, you are willing to take her place. But let me ask, does my mother truly have you in her heart? She has treated you like a substitute all these years, yet you are always steadfastly devoted to her. Every mistake she makes, you can overlook. I can overlook, not care, but I can’t; no matter what, you are my father!

Maybe I really shouldn’t intervene in your affairs, but have you never considered how your actions cast a shadow over me? You’ve never considered how painful my daily life is. All I wanted was a stable life, but what did I ultimately get? Have you ever thought about it?

Perhaps in your eyes, obtaining an ordinary and happy life is simplistic, but for me, the younger generation, it’s truly difficult. I never got your company. You still have no right to request any changes from me because of you. You have no such privilege!"

"Anyway, I only hope you remember that no matter what happens, just don’t hate your mother along with me. No matter how much hatred you have towards me, even if you hate me to the core, I can happily accept it. But the one thing I can never accept is your hatred towards your mother because she truly wanted to stay by your side. She eventually chose a different way to love you, and this way happens to be the one you can never accept in your life!"

I just wanted to hold on quietly, but who knew it would be the song of the horizon, and that gentleness turned into madness enveloping me. I can’t see through it, can’t guess it, and can’t understand why the gap between us is so large.