Most Powerful Entity in Academy-Chapter 68: Kynar Voss 3
"Life is a constant beginning. Every morning we are reborn; every morning we choose again: whether we will live as slaves or as free people. Most never even notice the choice. But those who do, with every breath they remake the world." — Albus Camus
Kynar Voss POV (continued)
Denial.
Yes, I was in denial.
Because I had orphaned a fourteen-year-old elf girl who hadn’t even come of age... and driven her to suicide.
When I returned to the Church, I quit my position.
How can I continue to work there?
i cant
However, I provided reliable sources with intelligence about Cardinal Joshua.
I only left the little girl’s last words in a tiny corner of a twelve-page report, so that her disappearance from the world would not be in vain.
If anyone searched, it would look normal, and who would suspect the head of the Inquisition?
They really do research and quickly found out about what Cardinal Joshua really did.
He committed every crime against god.
That mf is going to be in hell for sure.
He’s execution was kept secret from the public.
They told to public this is just a replacement.
But all empires know how Cardinal Joshua was tortured and killed in the end.
But does that matter?
Is this the ultimate question a human can ask themselves?
No.
This is the answer to that question.
"Hmph." I despised myself for these thoughts.
I rarely drank alcohol — only occasionally.
But after that incident, I couldn’t pull myself together.
My wife, Samira, tried to support me, but I pushed her away.
I was practically retired.
All my money went to alcohol, bit by bit.
To forget those cursed memories a little... Just to quiet my conscience a little.
Who knows how many more families I destroyed?
How many people have I widowed?
God, forgive me.
I was depressed.
The weight that fell on me made me feel like Atlas.
A Titan condemned to hold up the heavens.
No matter how much he wants to let go, he can’t.
No matter how much he wants to flee, he can’t.
All you can do is rebel, and the world doesn’t give a damn about your rebellion.
Because of that, I feel like a slave.
But that’s the truth.
My wife Samira’s voice reached me while I was still drunk.
"Please, Kynar, stop the alcohol. Pull yourself together," Samira said.
We were sitting at the dinner table.
"No."
Samira was furious. "Damn it, Kynar, what happened to you on that mission?! You’ve become a completely different person."
"You can’t understand my pain, Samira," I said.
But Samira was crying. "Damn it, damn it, do you think you’re the only one suffering? Because of you, our child..."
My eyes widened. "What did you say?"
"Kynar, before you left, I wanted to give you happy news. I was pregnant."
What?
Why is she using the past tense?
No, don’t tell me.....
I slammed the table.
"FUCK, KEEP GOING, SAMIRA!"
I didn’t hold myself longer. Even though she is my wife, she didn’t even say a thing since I returned, and she chose this moment to talk?
"I had the child, Kynar. When you slapped me, that blow caused me to lose our baby."
My vision went black.
Even though I was drunk...
Samira wiped her tears with her sleeve. "From now on, you’re on your own, Kynar. I’m leaving. I’m divorcing you," she said.
She stomped her foot and stormed into the bedroom.
My head was pounding.
These revelations...
I couldn’t take it and collapsed to the floor.
That slap couldn’t have been the cause.
But I had been angry, and Samira had just stumbled in that moment.
She must have fallen after I left...
I felt like my world was gone.
My child.
My child died, and I am the murderer!
When I woke from passing out, her things were gone.
My wife, Samira, had left me.
Or maybe she just wanted to give me time.
I can’t bear all of this.
Why did everything happen to me?
I made these choices myself, but was I really free?
Did I kill multiple people because of god or just to feel more pleasure?
But those questions only made me despise myself more.
Freedom?
When a person asks himself, "Am I free?", does he realize he isn’t?
My wife was gone.
I had dreamed of having a son and playing games with him.
I lived those dreams.
But not in the real world — in the fake world I earned by drinking alcohol. 𝕗𝐫𝚎𝗲𝘄𝐞𝕓𝐧𝕠𝘃𝕖𝐥.𝐜𝚘𝚖
Hallucinations...
My only way to escape this cursed reality.
Only chance to break chains in my heart.
I stopped leaving the house.
I couldn’t eat, only drank a little more to forget.
Vodka, whiskey, tequila... I drank everything.
There wasn’t a moment I was sober.
When friends came to visit, I slammed the door in their faces.
I was still receiving my retirement pension, and back then, the banking system was just being transferred to the virtual world.
That kind of nonsense had only just started.
But there was one more thing nobody knew.
I had secretly hidden Sarah Adams’s body.
Thanks to divine magic, none of the bones or organs in her corpse had decayed.
I did everything I could.
I just created a secret basement to research to bring her life.
Because I have already lost my motivation.
At least I wanted Sarah to wake up and kill me.
Because I don’t even have the luxury of killing myself.
I begged my own God for a miracle.
It didn’t happen.
I turned to other gods.
I researched and researched.
But if I resurrected her with necromancy, she would only be a walking corpse.
True resurrection magic required tier 9.
Back then, I was tier 6.
I pushed myself far, to the point of torment.
Resurrecting that girl became my new obsession.
When I was sober, I searched for methods; when I was tired, I drank.
Sober and drunk.
Two perfect opposites in one life.
But I congratulate all my enemies who cursed me.
YOU SUCCEEDED!
I still remember a man who visited me.
He said that the neighbor hears somebody crying in my home.
I just said Man to "fuck off".
He grabbed me: "You don’t know me, but I know you."
"What do you want?" I don’t know this man, really
He introduced himself as Noah.
He said that he visits every place in Arcadia (world) to share his wisdom with people in need.
"You know Sisyphus," he said.
"Yeah, I know him," I said.
Sisyphos was a famous figure in Greek legends.
In legends. There lived a king named Sisyphus.
He was the cleverest of all mortals.
He cheated death twice, bound Thanatos in chains, and even tricked Persephone.
He saw through the gods’ lies and mocked their secrets.
For this arrogance, the gods condemned him to the most cruel of punishments.
They sentenced him to an eternity of useless labor.
In the depths of the underworld.
Sisyphus was given a single task: to roll an immense boulder up a steep mountain.
Every time he neared the summit, exhausted, sweating, muscles burning, the stone would slip from his grasp and thunder back down to the bottom.
And he would have to begin again.
Forever.
That was a legend of Sisyphos, but this means nothing to me.
This is just an old story.
"We have to think Sisyphos was happy."
What does this priest look like, man, yapping about?
Before he continued, he sighed.
"In my view, Sisyphus is happy because he sees the rock roll back down again every time, and it is precisely in that instant that he is conscious.
He knows that this universe has no master and that he himself is the master of his own fate.
He was like a lion!!
That brief moment when he shoulders the rock once more and starts walking toward the slope—that brief moment filled with consciousness—is Sisyphus’s victory.
This effort that begins anew every time is man’s dignity. Man turns the punishment inflicted on him by the gods into a victory over the gods. Therefore, we must imagine Sisyphus happy."
’He talked so much’tought Kynar.
When he finished, I closed the door.
Noah left Kynar alone.
A long time passed...
Has someone visited me.
Nobody visited since Noah, so that was strange.
When I went to open it, there was a beautiful woman standing there. "Who are you?"
"I’m Stella Everblack, Director of the Academy."
BOOM.
I slammed the door with all my strength.
I rejected that woman every time.
My name was known across the continent in the old days.
It had been more than ten years since I quit my job and Samira left.
That woman came for a whole year, inviting me.
Sometimes I talked to her.
I took advice.
It felt good to speak with someone after so long.
In the end, I couldn’t resist and accepted her offer.
After all, she had promised me many things.
Even the academy library was important.
Especially the section that only professors could enter.
Maybe there was a stone there that could help me progress.
But not foreseeing how this would affect my life was my stupidity.
Director Stella had given me a purpose in life.
Like light after darkness.
But I had priorities.
No matter what, Sarah Adams would be saved.
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(Guys, don’t forget to comment and leave a review.
The next Chapter is going to be the final pov of Kynar Voss because I know I yapped so much.
I love albus camus, so I talked about the Sisyphus thing.
About absurdism, stoicism is the best way to know how to continue living.
Noah is a character from an old Chapter, if you remember.
The one Raul took his soul.
Anyways:
150 Power Stones=1 extra Chapter
1 Castle=2 extra Chapters)







