Forever Destined to the Silver Shadow-Chapter 194: I can’t give up on my desire

Aaron’s POV:

I parted away from her and laid beside her on the mattress once I sensed that she was satisfied. Even though I wasn’t entirely satisfied, I never push her more than she needs.

This is what love does to a person! When you are in love, you start to care more about your beloved than you care about yourself. You begin to get happiness by making them happy. You lose yourself slowly to them—still, you will love it.

Being a creature of lust by nature, all I knew was to get pleasure by sex and intoxicants. Who would have thought that falling in love gives the topmost pleasure?

Lilin was lying dazed beside me, and her gaze was upwards. I turned to her side and traced my finger over her blushy cheek. Sometimes I have trouble believing that a beautiful girl like her is actually the daughter of the cold queen Lilith.

"Aaron," she said and yanked my hand away from her face. "We need to talk—"

"Okay, then let’s talk."

"No, Aaron. I mean, I don’t want to see you anymore—"

Is she still foreplaying with me? I thought she was satiated! Perhaps I didn’t satisfy her enough.

I got up from the mattress and tried to get on top of her again. But she pushed me away and shouted out, "Aaron, when I said to you that I need to talk with you, then I just want to talk. I don’t want to see you anymore, and please get out of my room now before my mother sees you."

This is not foreplay anymore! She sounds serious. Is she really asking me to leave? Lilin got down from the mattress and put on her clothes back—while I was having a hard time believing what she just said.

"So you really don’t want to see me anymore?"

Lilin tied her long raven hair up in a bun and said, "No, I don’t."

I immediately jumped out of bed and went near her. I tried to touch her face, but she pushed back again.

"How many times should I have to tell you not to touch me? Now for the last time, I am instructing you—get the hell out of here."

"But, Lilin, I love you so much. And you love me too! How can you tell me to leave?"

"When did I tell you that I love you? I have never confessed my love to you, have I?"

Her response confused me. Just a while ago, she told me that she desires me. Then I realized that she just desires me! She has never actually told me that she loves me.

"No, Lilin," I shook my head. "You are just lying to yourself that you don’t love me. But in reality, you do love me. I am a predator, and I can sense everything that you feel."

"It doesn’t matter anymore what I feel," she sighed deeply. "Because even if I love you, then you can’t provide me true happiness."

What is she saying now? I never provide her happiness?!

"Lilin, why are you lying now? You know how much I do for you. Every time we are together, I make sure that the lusty monster in me doesn’t hurt you. You are happy with me and what we have is real."

"No," she raised her voice. Her face started turning scarlet slowly. "What we have is not real—and what you provide me is not real happiness. This is all lust and illusion, which is going to fade away eventually. Then you will get a new lover, and I will get another man too."

I was stunned by her statements. So is this what she thinks of me now? Very soon, sadness flooded my heart. She doesn’t acknowledge my love!

Perhaps if I tell her how much I mean to her, she might acknowledge me. I took a step near her and said," Please listen to me, Lilin! You have completely misunderstood me. I will never be able to love any other girl like you. You are the only one for me, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you in Ashland. I will be crowned as the King soon—and you should be my Queen. I don’t need anyone else other than you in that position."

Her jaw dropped after she heard my confession. Maybe she has finally acknowledged me! That is what I thought until she started to yell at me again.

"You stupid Incubus! How dare you say that you want me to become the Queen of lusty monsters? Did you think that I am a pathetic succubus girl from your land? I am the Demon Princess Lilin! I have the powers of the Anti-Angel. And still, you expect me to stay in Ashland with you forever and keep on sucking your—you know what ...."

Each of the words she said hit on me like a lightning bolt. Perhaps I have been not treating her the way she wants. Mistakenly, I thought that she liked to be in Ashland and become the Queen.

"I am sorry, Lilin," I apologized to her. " I never knew that you wanted different things than me."

Her anger diminished a little after she heard my apology. "Finally, you understand," she breathed out. "You need to know that I have a greater purpose to fulfill. If I keep on partying with you, then I will fail in fulfilling my purpose."

"I understand you, Lilin! And I am sorry again for suggesting you something like that."

"It is okay! Now put on your clothes, get out of here and never come back."

I tried to bend down and pick up the clothes. But my muscles defeated me! I can’t do something that I actually don’t want to do. I tend to follow my desires no matter what price I am obligated to pay for them.

I stood firmly in front of her and said," I am not going anywhere! I can’t give up on the things that I desire. So I will never leave you even if you tell me thousand times to do—"