Flip the Coin [BL]-Chapter 185. Homesick (by BoyWithUke)

Henry’s POV

I was left alone for two days in my cell, though they provided food and someone came to take my blood and urine. I constantly assured myself that Kenny would come any minute until I was brought back to the white room where my hand had been dissected.

"Mr. Devin. We had to take care of a few things, so only now are we coming to part two."

I was put back on the chair that reminded me of the one they used for death row candidates, just far more modern yet still not at all comfortable.

The doctor came with a big helmet that was full of wires and put it over my head.

"Now, I want you to just relax." He typed something into his computer after sending the guards out.

Hopefully, I’m not turning dumb because of this. Kenny wouldn’t like an overly dumb dog; a bit of dumbness he would probably be able to overlook.

The helmet turned warmer, and it started to emit a deep humming. It got higher and then deeper again, similar to a hearing test. Just that it was giving me goosebumps. Not because it was painful; it was rather comfortable.

The hair on my neck stood up, and I felt half asleep. Then I started to get hungry while pictures flashed before my eyes.

So hungry; hungry, hungry, hungry. So empty; empty, empty, empty.

I move through the wasteland until I feel a presence, a warm presence not far away.

Hungry and empty, I only now notice that I am also cold—so cold, cold, cold.

So hungry, so empty, so cold.

I move toward the warm presence, and when I see it, I come closer—closer, closer, closer.

Mhm, so satisfying, so filling, and so warm.

I love this home, yet just like the others, it starts to grow colder with each passing day until there is only a shell left.

I have to move, yet this shell wouldn’t allow me to leave, just like the other ones.

But I increasingly grow hungry, empty, and cold again.

I need to destroy this home to find a new one.

Destroy, destroy, destroy.

Only after it is destroyed am I free to move again.

Another presence exits the shell, but it is not what I am searching for.

Because it is also hungry, empty, and cold.

*******

"Mr. Devin."

I blinked a few times in a daze and saw the doctor snapping his fingers in front of my face.

"What did you experience?" He held the helmet, which he apparently had freed me from.

"Coziness. It felt good. A few pictures," I said, while thinking of what I had seen.

"What did you see?" Dr. Carell asked.

"Colors and figures." I lied. In truth, they were the memories of the shadow that had merged with me.

The shadows didn’t seem so evil anymore after I went through the experience of one of them. Aren’t they just like the wild animals in our world? Be angry all you want at the snake that poisoned you or the lion that ate you up, but they are also just looking out for themselves. You can’t stay angry if you look at it like that.

I suppressed a chuckle.

Dr. Carell typed on his computer for a long while before he came back and put the helmet on me again.

It grew warm again; there were sounds again, and I slipped into a relaxed state once more.

Something new is near, a presence that is dangerous. But it is not me who is in danger. So I continue to search for a little bit of food, a little bit of something to fill me, and a little bit of warmth.

A new nest.

Then there is so much warmth, so many presences coming from one place. So many homes, and as if lured to them, I move to them.

There I find a cozy little presence, and when it turns into an empty shell, I find another home. Never had I ever been so sated, full, and warm.

After living happily for some time, the homes become scarce and the cold presences increase.

So hungry; hungry, hungry, hungry. So empty; empty, empty, empty. So cold; cold, cold, cold.

A very long time later, I feel a special presence, and I move closer to it, as close as possible. But before I find it, I discovered another home. Yet this home is soon turning cold, faster than it usually would. 𝒻𝑟𝘦𝘦𝘸ℯ𝒷𝑛𝘰𝓋ℯ𝘭.𝘤𝘰𝘮

It freed me to search for the special presence again, and when I find it, a strange thought comes to my mind.

Something I had never even considered, had never been able to consider.

I can feel more than the hunger, the emptiness, and the coldness; I can feel that this presence will be the end of me.

I can feel more than hunger, emptiness, coldness, and that my end is near: the unwillingness to continue feeling hunger, emptiness, and coldness.

I can sense that this special presence is just like me.

I want to stay with this special presence.

I hope we can stay together, sated, filled, and warm.

Together, together, together.

***************

"Mr. Devin?"

The same scene from before, but this time I didn’t answer, still too lost in the feelings of my counterpart. I felt a connection to this counterpart that had come to me on its own, with its own free will, a connection that I had not felt before.

As if the merging had not fully happened back then, as if we were only clumsily brought together before, but now we were completely one.

Not through killing and plundering everything about the other, including every single experience and memory, but through a voluntary union.

Fine, my little shadow counterpart.

Let’s keep ourselves healthy and happy, how about it?

Not only my hand; I could feel the shadowy energy deep inside me, dancing and hugging each and every one of my cells.

If we want to be happy and healthy, then let’s start with this collar and this damn chair.

The shadowy smoke covered my whole body. And although I could feel that I wouldn’t be able to maintain this state for long, it was enough.

Kenny is taking too long, so let’s meet him halfway.

I felt the chair dissolving and stood up, the bindings and the collar falling from me like crumbs that were stroked away.

The doctor screamed and stumbled back in real fear while I took a few fast steps to the door to melt the lock so we could talk alone—just the two of us.

I couldn’t understand the doctor’s reaction and looked at my body wrapped in the shadowy smoke, finding it absolutely beautiful.

"Don’t insult my little shadow counterpart by looking so fearful." I hummed, watching as he crawled back until his back met the wall.

"HELP!"

Guards were trying to break into the room, but the door held them locked out just fine.

I crouched in front of the doctor and looked at his right hand.

"I really have to thank you for bringing me and my counterpart closer. Would you grant me the honor of shaking your hand?"

I grabbed his right hand and watched as it dissolved in a really beautiful way, which I only now felt able to appreciate fully.

The doctor blacked out, and I waited patiently for two seconds until I couldn’t wait anymore and slapped him awake, dissolving half of his face just as beautifully.

"Now, please tell me about the situation. Are the other survivors I brought to this world still here, or were they already brought out by Kenny? Where did you see him the last time, and how was he doing? Where is his counterpart?"

Knowing that I was so close to Kenny and our world, I started to feel fucking homesick.