Earning the Love of a Princess-Chapter 191: By My Side

28 February, 1361. Westerhaven Palace, Islia.

Camilla stormed into the presence chamber she shared with her infuriating husband, high heels clicking angrily against the stone floor.

She slammed the door closed behind her as hard as she could, hoping to find a tiny bit of satisfaction in the deafening crash. But even that bit of pleasure was denied to her by William, who was hot on her heels. He caught the door before it slammed shut, before closing and locking it behind him.

"Stop walking away from me!" William growled. "We have a matter to discuss."

Clicking her tongue in disgust, Camilla ignored him and sped towards the bedchamber, eager to not only slam the door but lock it behind her so she wouldn’t have to look at his flawless, stubborn face any longer.

William - the wily, heartless mind reader - realised what she was about to do because she heard him mutter, "Oh, hell no. I’m not being locked out of my own bedchamber!"

Before Camilla could slam shut the door behind her, he shoved it open and wedged his shoulder into the rapidly closing gap. He pushed his way into the bedchamber.

Camilla briefly wondered if she should shut herself in the dressing room, so she could avoid him. Unfortunately, that room had no lock on its door.

She was stuck facing her husband. There was only one thing left to do.

She grabbed a pear from the bowl of late winter fruits that sat on a nearby table, and hurled it as hard as she could at him to unleash her frustrations.

Camilla wasn’t sure what made William roar the most - being hit with a pear or knowing she deliberately chose that fruit to throw, because he loved pears so much.

She hurled a second pear at him. And a third.

"Goddamnit, woman! Are you fucking possessed?" William kept creeping closer to her between dodges. "How are you going to explain this mess to the maids?" He swept an arm to gesture at the bruised and smashed pears scattered across the room.

"Oh, now you care?" Camilla shrilled. "Now you suddenly care what the maids think about what they see going on in here? That makes for a pleasant change!"

"Admit it! You only destroyed all the pears because you know how much I like them!"

William was absolutely right but in her fury and pettiness, she wasn’t going to agree with him. "If you enjoy them so much, help yourself! Have another one, husband. Have two, in fact!" Camilla hurled the last two pears at him, evil glee filling her mind when one of them hit the side of William’s neck, then smashed.

"Ah! It’s sliding down my shirt!" William started desperately trying to stop chunks of fruit from being caught in his collar.

Camilla glanced sadly at the empty fruit bowl. Now what?

William looked at it too, before glowering at her again. "Well, I hope that was fucking worth it. Now that you’ve gotten that out of the way, we need to have a proper discussion."

"Why bother? I know how you like our discussions to run. Apparently, your role is to make the decisions and mine is to go along with them as if I agree. And I should smile for extra effect." Camilla replied tartly.

"I’m your husband and master!"

"Don’t pull the authority line on me now, William! Not if you want to have a proper conversation instead of having something made of glass thrown at you!"

"Why are you acting wild like this?" he yelled.

"Because you refuse to listen to my point of view!"

"I did listen!" William defended himself. "It just so happens that the king holds another point of view. And in case you missed it, he wears the crown around here, not you or I!"

"You didn’t even try to argue my case to him! You just stood there nodding and went along with what he said!" Camilla unfurled her hands, desperate with the urge to claw something. Perhaps her husband’s face would do.

William rolled his eyes impatiently. "Arguing with my uncle and going against his wishes? Yes, that often works out well for everyone! It’s not like I haven’t already defied him on account of you before!"

Camilla stopped for a moment to acknowledge the truth of his words.

"Listen to me." Willian tried to reason. "The king has ordered that we pay a visit to the Marquis of Niarnol without delay. You heard him say that he considers the visit a very important one."

Camilla wanted to snap back that if negotiations with the marquis were so important, then King Edward should be going himself instead of sending his nephew. However, she knew the king had been suffering from a lung ailment during winter. His doctors had advised him to avoid the wild, windy climate of the marquis’s vast lands.

"I have no issue with visiting the marquis. The king knows I’ll visit whatever lord or estate he wants me to, and do his bidding." she said a little more calmly. "But I don’t understand why he forbid us to bring our child along."

"Because the journey northeast is a hard one, almost impossible to be travelled safely by carriage. It would take us twice as long to reach our destination. Malcolm’s far better off heading to Magdaline along with his nurse and the rest of the court."

"But if we’re to be separated from him until we meet up with him at the castle..." Camilla scrambled to estimate how many days that would leave her without her son.

"If you and I depart in two days’ time, we’ll only be away from Malcolm for four weeks at most." William said.

Camilla felt like she was being stabbed in the heart. "Four weeks? William, he’s only a half year old! How am I supposed to be alright without my baby for that length of time?"

"And you think it’ll be easy for me?"

"Apparently so! You appear to be just fine with the arrangement." Camilla knew that was an unfair jab but couldn’t resist the temptation.

William’s eyes turned dark with temper. "That’s not true and you fucking know it. But the king has given his orders. We don’t have to like them but we must follow them."

Camilla turned and pressed her forehead against the cool, smooth stone of the wall. She tried to see the logic in William’s words - the two of them were duty bound, like any member of the royal family, to carry out diplomatic missions for the king. And she knew it was safer to keep baby Malcolm in the warmth and merriment of the court’s progress to Magdaline, than to drag him across unfamiliar terrain.

None of the logical thoughts eased the pinch of angry, helpless tears building in her throat.

Camilla turned around slowly to face William again. He was watching her warily, with a look that plainly said he’d prefer to be skinned alive than have to watch a female in tears.

She had a sudden idea. "What if, instead of both of us going-"

"No."

Camilla blinked. "I didn’t even finish explaining my suggestion!"

"And you don’t have to. I know what you’re about to ask and the answer is no." William replied flatly. "I’m not going on this visit without you."

"I hardly think the marquis will notice or needs-"

"I don’t give a fuck about the marquis’s needs. I only think of mine. And I need my wife by my side." William’s voice was rough as he stared at her. His eyes held the same intense possessiveness as they had in their first days together, edged with fear. 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝙚𝙬𝓮𝙗𝒏𝙤𝒗𝙚𝙡.𝒄𝒐𝓶

During a quarrel during when he’d first discovered her pregnancy, William had accused her of choosing her child over her husband. That had stung - Camilla had told him she loved them both equally and she’d meant it.

But wasn’t she choosing Malcolm over William by asking to be allowed to stay with the court during the northern progress?

Especially because if the roles were reversed, she knew William wouldn’t hesitate to stay with her.

She felt like she was being asked to tear her soul into half, and then decide which half should be burned to ashes.

"I’ll command you to my side if I have to, but I’d rather you came willingly." William muttered, staring down at his boots.

Camilla watched him, remembering the anguish of their months of separation during the war with Moraigth. How she’d sworn that if he’d tried to be a good father, she’d refuse to ever be separated from him again. And lord, the man had tried so hard.

Even though Camilla knew it went against every instinct he had, she’d seen William do his very best for their son every day. At first, he’d only done it to keep his word to her. But as the weeks had passed, she’d seen him become genuinely fond of Malcolm.

If he could fight his fears for her benefit, perhaps she could do the same for him?