Chapter 6: Taking a Break in the Village. What Kind of Meal Will I Get in This Medieval European-style World?

I ended up traveling together with the female knight Ilia toward her castle.

However, it was impossible to reach the castle before sunset, so we decided to spend the night in a village along the way. From what I heard, Ilia had come to exterminate orcs after receiving a request from this very village. Protecting the safety of her territory was the duty of Ilia, the lord and female knight.

She had only come to investigate after hearing reports of "orcs spotted in the distant forest," but she ended up running into a migrating horde of over a hundred orcs. Apparently, there were no past records of orcs migrating as an entire clan like this. It looked as if they were fleeing from some natural disaster or a massive threat. The direction Ilia pointed to when she said "The horde came from over there" matched exactly with the direction where Dragon God girl Lucia had transformed into a dragon and was humping a rock.

I doubt it, but... could the orcs have run away because a giant dragon suddenly appeared and started rock-humping? Come to think of it, the bowl-shaped stone I picked up to drink Lucia’s love juice didn’t really look like a natural object if I thought about it carefully — maybe it was actually an orc tool?

There’s no way to confirm it, so I’ll just forget about it. Even if I found out the truth, there’s no way I could tell Ilia something like "You almost got killed by an orc horde because of the Dragon God girl’s masturbation session."

The place we’re staying tonight is a simple one-story wooden hut that’s basically just a bedroom. The ceiling is so low that I can’t stand up straight and walk around. There are no windows in the walls, and since the sun has already set, the inside is extremely dark.

I bent down and entered through the small doorway, then propped up the wooden board that served as a door. There was no furniture at all — only a pile of straw that seemed to be meant as a makeshift bed in the corner.

It feels too modest to lend to a traveling lord, but this is probably a medieval fantasy-based world, so for a rural village hut, this might actually be considered high-class.

Ilia had introduced the unidentified me to the village chief as her attendant serving a knight.

As a result, I ended up spending the night alone with a girl who looked about high-school age.

Nice. Ufufu.

My heart was pounding...

Spending the night with the opposite sex was making me strangely excited.

Knock knock.

There was a sound from the door. Ilia had returned after receiving food from the village chief. Apparently, people in this area don’t usually eat dinner, but she had them prepare something because I said I was hungry.

Since the room was dark and cramped, I moved the door board aside and stepped outside.

Ilia, bathed in starlight, looked beautiful.

Her white dress had been in tatters, so I had given her my clothes before we arrived at the village. That’s why her outfit looked lame. But a beautiful woman looks beautiful no matter what she wears. Still, because it was just a normal shirt, the fabric hung straight down from the peaks of her breasts without forming any cleavage, and I couldn’t see the shape of her nipples. That part was disappointing.

Even so...

Just thinking that she was completely naked under that shirt made me get hard.

Right now, I was alone with a female knight wearing nothing but a shirt.

Maybe Ilia was thinking that her nipples were rubbing painfully against the inside of the shirt...?

If so, that would be pretty erotic...

By the way, in exchange for giving her my clothes, I had wrapped Ilia’s torn dress around my waist like a skirt. There was plenty of fabric, so my erect cock probably wasn’t visible from the outside.

"Masaharu. I got us some food."

"Thank you."

I wonder what kind of food she brought back.

In a medieval European-style fantasy village, it’s probably something like boiled beech leaves or rye porridge. In most web novels, even rural villages have bread and cheese, but that’s unrealistic.

Obviously, making bread requires milling tools or a windmill, and making cheese requires pastures to raise goats or cows. In a poor remote village without those things, bread and cheese shouldn’t exist. Yet in most web novels, even countryside villages live at the same level as fairly prosperous late-medieval towns.

Using hardened old bread as plates might give off a medieval fantasy vibe, but that was something only nobles or wealthy city dwellers in the later Middle Ages did. Besides, using bread as plates implies they have tables and are eating meat or sausages on top of them — which poor farmers could never afford. After using the bread as a plate, they would give the leftovers to servants or livestock, which basically means they were rich enough to employ servants.

Moreover, such records were left on valuable sheepskin parchment by wealthy families and nobles, which is why they survived to modern times. The daily lives of rural peasants were almost never recorded for posterity.

Plenty of actual plates and containers from that era have been discovered, and the residues stuck to them have been scientifically analyzed. That’s how modern science has determined when and where cheese was being eaten.

I once worked at a major fermented food company near my house, and they had a history museum inside the company building. Through employee training, I learned a lot about history. That’s why I’m quite knowledgeable about the history of fermented foods. When I used to write web novels, I always researched food thoroughly.

But there’s this thing called "image," you know?

For the sake of readability for readers, I put bread, cheese, and potatoes in my web novel and had farmers eat them. Then some idiot with ID: **** left a shitty comment saying "Potatoes didn’t exist in medieval Europe."

Complain about the horse carriage instead, you moron!

According to Wikipedia, nobles only started using horse carriages in the late 16th century!

More precisely, before the 16th century, riding in a carriage was considered shameful.

"Ehh, seriously? A carriage?!"

"Only sick people are allowed to ride in carriages~!"

"Gross~"

"Kyahahahahaha!"

In the Middle Ages, even female nobles rode horses by themselves. There’s tons of evidence left today — mounting steps in the corners of towns, riding manuals and etiquette books from the time, castle cities with streets too narrow for carriages, and even saddles integrated with dildos. There’s overwhelming proof that women rode horses. Yet everyone ignores that and puts carriages in every medieval fantasy story. A carriage isn’t just a convenient prop for a princess to get kidnapped by bandits!

Damn it. Should I use this knowledge to spread dildo-equipped saddles in this world?

I don’t know how to make mayonnaise or soap, but a dildo saddle is just combining existing things, so I could make it easily!

Don’t underestimate modern people. I’ll destroy the sexual morals of this entire world!

This is what knowledge cheating looks like!

"W-what’s wrong, Masaharu? You suddenly look so serious."

That’s right. I’ll develop Ilia’s asshole with a super thick dildo too!

I’ll violate her until the skin around her anus gets thick, then pull her rectum out and turn it into a beautiful anal rose.

Yes. I died while ejaculating to a video of a blonde girl licking mixed juices overflowing from a red-haired girl’s anal rose, then reincarnated in another world — so I have a strong connection to anal torment.

I’ve decided. I’m going to expand Ilia’s asshole until it’s so loose it interferes with her daily life! I’ll insert my cock into her anal rose!

Since Ilia is a weak-asshole female knight who climaxed from just one thrust, she definitely has the aptitude for anal development!

"Ilia. When I complete the anal expansion dildo, I’d really like you to test it out."

"Eh? Anal expansion...? What do you mean?"

"N-nothing!"

Oh no. I accidentally said what I was thinking out loud.

Luckily, Ilia doesn’t seem to know what "anal expansion" means.

Even though we had anal sex and a facial, Ilia and I aren’t dating, and we’re not in an anal development relationship. I need to stop blurting out my fantasies.

Calm down, my son.

"What’s wrong? Is it really nothing? You’re my savior. Don’t hold back."

Even if I’m her savior, there’s no way I can ask for that. Anal sex might have a slim chance, but turning her into an anal rose is impossible...!

"Ah, yes. It’s really nothing. I just remembered some unpleasant things from the past because I’m hungry..."

"I see... By the way, why do you sometimes switch to polite speech?"

I can’t exactly say it’s because I get more assertive when I’m erect.

"Never mind. Here, don’t hold back. Eat up."

"O-okay."

Ilia held something out to me.

Hm...?

It smells familiar.

It’s too dark to see clearly, but the thing on the wooden plate looks extremely familiar.

"What is this?"

"It’s a potito."

"...Eh?"

"You don’t know it? It’s a potito."

In other words, a potato.

Ilia had a proud look on her face as if saying "It’s delicious, try it. It’s amazing." Is this a specialty of her territory? She looks so confident. Damn it. If you act cocky, I’ll develop your asshole! You weak-asshole female knight! Let me lick your asshole! I was too desperate during the day, so I didn’t get to taste it properly.