Chapter 150: Chapter 150: Officer, It Really Wasn’t Me Who Beat Him Up

"I won’t let you villains, who dare desecrate the home of Lord Raccoon Cat, escape." But Sakai Kaori seemed completely oblivious to the danger. Instead of retreating, she advanced, her petite body slamming into Chen San’s chest. Using the momentum, she grabbed his right hand, hooked her right foot between his legs, and spun sharply, using his own forward force to fling him away. He crashed into Boss Song yet again.

It all happened in a flash. Before Shen Yibin, Sun Qian, and Sylvie could even blink, the two burly men had been taken down by Sakai Kaori.

"I’ll call the police."

"I’ll go down and help!" Sun Qian and Sylvie quickly divided the labor. Sun Qian, who was more familiar with the domestic situation, would dial Demon Demon Spirit, while Sylvie, with her military experience, would head downstairs to help subdue the two intruders.

"Hmph! Hmph!"

"Huh?"

"Thieves! We’ve got thieves!" The other creatures weren’t about to sit still. Cheeky shouted at the top of his lungs while Egg and Hah’Er charged excitedly toward the two burglars, as if they had just spotted some fun new toys.

’Ouch, this little lady really packs a punch!’ Chen San thought, rubbing his lower back as he struggled to get up. But before he could even sit up, he saw a black-and-white furball hurtling right at him.

It was Hah’Er, who had used its momentum from running down the stairs to leap into the air and present its rear end. Don’t be fooled by Hah’Er’s adorable appearance; it was, after all, an animal weighing several dozen pounds. The force of this sudden butt-slam was considerable. Chen San let out a pained shriek and found himself flat on his back for the third time.

Meanwhile, Boss Song was met with Egg’s assault. Egg might not have Hah’Er’s weight, but its attack was far more vicious. Its two paws clawed relentlessly at Boss Song’s face. Just as he raised a hand to fend it off, Egg sank its teeth into his wrist. Alas, whether he managed to escape or not, he was probably going to need a rabies shot.

’Fuck, whose dog is this? How did it get so fat?’ After being knocked down, Chen San instinctively moved to counterattack Hah’Er. But just as he raised his hand, he froze. At that moment, he finally got a clear look at his assailant.

’No way... It’s not a dog, it’s a panda?!’ If it had been a dog, Chen San would have risked a few retaliatory strikes. But he wouldn’t dare touch a panda. ’Getting caught by the police now would just be for burglary. But if I hit a panda and hurt it? How many years in prison would that be?’

In that brief moment of hesitation, Shen Yibin lunged forward, pinning Chen San’s hands to the floor. He’d been making an effort to work out recently, so he had at least this much strength.

"Hmm?" Hah’Er, completely oblivious to the fact that it had just avoided an attack, seemed to have found a new toy. It patted Chen San’s thick belly with a paw, then leaped up and slammed its butt down right onto his stomach.

"BLECH!" Chen San’s face instantly went pale, and he nearly threw up the late-night snack he had eaten earlier. ’Dammit!’ he thought. ’This panda looks so cute, so why is it so vicious?!’

’Heh, you had no idea, did you?’ Shen Yibin mused, starting to pity the poor bastard. ’Pandas are actually ferocious beasts. In the wild, a panda could kill a wolf with a few butt-slams like that. You’re getting off easy.’

"I surrender! I surrender! Stop, please stop, will you?!" A panda is a ferocious beast, but a raccoon cat is also a skilled predator. Over on the other side, Boss Song was about to burst into tears. His hands and face were covered in scratches from Egg. Any more of this and he’d be disfigured. ’I just wanted to steal a few things,’ he lamented internally. ’Did you really have to go this far?’

"Egg, Hah’Er, stop for now." Seeing that the two men had lost all will to fight back, Shen Yibin called out to stop the animals. If this kept up, the two poor sods were going to get seriously injured.

"Hmph?" Hah’Er was in the middle of having fun. Even after hearing Shen Yibin’s command, it insisted on giving Chen San a few more thumps with its big rear end before finally stopping. Egg was no different, landing a few more vicious swipes on Boss Song.

"Now, you two..." Shen Yibin had just started to question them when he heard the WEE-WOO WEE-WOO of police sirens outside. It seemed Sun Qian’s call had been effective; the police had arrived.

"Sun Qian, go meet the police. Sylvie, turn on the computer and pull up the surveillance footage." Shen Yibin and Sakai Kaori had to keep an eye on the two intruders... or more accurately, keep an eye on Hah’Er and Egg to stop them from further tormenting the two poor devils. So, these tasks had to be delegated to the two women.

Still in her pajamas, Sun Qian immediately switched on the lights by the shop’s entrance and loudly waved down the police car. "Officers, over here! I’m the one who called! We caught two burglars!"

Sylvie, meanwhile, went to the counter, turned on the computer, and brought up the indoor surveillance footage. This would all serve as evidence to convict the two burglars later.

"A break-in? At this shop?" When he first heard Sun Qian, the lead officer didn’t seem particularly concerned. But once he got a good look at the storefront, his expression darkened instantly. Shen Yibin’s shop was on the Yunzhong City Public Security Bureau’s radar; they all knew this was the store with the panda.

’Were the thieves here to steal the panda?’ The instant he considered this possibility, the officer’s concern for the case skyrocketed. "You caught the burglars?" the lead officer asked urgently. "What were they trying to steal? Is the panda hurt?"

"Yes, the burglars have been caught. I’m not sure what they were trying to steal. As for the panda..." Sun Qian turned her head to look inside. Hah’Er was completely fine, but the same couldn’t be said for the poor sod pinned beneath it. "Err, you’d better go in and see for yourselves."

"Huh? See for ourselves?" The lead officer immediately tensed up. ’It’s not injured, is it?’ He quickened his pace. "Let’s move, people! Faster!"

Following a frantic patter of footsteps, several officers rushed into the shop. Behind them, the police from the nearby security booth also came running over.

"Officer, these two pried open the lock, slipped into the store, and we caught them." It was only then that a wave of delayed fear washed over Shen Yibin. ’If Sakai Kaori hadn’t been sleeping downstairs, and if she wasn’t such a powerful fighter, who knows how tonight would have ended?’

Upon entering the shop, the police didn’t look at the two criminals first. Instead, their gaze immediately landed on Hah’Er. Seeing that Hah’Er was perfectly fine and full of energy, they collectively breathed a small sigh of relief. ’Thank god, the panda’s okay.’

"So, these are the two burglars..." The officer turned his head, then sucked in a sharp breath. "Jeez, don’t you think you guys were a bit too rough on them?"

’Officer, I swear I’m not the one who beat them up this badly!’ Shen Yibin’s head began to throb as he tried to figure out how he was going to explain all this.