The Amusing Adventures of a Directionally Challenged Dad and Daughter - Chapter 71: I remember your grand promises

The Gura Gura no Mi is known as the strongest fruit in the world of one piece.

A former sporting rifle shooter genius transforms into the ‘Juvenile Butcher’. While originally supposed to have received the death penalty, he was instead fortunate enough to have entered a secret and highly regarded armed force, throwing himself into the ‘Nirvana Project’.

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”

“I only want you, Theia. Always have always will and this shall never change. How could I ever want another when I possess the one I solely exist for?”“Phobos,” I call his name fondly a need to hug him and breathe in his calming scent surfaces.“I do not wish to treat you like you are made of glass because you aren't. Your body was made for me and it can handle everything I choose to give it. And this I will prove it to you.”“When?” I ask breathlessly as he ultimately turns around to meet my curious eyes. Golden rings outline his irises his beast announcing his presence and they stand as one before me. A wicked smile paints his face with a flash of canine displayed to me. A promise he gives that I will be ruthlessly devoured.“When I fuck you senseless.”~~~After years of excruciating loneliness, Phobos approached me. A frightening beast, my soulmate who emerged from within the bounds of a ruthless thundering storm. The male I yearned for. He caught me off guard and I was under the spell he cast through his ocean eyes. A spell I couldn't defeat and that very moment I knew I was in trouble. The second our eyes met I knew he would bring me endless heartache.We were childhood friends, him and I. Phobos the gentle and playful juvenile I grew up with and looked up to as a pup vanished and was replaced by a cold-hearted barbarian, he terrified me as he killed many with a blink of his eyes. No regret, no concern his beast often in control surging forward consuming his senses. They were equals.How can I connect with a beast like him? How could I make him call me his? How can I love my childhood friend who has become a merciless monster?