I Can Contract Beauties - Chapter 24: Sucked Dry

In an exhilarating twist of fate, Jiang Chen traverse into a fantasy realm novel he read, taking on the role of the notorious Holy Son in a riveting tale. But here’s the catch – he’s pegged as the female lead’s obedient doglicker. Or so the story initially wanted…Unleashing the ‘Slack Off System’, Jiang Chen flips the script! Each act of slacking off spectacularly rewards him. Doglicking duties? Jiang Chen smirks at the thought. “Not in a million realms,” he declares.As the system chimes melodically, rewards rain down like immortal gifts:Ding, for successfully slacking off, you receive: the Emperor Weapon, All-Heaven Mirror!’Ding, another round of slacking off earns you: the Immortal Technique, Great Daluo Heaven!’Ding, for successfully slacking off you received: Immortal Emperor Cultivation!’But wait, there’s a twist in the tale! The world around Jiang Chen starts to unravel in the most unexpected ways.The character settings of the female leads have all collapsed.Junior Sister Ye Qingcheng: ‘I can only repay your life-saving grace with my body!’Cold and aloof master: ‘Disciple, I allow you to defy your master.’

“If fate wants me to suffer, it should have picked someone else!” —Raven.Raven wakes up as the protagonist of his favorite novel. He knows the brutal storyline that makes grown men weep.The original protagonist endured it all, but Raven has no plans to play along.He has a system, but that broken thing has everything locked.He has knowledge of the plot, but no clue what twists the author hid beyond what he read.He has a choice to suffer like before or rewrite everything.The tragic twists? Fuck themThe heartbreaking losses? Skip themPointless sacrifices? Save themNo more misery for the sake of character growth.This time, he is writing his own legend and a story worth remembering!

Once, I really wanted to hang out at Hogwarts, living a life of eating and dying, picking up girls, provoking professors, and violating school rules to find excitement.

If you’re in a bad mood, beat Voldemort; if you’re in a good mood, beat Voldemort; if you’re in a bad mood, sorry, Voldemort, I’ll beat you anyway!

Dumbledore, do you need me to twist your nose back for you, although it will hurt a bit.

Professor Snape, you are a good person, um, I said this very seriously.

Others, don’t mind me summarizing you with an ellipsis?

………………

Later, I grew up…

Then, I can’t find a way back anymore…

I would like to write this article to commemorate me or our lost youth. I think of running under the sunset that day…

Produced by melon seeds, it is absolutely finished!

- Description from novelbuddy

【A new work from the author of 'Top Tier Providence, Secretly Cultivate for a Thousand Years'!】As a young servant, Gu An accidentally broke a pot containing a spiritual flower. While he was panicking, he discovered that he had absorbed twelve years of lifespan from it!Thus began Gu An’s journey to immortality.To cultivate safely, Gu An chose to become a servant disciple in the Taixuan Sect, where he planted medicinal herbs daily to consume their lifespan and enhance his own cultivation.He continuously evolved his basic skills with his evolution skill until they became divine abilities.Eras passed, stars shifted, and the world changed.Legends of immortals began to circulate.Gu An, now an immortal, spent half of his lifespan to push his cultivation beyond the limits of immortality and achieved the saint realm and stood above the heavenly Dao.However, one day, an old man in white robes, who looked like a true immortal, visited Gu An.“I am the Celestial Lord Xuanqing from the heavens. The Great Emperor Taihao has heard of your numerous good deeds in the mortal realm. You have repeatedly saved countless lives and have accrued great merits. He has specially dispatched me to invite you to join the ranks of immortals and assume the celestial position of Divine Steed Officer.”“Dare I ask, what the duties of the Divine Steed Officer arre?”“The Heavenly Court possesses divine horses capable of traversing heaven and earth and move between yin and yang. The Divine Steed Officer is responsible for overseeing and feeding these horses.”Hmm?