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... to a eager Hermione and Ron by his side, all three eagerly diving into its contents.

"Ms. Jian, purely in terms of writing style, it might not be your strong suit for book writing; it's a bit too straightforward... just kidding. I'd suggest starting from the perspective of the orphaned girl, unveiling layers of the past... As for weaving them together, maybe find an overarching theme for the story—Why does the mayor protect the commoners? Why is the boy content being an undercover agent? ...

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