The Royal Contract-Chapter 1232: Breaking her heart a hundred times

She watched the doubt in his eyes spread across his face. She could not help but wonder what he could be thinking. Did he understand that she was here to win him back?

Or was she too late?

But his silence told her that he was waiting for an explanation. She placed her hands inside her pants pockets as she looked down at the floor, afraid to gaze directly into his eyes.

"I want to..." Serena paused as she thought of all the lines she had rehearsed repeatedly in her head. "I am here because..." But the words seemed to jumble inside her head.

Frankly, the plan inside her head was so much easier when she thought about it. But now that she was face to face with him, with his eyes focused on her, she suddenly felt like melting on the floor.

"I know I am not making any sense." She began pacing the floor as she dug into her reasoning, hoping that she could finally explain herself.

"No, you are not." Adam furrowed his brows at her, seemingly confused by her actions, not making her task any easier.

"What I am saying is that." She ran a hand through her hair to get her bearing straight. "I am here to see you." She said, believing that she was making a fool of herself.

What was she thinking? Did she believe she could come here and beg him to take her back, and then everything would fall into place? Undoubtedly, such scenes could only happen in movies.

How could she assume he would suddenly forgive her for hurting him and cradle her back in his arms? She guessed, as usual, she selfishly thought that everyone would vow to her wishes because of who she was.

"Why?" It was one word, but it weighed heavily on her. She felt guilty for hurting him, making her want to sink into a hole where she could not hurt him again.

He did not deserve her. He was far better than the men that she associated with. Therefore, what was she doing, going after him? She would only end up hurting him again.

"Why are you here?" He asked as he came closer. "Why do you want to see me?" He only stopped when he was just a few feet away. frёewebnoѵēl.com

She had a simple answer to that question, but the words would not come out of her mouth. Her tongue seemed to go stiff while her lips refused to move.

"Serena, tell me." His voice was as calm as the wave splashing outside his room. She did not hear any accusation, blame, or anger in it. "Why did you come?"

This time, he stepped closer, blocking her from moving anywhere. She felt his hands enclosed on her shoulders, trapping her. She was not going anywhere.

"I think I made a mistake. Maybe I should not be here." Suddenly, doubt overcame her. She began to think that she should not have acted so impulsively.

"But you are here," Adam said with a definitive tone. "And you are not leaving until I get my answers." His grip on her was firm but not too tight.

She knew she could have effortlessly freed herself if she wanted to. But somehow, she believed she did not want to. Instead of being afraid, she felt safe.

She never sensed she was in danger in his arms. She knew he was not like the other men in her life. He would never hurt her.

"You said that I am the reason you left." His eyes bored into her as if he was digging for answers. "What do you mean by that?"

She knew what she meant by that when she said that to him. But was she ready to admit her reasons? But how long could she keep denying her feelings for him just because she was afraid of not being good enough for him?

"Yes..." She finally answered. "I left because things between us are getting complicated." She finally felt his grip loosened, setting her free.

She moved closer to the balcony looking over the beautiful view outside, but none of that scene mattered. Her mind was busy convincing herself that it was time to confess.

"And?" He seemed determined to get to the bottom of the issue as he followed and stood behind her.

She knew he was not looking at the beach or the stars because she could feel his eyes boring a hole in her back. He had his full attention concentrated on her.

"And I was afraid of what I felt for you." She finally admitted as she closed her eyes, remembering the first time she felt something for him.

"And now? How do you feel about me?" He asked, acting like a lawyer, asking questions like he was in a courtroom.

"I am terrified." She concluded and acknowledged her true feelings as she felt a shiver run through her spine.

"You know I will never hurt you." He responded, sounding surprised by her revelation.

Of course, that was not what she meant by her confession. "I know that." She clarified. "You meant so much to me that it frightens me to lose you."

Now, she finally said it.

"I never felt like this before. I thought I was in love with those men in my past, but nothing compared to what I felt for you." She continued as she wrapped her arms around her.

She was not cold, but she felt a chill graze her skin. "I was afraid of losing you when you were not even mine, to begin with." She knew that did not make sense, but that was what she experienced with him.

"But I wanted to be yours. I still do. So, what is the problem?" He moved closer until she could feel his warmth. But he never tried to touch her.

"I don't know if I will ever be good enough. You deserve a girl that you can be proud of. Maybe someone who did not have so much emotional baggage under her belt." She finally revealed her insecurity.

For someone who everyone thought had everything, she must be the most insecure person on the planet. She could act in front of the camera. But she was never confident about herself in the real world.

"But I don't want anyone else. I only want you." Eventually, she felt his hands glide across his arms until it wrapped around her body.

Then, the warmth of his body radiated across her back as he leaned closer. Nothing about his action terrified her. On the other hand, it made her feel protected. It was as if she belonged to be in that spot.

"Stop running, Serena. Stop fighting what you feel about me." He whispered in her ears. It was like the wind that touched her skin. It was soothing.

Truthfully, his voice eased her worries as it slowly drove them away. It made her believe he was right. It gave her the strength to face her fears.

"I love you, Serena." Then, her feet moved, turning her around until she faced him. "I love you. I love you. I love you, Serena. And I will keep saying it until you believe it." Adam repeatedly said.

In her heart, she already felt it long before he even said it out loud. But that was not the problem. She believed him, but she was afraid that it would not be enough.

"But I don't know if that is enough." She looked at him with so much doubt. "I had seen how my father loved

my mother, only to watch that love fade away."

Then, Elliot said he loved her. At first, she felt it, but that love had turned into an obsession that almost killed her. And so as the other men in her life that used love to play with her feelings.

Although she knew Adam was different from the guys in her life, she could not help but wonder if he would stick around when things got tough.

Her life had never been black and white. It was not easy or normal. There would always be something that would rock her world, one way or another. Would he be able to handle it?

"Serena, listen to me." Adam lifted his hand until it touched her chin, then he forced her to look at him. Once their eyes connected, he said something she believed had touched her soul.

"I am not perfect, and I will never claim to be. And so are you. I get that. But that is not what matters. I need you to understand that we will make mistakes.

We may suddenly find ourselves shouting at the top of our lungs as we argue about petty things. Or we can be floating on cloud nine as we celebrate an important event.

What I am trying to say is. As long as we are together, we can work on our issues. We can try to make things better. But we have to learn to trust one another. And most importantly, we have to take the risk.

I love you, and I believe you love me too. But that would mean nothing if you keep running." It was a long speech, but it said everything she needed to hear.

"I love you, Serena." He said again. "I will let you break my heart a hundred times if it means I will never lose you."

He was right again as she listened to his argument. She had to stop running. She believed he was also worth fighting for and breaking her heart a hundred times.