The Prince Wants to Assassinate Me Every Day-Chapter 952 - 536: Is It Truly Unable to Love, or Afraid to Fall in Love? (Part 1)
In the eyes of Gu Xingchuan and Xie Ruotong, there was a clear flash of surprise.
Even if they had prepared themselves mentally, they still couldn’t comprehend the world An Ning talked about.
"In my world, not only is everyone equal, but there are also many evolutionary advances through natural selection, as well as high-level inventions and research from human progress. For instance, my self-healing constitution, my extraordinary medical skills, and all the unusual traits you’ve seen in me," An Ning tried to explain clearly. "Of course, that world isn’t as perfect as I make it sound. Humanity is on the brink of extinction, suffering is everywhere, and survival isn’t easy. I became Ye Qichi because in a fight with a zombie, I accidentally got my neck bitten off by one."
"Becoming Ye Qichi was unexpected, but with a resigned attitude, I wanted to live well. The reason I’ve been helping Xiao Jinxing seize power is not because I love him. After all, I’m not Ye Qichi; I’m An Ning. The only person I love is my fiancé, Fu Xingyi. I help him just for my own protection and for the sake of the Ye Family, as a form of repayment for Ye Qichi’s body." An Ning tried to express her thoughts concisely.
"So you’ve never had any feelings for the emperor from the start, and you’re helping him selflessly just for yourself and your family?!" Xie Ruotong was somewhat incredulous.
No matter how many times An Ning expressed her lack of feelings for the emperor, even though Xie Ruotong saw that An Ning seemingly had no feelings for him either, deep down, she still thought perhaps it was because An Ning had been hurt by the emperor too much. She lacked the confidence to trust and accept him, forcing herself to feel nothing for him.
Only at this moment did she truly believe that An Ning really did not love the emperor.
Not only does she not love him, but she also has someone she truly loves.
"Does the emperor know?" Xie Ruotong couldn’t help but ask.
"He knows," An Ning had said, "To get Xiao Jinxing to let me leave the Imperial Palace, I told him."
"But does he believe it?" Xie Ruotong suddenly felt a bit sorry for the emperor.
Has the emperor been indulging in unrequited love all these years?!
"He seems to half believe it," An Ning sneered. "It doesn’t matter; to Xiao Jinxing, he only cares about what he wants. He doesn’t actually care who I am."
"That’s also why you keep saying you want to leave," Xie Ruotong summarized.
After all, if you don’t love him, you won’t force yourself to live with that person for a lifetime.
Moreover, An Ning’s so-called other world, a world of equality, finally made her understand why An Ning so desperately sought freedom, wanted to travel the world freely and unrestrained.
In her life, she could not accept so-called imperial supremacy, could not accept the ranking of people into different classes!
"Yes," An Ning nodded.
"But how can you leave? You just said, the emperor doesn’t care who you are, he cares about the fact that he loves you. If he doesn’t let you go, how would you leave? There’s nowhere you can escape his grasp," Xie Ruotong said with concern.
"I have a six-month agreement with Xiao Jinxing," An Ning didn’t hide it from them, "Xiao Jinxing promised me that after six months, he’d let me leave the Imperial Palace."
Xie Ruotong was surprised again.
Didn’t you just say that the emperor only cares about himself?!
Why did he make such a promise to An Ning?!
"Do you trust him?" Gu Xingchuan suddenly spoke.
He had been silent all this time, quietly listening to the conversation between An Ning and Xie Ruotong.
At this moment, he suddenly asked An Ning deeply.
An Ning pressed her lips together.
To be honest, she didn’t know.
She didn’t know whether to trust or not to trust.
She couldn’t make up her mind.
But no matter what, she would definitely leave.
She would seize any opportunity to leave.
An Ning didn’t answer, and Gu Xingchuan didn’t press for an answer.
He probably guessed that she didn’t really have an exact answer either.
Gu Xingchuan asked again, "The person you love is named Fu Xingyi?"
"Yes," An Ning nodded, "So it’s not Xiao Jinxing, and it’s not you. Don’t think you’re incapable of protecting me, and don’t have any hope for me. The only person I’ll ever love in this life is Fu Xingyi. Without Fu Xingyi, I’d only live for myself."
"Is that so?" Gu Xingchuan seemed to smile.
Amidst his smile, there was a hint of melancholy.
An Ning saw this clearly but didn’t intend to soften her heart.
The only thing she could tell Gu Xingchuan was that she didn’t love Xiao Jinxing, so he shouldn’t think of himself as inferior to Xiao Jinxing.
She only wouldn’t fall in love with anyone else because she already had someone she loved.
At least it brought balance to Gu Xingchuan.
"Yes," An Ning gave a firm answer.
"But..."
Gu Xingchuan’s words were left unsaid.
But.
I’m willing to live for you!
He had never loved anyone.
Once in love, it would be for a lifetime.
An Ning felt she had made everything clear, patting Gu Xingchuan on the shoulder, "So don’t wallow in self-pity. I’m not as great as you think, and I don’t love you. It’s not worth you neglecting your own well-being or loving me like this."
"Hmm," Gu Xingchuan responded.
He appeared to accept everything An Ning had said.
But in fact.
An Ning, do you know?!
Your deliberate attempt to clarify the relationship between us just showed more of your kind heart.
You might not even realize.
You’re actually much softer than you think.
This is true for him.
And for many others... it is also true.
...
When An Ning and Xie Ruotong left the Ancient Medical Hall, it was already afternoon.
To An Ning,
Gu Xingchuan was still a friend.
A very important friend.
So it was rare to leave the palace, and she would spend as much time with him as possible.
After leaving the Ancient Medical Hall,
the two of them didn’t take a carriage but strolled along the streets of Xun’an City.
Xie Ruotong said, "I feel like you told Gu Xingchuan so much today, but he may not truly let go of you, just like even after you laid it all out with the emperor, he still hasn’t let go."
"At least this way, I feel a bit better," An Ning knew as well, making someone truly forget another person is not such an easy task.
To this day, she hasn’t forgotten Fu Xingyi.
As long as there’s even a small emotional trigger.
Fu Xingyi would automatically pop into her mind.
"An Ning..." Xie Ruotong called her.
As if there was something she wanted to say.
"Hmm?" An Ning turned back to look at her.
Xie Ruotong hesitated whether to speak or not.
"Speak, I don’t mind," An Ning smiled.
"I’m not worried about offending you," Xie Ruotong explained.
She truly treated An Ning as a friend.
Hadn’t thought about those hierarchies at all.
She was just afraid that speaking up might affect An Ning’s understanding of her own emotions?!
And she suddenly got a jolt of realization.
In that instant, an idea popped into her head.
She wondered, was An Ning’s rejection of both the emperor and Gu Xingchuan truly because she couldn’t love, or because she was afraid to fall in love?!
