The Mob Character Who Woke Up!-Chapter 63: Lord Jason! (2)

"Now now now, we do not laugh at persons who are less fortunate than us. That is very bad behavior that I cannot tolerate. We do not need that kind of negative energy in our group."

Lord Jason spoke calmly but confidently with this fake concerned expression, which made Kaizen want to violently puke all over his expensive shoes and then maybe set them on fire.

Anybody with working ears and half a brain could tell this bastard was faking his concern like a bad actor in a terrible play.

But as always happens in these situations like some kind of rehearsed theater production, the two girls along with the two boys who had been snickering while looking at Kaizen menacingly just dropped dramatically to the ground.

"..."

The sus guy definitely was incredibly sus because the way he dropped to his knees was way too quick and way too practiced, like he had done this exact motion a hundred times before for some mysterious activity that Kaizen really did not want to know about and would probably require therapy to forget.

They all said in perfect unison like they had rehearsed this exact scene multiple times.

"We apologize deeply for our terrible behavior, our lord! Please kill us for this shameful display! We have brought great sorrow to your noble heart and deserve death!"

"Our lord is this incredibly benevolent angel and here we were trying to act high and mighty towards a pathetic little creature like this boy who is clearly beneath us!"

’Little boy! What the hell did I even do to deserve this, you stupid jackasses!’

’What is this?! What the actual hell is this cult-like behavior!’

The academy literally just started today, the welcome presentation was only two days ago, and in that tiny span of time this guy somehow made these people into his personal slaves who worshiped the ground he walked on?!

’What kind of black magic sorcery is this! Does he have a mind control spell or something!’

Compared to this so called accomplished Lord Jason, Kaizen had actually achieved way more impressive things if you really thought about it.

He literally had the most powerful first year student as his best friendo, plus a genuine demon king candidate as his roommate who could probably destroy a city. What else could he possibly need to prove himself to these losers?

A shiver suddenly ran down his spine as he quickly shook his head to clear the dangerous thought.

’I should not think about Leo and Klaus right now because they could literally appear from the nearby river like flying fish if I jinx it by thinking about them too hard!’

"Now now now, there is absolutely no need for any death here. In fact, I personally dislike deaths very much because they are messy and inconvenient. And I have already forgiven all of you for those harsh words because I am just that magnanimous."

Lord Jason paused for dramatic effect while the goons looked up at him with worshipful eyes.

"It is only natural to make rude comments when you see someone who is obviously an ugly duckling. But the key is we do not say those thoughts out loud where they can hear us, alright? Just keep those honest observations inside your heart where they belong."

Lord Jason spoke with such an elegant and refined tone that Kaizen was apparently the only person in the entire group who actually understood what this fake bastard just said with his backhanded compliment.

’Ugly! This pure looking dog poop licking elf just called me ugly to my face! Hmpfff, I will definitely have my revenge on this pretty boy even if it takes years!’

Kaizen had been absolutely right about everything he thought regarding this high and mighty elf, except maybe for the beauty part and the wig part, but he was still pretty sure those were also true if you looked closely enough.

’It is definitely a wig! I am saying it is a wig and he must be secretly using girls makeup products to appear like this perfect angel!’

’Hmpfff! A real man looks like me, rough and natural and authentic without any fake enhancements.’

’Hmpfff, so what if random people would scale me a one out of ten on attractiveness, but if you use Flamingo’s mana theory and do some subtracting and adding and multiplying and use advanced mathematics and integration with at least five variables, I should actually be a solid nine point nine nine nine!’

’Hmpfff, yeah, that is absolutely right and nobody can tell me otherwise!’

His eyes suddenly darkened while thinking about how to properly extract revenge from this smug bastard and his gaze accidentally fell onto the sus banana peel that the sus guy had thrown at his face earlier.

Then a sinister smile slowly broke across his lips as a plan formed in his devious mind.

...

With a renewed smile that absolutely did not reflect the complete emotional massacre that had just occurred inside his chest cavity, Kaizen finally reached up and accepted the hand that had been hovering in front of him for far longer than what was socially reasonable or comfortable for any human being.

It was honestly impressive dedication to the theatrical arts.

Lord Jason had kept that hand extended like a museum statue, clearly unwilling to retract it because that would imply rejection.

And rejection absolutely did not look good on a man who probably moisturized his face twice a day minimum and definitely slept on silk pillowcases while listening to whale songs.

Kaizen respected the commitment to maintaining character.

He also respected the golden opportunity that was presenting itself on a silver platter.

While Lord Jason was politely turning around to reprimand his loyal dickriding committee with calm, diplomatic words about kindness and decorum and not being complete assholes in public, Kaizen made a subtle executive decision that would fundamentally change the course of history. 𝕗𝐫𝚎𝗲𝘄𝐞𝕓𝐧𝕠𝘃𝕖𝐥.𝐜𝚘𝚖

He discreetly spat into his own palm.

Not dramatically like some cartoon villain cackling in the shadows.

Not theatrically with sound effects and announcements.

Just enough moisture to make things interesting, which was too much since Kaizen was petty!

A quiet, slimy investment in petty justice.

Then, with an angelic expression plastered on his face that would make cherubs jealous and a voice absolutely dipped in syrup, Kaizen said in his sweetest tone that made his throat hurt,

"Th..."