The Dreamer's Epilogue-Chapter 30: Resolve
Chapter 30 – Resolve
Océane sat at the edge of her bed, the room too high and too big because of the large size of the Ape Tribe.
She felt weird. She had always lived in a cramped apartment alongside her brother where there was not enough space to walk side by side.
Things changed so much. So fast.
Her golden eyes were focused on the shriveled picture inside her hand, looking with a fond but forlorn smile at the grinning expression of her brother.
He was truly dead.
That thought, until now, made her heart shatter every time.
It was strange, truly, to realize that she would never see him again. That she would no longer laugh with him, play with him, or even curse and be mad at each other.
It was no longer possible. All because death took him away in such a cruel way.
Did he deserve it? Noah was a simple handicapped young man who wished nothing but to stop being a burden to her.
However...
’You were never a burden.’ Océane’s breathing constricted, ’I was. I was the one depending on you to not give up, to not shatter.’
Noah never gave up. In so many ways, her little brother was stronger than her.
Océane’s golden eyes shimmered with restrained tears. Emrys was right. We never forget.
We only learn to live with it.
’Max and Emmie.’ Océane’s eyes went immediately cold, ’If...if they didn’t betray me, maybe...just maybe I would have had the time to save Noah.’
Yes, it was just a maybe. But that maybe was enough reason for Océane to hold an unhealthy amount of hatred and anger towards them.
And now that she knew that they were here too, in a tribe not far from here thanks to that disgusting rat, her mind was thinking of so many ways to make them pay.
’I don’t forget. I don’t forgive.’
Not anymore.
’I will uphold justice for myself for I know none will do it for me.’
She didn’t want to taint Emrys. If she could, she would kill all his enemies and let him pure and innocent. He...he was like a brother to her. And this time, at least, she would play her role correctly.
Océane thought about these again and again, repeating in unending spirals all to not think too deeply of Emrys.
It was easy to think about Noah. He was dead, and that was it.
But Emrys? Thinking about him required her to doubt whether he was alive or dead; whether he was here in the same zone test or not and so on.
It was heavy, and it was better to not know for now. Because with her passive skill, Heart of a Killer, Océane didn’t want to lose the last bit of self-control and sanity she was clinging onto desperately.
If that happened, Mat would not wake up tomorrow.
’Not the time yet.’ She whispered, trying to convince herself, her heart cold and dead beside a flicker of fire that represented Emrys.
She fell on the bed, her back slamming against the hard surface.
The picture of Noah disappeared from her hand, going back to the inventory.
Next she used her GeumGeum, channeling it to activate her skill.
Using her blood control, she slowed the activity inside her brain, trying to fall asleep, not realizing the level of control she just displayed for a novice all to sleep easier.
Tomorrow or after tomorrow would be a big day. And she could feel it, everything was going to change.
The different factions now had a bit of understanding of the situation.
Water and food were scarce, for all of them. And the only way to get it was either to attack other tribes or find another source.
And thanks to the ridiculously high charisma of Princess Naja — until now, Océane felt goosebumps about her — they managed to have answers from one of the whiteblooded bats.
’Whiteblooded Bats and Steeled Lizards, and the river...Lokuru River.’
The end of this tutorial floor lay there. After all, if all the enemies were killed...
’...why wait 7 days?’
Océane smiled emptily before finally slipping into the dream realm. But her dream was weird.
There was only blood, daggers and death.
Two Gates stood in front of her, looming ahead menacingly — one pure immaculate black, with withered dried crimson-black flies buzzing around it; the other one bright crimson, with daggers painted on it.
Each Gate called out to her, summoning a very distinct part of her. However Océane knew she must choose only one of them.
But which one?
Océane de Campbell had no idea.
...
Simultaneously, Emrys was lying down on his bed, his eyelids heavy, begging to be closed to sleep.
He refused.
Not yet, at least. He still had things to think about, without taking into account his fear of entering the dream of another.
He had learned a new aspect of his Gift today, and Emrys felt fear about it now that he was alone, with his own thoughts and emotions.
Losing himself was the last thing he wished to do, and it was clearly the path he was walking if he didn’t find a solution.
The core of the issue was the act of killing. And Emrys didn’t need to think hard and far. He immediately vowed to himself to never kill by himself.
’There must be a way to win without killing.’ He thought, clenching his head, ’and even if there is none, I will find it.’
He had no other choice.
But that was not all, for even without killing, with him entering the dreams of others...he would lose himself sooner or later.
’How in the hell am I supposed to do this?’
Emrys thought bitterly, desperate, finding no current way out of this situation. The only thing he could do was to constantly strengthen his link with his most precious memories in order to not forget them.
But for how long until everything collapsed? He felt like he was in complete darkness so thick he felt suffocated.
All of this was still new to him. And each time Emrys felt like he was not meant to survive this new reality...his mind always summoned his dearest memories:
His stern but gentle father, his stepmother who always tried hard to be there for him like a real mother would, and even his friend Ravin who would give him phone numbers of girls without him asking...
He missed that guy, and prayed that he was alive. He needed to be alive.
It was mainly thanks to all of them Emrys refused to let himself go.
’I just need to search. I will find a way. I promise it.’
To him, and to them.
There was a saving grace in all this, and it was that Emrys was not new to this type of thing. He had lived all his life with his schizophrenia, bearing inside his head voices and thoughts that were not his.
He knew, with certainty, that if one could live with the memories of others inside his head without losing himself...it would be him.
It was the same problem, just the scale was now bigger.
However, he would do it.
Doubtlessly.
Ultimately, Emrys failed to stop his exhausted mind from shutting down.
He slipped into the dream realm, but there was nothing there for him except absolute darkness.
It was strange, chilling even.
But a dreamless dream was better than intruding into other people’s dreams.
So Emrys Frost slept, and he dreamed nothing but nothingness.
—End of Chapter 30—
