The Archduke's Songbird-Chapter 124: Aggravated Guilt
The horse got closer to her accepting her, making her heart overflow.
"And I promise I won’t leave you again." She spoke; the words were a vow, spoken with a conviction that resonated deeply within her. She knew that they both needed this reunion, a chance to heal and to move forward together.
"Once you get better, you can stay with her..." Jerrick said, walking up to the horse.
Jessamyn took a step back from the horse. He was full of vigor even though his appearance didn’t match what he used to be. Jessamyn had a good feeling that it wouldn’t be long before Jostein would be back.
Her eyes then ended on Jerrick who was gently stroking Jostein’s mane. She realized how much he valued her feelings. He knew that Joar’s horse was more than just an animal; he was a living connection to a lost loved one, a vessel of memories.
Jessamyn once again noticed that Jerrick only had kind words to say about Joar, while she found herself unable to say anything good about Imogen—the woman she had grown up with. Imogen had never shown any redeeming qualities in her interactions with Jessamyn, but a pang of guilt still pricked her heart for not even attempting to offer a single kind word about Imogen to Jerrick.
She realized with a start that, for some reason, she wanted to erase Imogen’s memory from his heart completely. Perhaps it was jealousy or the deep-seated pain of betrayal, and the sufferings she endured because of Imogen. She might have been nice to Jerrick. But...the thought of Jerrick cherishing any part of Imogen stung.
Despite everything, Jerrick remained unfailingly gracious and compassionate, even when it came to Joar. His ability to maintain such magnanimity made Jessamyn feel small by comparison. She knew she harbored bitterness and resentment, whereas Jerrick seemed to rise above his past grievances with a grace she couldn’t muster.
Jerrick might have betrayed her in the past, but his capacity for forgiveness and kindness proved he was a better person than she was. This realization brought a heavy sadness to her heart, mingled with a reluctant admiration for him.
By taking care of Jostein, Jerrick was honoring Joar’s legacy and showing his deep respect for her pain. It consoled her and the knots of doubt and misunderstandings she had in her heart slowly loosened.
Jerrick didn’t have to go that far, and yet he did. Lately, he showed up for her, proving his words with unwavering actions. His consistent support bewildered her, leaving her both comforted and deeply unsettled.
She welcomed his newfound dedication, but it also stirred a deep sense of dread in her heart. If his actions were part of an effort to win her over, she feared how easily she might fall for him again. The passion she once felt for Jerrick was deeply rooted, and despite the pain and loss she had endured, it wouldn’t take much for those feelings to resurface.
Yet, this possibility brought with it a wave of confusion. Was it right for her to let go of Joar’s memory and accept Jerrick as her husband? Could she honor Joar while opening her heart to Jerrick once more? Should she plead with Jerrick once more to stop the wedding?
The conflicting emotions left her torn. Her mind was a whirlwind of doubt and uncertainty, grappling with the question of whether she could truly move forward without betraying the past.
Once again, tiredness fell over her allowing her to not think about anything. Even speaking drained her energy and she didn’t bother to listen to anything around her.
She watched as Jerrick talked to the physician about taking care of Jostein’s health. He knew better about horses and what Jostein might need better than she might ever need. Jerrick’s concern for Jostein was not superficial as she observed. He genuinely wanted for him to get better. 𝘧𝘳𝘦ℯ𝓌𝘦𝒷𝘯𝑜𝑣𝘦𝓁.𝒸𝘰𝓂
Watching him interact with Jostein reminded her of the times he nurtured Jaylene. He had a genuine care for animals that even they could understand. At times she even had wondered if he could understand animals and in turn getting understood.
He was someone who knew the bowel movements of his horse, after all!
After saying a temporary goodbye to Jostein, they left the rehabilitation center for horses.
"Let’s find you some medicine," she insisted, pointing at his shoulder.
Jerrick shook his head and patted the injured area. "It doesn’t hurt. It’s fine, Jessamyn. You’re not a rabid dog. I’ll be alright."
Jessamyn felt a pang of guilt and shame. He dismissed her concerns so easily, insisting that she hadn’t harmed him, yet she knew she had acted out of anger and desperation. The usual playful smirk was absent from his face, replaced by a serious, earnest expression. She had no choice but to believe him.
"It might leave a scar if you’re not treated immediately," she argued, trying to reason with him.
He shrugged it off nonchalantly, but her worry persisted. She knew he was proficient in medicine and could tend to his wound, but the sight of his injury troubled her deeply. Her gaze drifted to his leg, still perplexed by why he had allowed his bones to set wrongly.
Why would he hurt himself deliberately? Why is he insisting on this wedding?
She remembered how Joar prepared his will diligently before he fell sick. He worked day and night to ensure that she would be taken care of in her absence. It was as if he knew that he had little time left and that he needed to secure her future before he ran out of time.
What is his reason?
Jessamyn’s palms went cold as she considered it from that perspective. She was not left to her thoughts for long, however, as she heard the guttural laments of women echoing in front of the imposing edifice of the Divine Judiciary Council. The building stood high above the others in the area, a testament to its authority and sanctity.
Typically, the Divine Judiciary Council dealt with spiritual matters, crimes of blasphemy, disputes among the priests, and issues of that sort. However, the crowd gathered there today seemed different. Jessamyn noticed some guild members among the crowd, their voices rising in protest.
Jerrick, sensing her unease, held her hand and led her towards the commotion. As they approached, the chaotic scene unfolded before them—faces contorted with grief and anger, hands raised in desperate pleas. It was clear that something significant and troubling had occurred, drawing even the usually reserved guild members into the fray.
Jessamyn’s heart pounded with a mix of curiosity and dread as they moved closer to the source of the uproar, each step bringing them deeper into the emotional commotion.
