The Archduke's Songbird-Chapter 119: The Hug

"Heh!" Jessamyn scoffed, a bitter laugh escaping her lips. The true Jerrick had emerged the instant she mentioned Imogen.

How was it fair that he could dictate her words, forbidding any mention of his late wife? He could endlessly cherish Imogen’s memory, nurturing it tenderly in his heart, yet she was expected to erase every trace of her own husband.

Where was the justice in that? How could he wield such control over her life?

"Jessamyn..." Jerrick took a deep breath, striving for calm. 𝙛𝓻𝒆𝓮𝒘𝙚𝙗𝒏𝙤𝙫𝓮𝒍.𝓬𝒐𝙢

Since William had revealed Jessamyn’s hatred for Imogen, a raw nerve was struck each time she uttered the name. He couldn’t bear the thought of Jessamyn despising Imogen, yet it was painfully clear she did.

This helplessness festered into anger, an anger he knew wouldn’t aid Jessamyn now, and so he restrained it.

"Do not come closer!" Jessamyn covered her face with her forearms. She didn’t want to look at him.

"I won’t come closer to you. Tell me what else you need, Jessamyn..." he asked, calmly stepping back.

He heard every word that woman said, each one a dagger to his heart. She blamed everything she had done to Jessamyn on her past relationship with him.

The thought that he was the cause of her suffering in her marital home, the reason she lost her son, tore at his soul.

Not only had he failed to be there for her during her struggles in her paternal home, but she had also endured torment in her marital home because of the lingering shadow of their past.

He was the source of all her anguish. No wonder she hated him.

Jessamyn heard the tenderness in his tone and that only enraged her more. "What are you trying to do? Are you patronizing me? Do you want to act caring to make me fall in your arms? Was that your plan all along?" Jessamyn looked at him.

Jerrick let out a deep sigh. She was acting out in pain and his heart got shredded to pieces. He couldn’t hide the pain in his eyes.

"Looking at you...I..." she spit out those words venomously, her entire body cringing in disgust. "Whenever you touch me, my skin crawls; I feel like a thousand worms creeping on me. I do not want to look at your face. I do not want to be near you. I hate you with all my heart."

Jerrick stood in front of her, clearly affected by her words, but held fast as he didn’t want to leave her alone. "I won’t get near you. Come, eat something..."

His calm demeanor only angered her further. "You want to act noble now, huh? So, what? Just because you pretend to care for me, should I leap into your arms, dropping every feeling in my heart? Is that what Imogen asked you to do? Is that why you killed my husband?" she asked next.

Jerrick staggered back, each word piercing his heart like a blade. The pain was almost unbearable.

When Hector announced his engagement to Jessamyn a week after Jerrick’s own wedding, a crushing sense of loss engulfed him. He felt he had lost her forever, yet he was relieved, believing she would be well cared for in his absence.

Jerrick had known about Hector’s feelings for Jessamyn long before he joined the military. Hector had even attempted to sneak into Beaumont Castle a few times, attempts Jerrick had thwarted to protect Jessamyn.

Jerrick had always believed that if anyone could love Jessamyn as she deserved, it was Hector. So, he wished her nothing but happiness in her married life. From afar, he watched over her, content to see her smile and be held in Hector’s loving embrace. He was jealous, yes, but more than that, he was genuinely happy for her. His only desire was to see her truly happy, her heart full of joy.

Never once did he wish for her happiness to be shattered.

The accusation that he had poisoned her husband hit him like a thunderbolt. How could she believe such a thing of him? Did she really think he was capable of such heartless cruelty, of destroying the happiness he had always yearned for her to have?

His every action had been aimed at protecting her from the dangers foretold by the seer. True, his efforts had brought unintended harm, a realization that now tortured him, but he had acted out of love and concern, not malice.

Her harsh accusation, that he had murdered her husband, was almost too much to bear. How could she so easily see him as a heartless killer, someone who would go to such lengths to extinguish her happiness?

Jessamyn saw the man in front of him, shrinking in pain. She could see his face getting pale as if he got hit in the head with a thunderbolt. His fingers trembled as he tried to reach out her hand.

She knew he was in pain. She understood that it was her words that caused him the pain. His reaction gave her a clear-cut answer to the question that was nagging her heart for a long time.

He had nothing to do with Joar’s death.

But the hurt she had caused him was undeniable, and she felt lost on how to mend it. The usual pain she shared with him was no more.

She felt numb.

"I’ll go..." she murmured, turning away.

She needed to escape, to be anywhere but there. Overwhelmed by distress, her thoughts were a chaotic whirlwind. She didn’t want to lash out or act irrationally anymore.

The man standing before her had been the source of immense anguish, yet she knew he was not the true cause of her suffering. Since they had reconnected, his actions had been marked by a genuine concern for her well-being and a sincere effort to support her family.

Despite the pain he had unintentionally caused, his intentions seemed rooted in care.

As Jessamyn looked at him, she felt a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. The betrayal she once felt was now interwoven with an undeniable recognition of his efforts to make amends. His eyes, filled with a mixture of sorrow and earnestness, spoke volumes of his regret and his desire to protect her.

She understood that, whatever his past mistakes, she needed his help for the sake of her brother’s safety. This realization brought with it a heavy burden: she would have to navigate their relationship with utmost caution. Trusting him blindly was not an option, but neither was shutting him out completely. She needed to be vigilant, to act with prudence and strategic foresight.

She couldn’t break everything off and leave as much as she wanted to. The Council wanted the marriage to happen. She needed to put her feelings on the back burner.

She needed solitude to process everything, to find some semblance of peace amidst the turmoil.

She only took one step before she was held in a bear hug.