Sleeping With The CEO-Chapter 284: Missing In Places

Going into the third week without Emily as his personal assistant. Derek could well and truly say that he was not okay at all. It was eating at him, missing her made even worse by the fact that he could not even tell anyone that he was missing Emily.

As far as the rest of the world was concerned. Emily Molson had just been Derek Haven’s PA, and upon her departure she had been replaced by yet another PA. One employee replaced by another new employee. That was all it was to them.

Derek wanted to scream at all of them, to tell them how wrong they were.

It had not just been replacing one PA with another. Derek had lost a piece of himself.

He and Emily had been together for so long, first as boss and personal assistant, and then as girlfriend and boyfriend, that he had no idea how to function without her by his side.

Sometimes when the insomnia got too much and Derek began to hallucinate.He would look into a mirror, and swear that there were actual chunks missing from him. Blackholes all over his body.

All of the areas that Emily used to fill with just her presence alone, left empty. But then Derek would blink, look over at himself again, and he would see nothing but whole flesh, his skin unblemished. The well-polished facade that he presented to the world staring back at him.

The Derek Haven that almost everyone wanted to be.

From an early age Derek had always known that people envied him. That they wanted what he had, the money, the power, the status. Things that had been his from birth simply because of the name that came after his first name.

For the longest time Derek had been proud of that fact, and also proud of his own accomplishments. Things that he had managed to achieve without relying on the family name. But now, Derek had no idea what had happened to that man. That Derek Haven had been so well put together, in control of his own world.

Rushing forward and meeting his destiny halfway. Not unsure of himself and not backing down from anything.

In contrast, Derek now felt like an imposter. There was no other way for him to explain it, other than that he felt as though he were missing pieces of himself.

Like when Emily had left, she had not just gone on her own. That the two of them had gotten so close to one another. So intermingled, that when she had left him, she had ripped out pieces of him.

Taking them with her when she disappeared from his life.

That was the best way he could think to describe the hollow place that now existed where his heart used to be. An emptiness that now stared back at him in his own eyes when he looked at his reflection.

He was missing in places. That was what it was. When Emily had left, she had taken pieces of Derek with her, and he had no idea how to get them back. Or if he would even be able to get them back. freёweɓnovel_com

Ever since he had realized that those parts were missing. Derek had tried his best to cover it up.

He practiced his smiles in front of the mirror, not to manipulate or cheat anyone like others in the industry had been known to do. But as a way to try and convince others, especially his mother, that he was doing fine.

He often spent time in front of the mirror.

Tilting his head this way and that, his teeth showing. All in an effort to try and figure out an angle that would make not only his eyes light up, but his smile seem more natural. Looking at his fake smile in the mirror, Derek was never sure that it worked.

But it seemed that the rest of the world believed him. They bought the smiles. But even though he could fool others. Derek could not lie to himself. Sometimes late at night, with only the darkness for company and the cool waters of the pool holding him up.

He would admit the truth to himself. A truth that he felt was shameful given how they had parted, and that truth was that, even after everything...Derek missed Emily.

She no longer cared about him, but that was her. As much as Derek wished that he could turn his emotions on and off like they were a faucet. That was not how they worked. Just because on her end, Emily had been able to cut everything off. It did not mean that he himself, had been able to do the same.

He missed her and he still loved her. It was shameful to still be pining over somebody who had tossed him aside like a piece of trash, but Derek could not help it.

Even as the days, and nights dragged on and his heart continued to hurt like it was being prodded with a hot poker. Derek could not make himself change. He missed her and he loved her.

If by some miracle he were to find a genie in a magic bottle. Derek’s wish would be to see Emily again.

Not to try and force her to be with him, but to just observe her from a distance.To make sure that she was alright, that she was doing good. His happiness might no longer be a priority for her. But for Derek, her happiness would always come first to him. And now, Emily had decided that in order to be happy, she did not need Derek in her life.

Something that Derek knew she really had to mean because in leaving him, she had chosen a life of nightmares. Just as he was now stuck in a life with no sleep.

You did not leave somebody who gave you the type of reprieve that they had given each other.

Unless you really meant it.

So that meant Emily was serious. She no longer cared about him. Derek wished he could do the same. But he was beginning to feel as though he would never stop loving her.

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