Re:life with Karmic Gacha (Modern Family)-Chapter 346 : Hawaii (Part 2)

-Timeskip Chapter-

[General POV]

Ted, Phil, and Jay gathered for a toned-down bachelor party, indulging in steak, scotch, and cigars.

"Ted, how are you coping with all the traveling?" Phil asked, concern evident in his voice.

"Geez, can't we just drink and smoke in silence? Why do you have to ruin the mood with small talk?" Jay grumbled.

If Phil had asked about the best moments of traveling, Jay might have been more receptive. It was clear that the travel was taxing for Ted, and Phil's concern was heartfelt.

Putting his scotch down, Ted stared into his glass and said, "Honestly, I'm barely keeping it together."

"Is it really that tough?" Phil pressed, intrigued. Jay rolled his eyes, finishing his drink, and almost stood up when Ted said, "To start off, something weird happened to me in Japan."

Jay immediately sat back down, realizing this wasn't the emotionally vulnerable sharing he dreaded.

"Something weird?" Phil asked, leaning in with interest.

"More like horrifying," Ted replied, his complexion paling. "I went to a Japanese bar and ordered some udon. While eating, I suddenly felt... strange."

"Food poisoning?" Jay guessed. Ted shook his head.

"No, not that. It felt like something was wiggling inside me—mostly in my liver."

"Then my entire body burned up. I had to take off my clothes. And then I saw it—my entire right stomach... it disappeared."

"WHAT?!" both Phil and Jay exclaimed, shock etched on their faces.

"My skin cracked, and I almost fainted. I ended up collapsing at the toilet."

"That sounds like food poisoning or maybe hallucinations. Did you eat something weird, like pufferfish?" Jay suggested, visibly nervous.

Ted replied, "I wish it was food poisoning. I woke up in the hospital, and the doctor told me I was fine. Too fine..."

"Why do you say 'too fine' so ominously?" Phil asked, anxiety creeping in.

"Like, perfectly healthy. Even my liver... the cirrhosis damage... it's gone." Both Phil and Jay shuddered at Ted's revelation.

"I thought maybe there was something wrong with the restaurant, so I went back the next day. But the place had been closed... for 40 years."

"STOP! I'm getting married tomorrow! I can't handle this right now!" Phil shouted, fear evident in his eyes.

Jay, however, had a different reaction. "You went to a restaurant in Japan, got healthier after that, and you're worried? Send me the address! I need to go there too."

Jay's father had died at the same age he was now, 63. After receiving a wake-up call about his health, he was anxious and determined to live a healthier lifestyle to spend more time with his goddess-like wife.

"I can do that," Ted smirked. "Though, I don't think the restaurant will open its doors to you."

"Why not?" Jay retorted, annoyed.

"I think the only reason I stumbled upon that restaurant is because of Edward," Ted replied, pride evident in his tone.

He hadn't realized that the chef at the restaurant was his own son. Edward had used his Stand, Pearl Jam, to heal Ted's ailment, choosing to disguise himself to shield his father from the horrifying experience.

"He did a lot of good work—helped many people, sponsored orphanages, fought off the yakuza, uprooted corruption... I think I'm healed because of Edward's positive karma."

If Edward heard his father's words, he would definitely flinch. Ted continued sharing stories of their travels, filled with both good and bad experiences.

Finally, the moment of the bachelor party arrived. Phil turned to Jay, determination in his eyes.

"Jay—Mr. Dunphy, I want to ask for your blessing to marry your daughter!" Phil requested earnestly.

Jay was taken aback, then felt a mischievous spark. "Well, after 17 years, now you finally want my blessing? I'm not giving it to you!"

"WHAT?!" Phil slumped, dejected.

...

"What's up with him?" Alex asked, eyeing her despondent father at the ceremony venue the next day.

Haley shrugged. "I don't care. How do I look?"

"Nauseating," Alex scoffed.

Haley wore a green dress with a daring neckline, her hair styled in an elegant bun. She completed the look with large earrings and high heels to accentuate her figure.

Alex wore a similar dress but felt it was dull in comparison.

Edward entered the venue, his presence commanding attention. He approached Phil with a playful smile. "I heard you couldn't get Jay's blessing. Should we cancel the marriage renewal and get a divorce instead?"

"Heck no! I'm marrying Claire no matter what!" Phil said instinctively, then paused as he realized the hidden meaning behind Edward's words.

Edward smirked. "Good! Because if Claire's single, I'm snatching her up immediately. So be warned!"

"I'll never divorce her!" Phil declared, determination shining in his eyes. Suddenly, he smiled and asked, "Are you going to sing to bless us today?"

"Of course! I'm not letting anyone else perform today. Only me! I'll even play the violin to accompany the bride as she walks down the aisle."

Phil grinned and said, "I'm looking forward to it. Oh, yeah. How much should I pay you for it?"

"I'll give you a discount. Give me everything in your savings account and we'll call it even."

"EVERYTHING?!" Phil was shocked to hear Edward's performance rate.

"Just kidding. Right, Gifts. I have prepared a gift for your wedding. It's not extravagant, but I hope you– as an early tech adopter, will enjoy it."

Mikasa approached them and handed Phil a bag. With a star in his eyes, Phil peeked inside the bag . Alex and Luke got curious so they went to see it too.

"Is this... Phones?" Phil breathed heavily, his finger shivered slightly as he took out the boxes from his hand.

"I'm launching a new line of smartphones. Well, it's a short term thing. I just can't wait for technology to catch up." Edward sighed wearily.

Alex was thoroughly flabbergasted as she observed Edward's casual reaction to his endeavor.

[Alex's commentary]

"Why is he trying to play it off like he's being forced to do it? HUH?!" Alex exclaimed, irritation evident in her voice. "I've seen the specs! The entire world will take at least a decade to catch up to him!"

"I feel bad for Apple. They're really proud of their latest product, and it's selling well, too," Alex sighed, holding her forehead with a pitying expression for the company.

[Commentary ends]

"Harmonics? Why did you pick that name?" Alex asked, jumping into the conversation.

Edward shook his head pitifully and said, "I wanted to call it 'Pear,' but the company wouldn't let me."

"Please don't fixate on that name anymore, sir. It's best to forget it forever," Mikasa chimed in, disdain visible on her face.

Edward ignored her and continued, "So they decided to pick the name that suits me best. There are going to be three models: Adagio, Legato, and Crescendo. Adagio is more for leisure, so the price will be under 200 bucks. Legato is for people who want something more. And Crescendo will be the climax—I mean, the peak of the tech. I'm giving you five Crescendo units so everyone in your family can have one."

Phil breathed heavily, his voice turning raspy. "How about the specs? Can you tell me about them?"

"Sure! Let's start with the basic Adagio: a 50-megapixel camera, 48 hours of battery life with fast charging capability—you can get to a full charge in 20 minutes."

Edward continued without noticing Phil's dazed eyes.

"Snapdragon chipsets offer advanced multi-core performance, AI capabilities, and quantum connectivity, vastly outperforming the single-core Apple A4 chipset that's just been released. As soon as this comes out, Apple will feel ancient. Should I elaborate more?"

A little taken aback by Phil's stoic reaction, Edward nervously waved his hand in front of Phil's face.

"Oh no. He's dead," Alex remarked flatly.

When Edward sold his brand in September after the initial marketing, the entire world would be in an uproar to get one of those phones, especially since they knew Edward only had 50 million units available.

Alex pulled Edward aside while Luke took one of the phone boxes. That snapped Phil out of his stupor, and he snatched it back from Luke. "No! Don't open it now. We'll have to film an unboxing for these!"

"But if I boot it up now, I can take pictures of the wedding. We didn't have a photographer, right?" Luke begged.

There were still half an hour until the wedding. At this time, Claire was getting her hair and makeup done by a team of professionals.

Claire flipped a document; the nervousness of a first-time bride walking down the aisle wasn't evident on her face. She turned to Frankie and said in shock, "Is he crazy? He's buying that much land? Is it necessary? The current building capacity can still support the company's growth."

"Not for the next two years. Edward's thinking about the future, so he's going to build a new company campus. It's going to be split into two locations: one in Silicon Valley and one in... that's a secret for now."

"A secret even from me? I'm the VP of Logistics!" Claire was flabbergasted.

"Please don't move; you're making our job harder," the makeup team begged politely.

"Ah, sorry about that," Claire apologized and kept still, only moving her mouth for conversation.

"Did you see that article? Edward is likely to enter the Forbes 100 list next year."

Frankie nodded and said, "Yeah. But the main question is, what will his ranking be?"

Outside the wedding venue, Phil felt a bit dejected, even though everything was going well. Ted noticed and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Ah, since the wedding renewal is becoming more real, I'm regretting not including my dad and my mom in this," Phil replied, a tinge of sadness in his tone.

Ted snorted and said, "About that..."

Phil suddenly heard his dad's voice coming from afar. He looked at Ted in shock.

Ted smirked and said, "As the best man, do you really think I wouldn't have your dad at your own wedding?"

Phil hugged Ted before running to his parents. Edward saw this and a sincere smile bloomed on his face. But he soon turned shocked when he saw Phil's mother.

"Betty White? Oh my god..."

...

Edward played his violin to create the atmosphere. Everyone had gathered inside the hotel wedding hall, waiting for the bride to enter. They were having an outdoor wedding facing the ocean, which provided a beautiful backdrop for the ceremony.

"Looks like I finally get to walk you down the aisle," Jay said proudly as he escorted Claire to Phil, who was waiting at the end of the aisle. A Hawaiian priest had been hired to officiate the wedding.

"We're here today to celebrate the renewing of the marriage vows... of Phil and Claire. On this day, they've chosen to reaffirm their love for each other..."

The ceremony continued with Phil and Claire exchanging vows. Edward felt satisfied as he managed to witness this special moment. Then, they exchanged rings.

"You may kiss your bride."

Claire wrapped her arm around Phil as he leaned in to kiss her.

"I present to you, still as husband and wife, Mr. and Mrs. Dunphy."

Everyone cheered as the officiant finished the ceremony. Edward, Haley, and Luke took pictures, with Haley's photos turning out the best. Her dad even decided to print out the renewal ceremony picture from Haley's collection.

They moved to the gazebo for lunch, and while everyone was eating, Edward walked onto the stage.

"Hello, everyone. This morning, I heard an interesting story from my dad, which inspired me to finish this song. I hope everyone enjoys it," he said, full of sincerity.

Edward sat atop a stool, holding a guitar and lowering the microphone to his position.

"Is it about the bride and groom?" Phil asked excitedly while everyone jeered at him.

Edward shook his head and said, "No. It's about the groom and the father-in-law."

"What?!" Jay was shocked to hear the answer. Edward didn't wait long and began to play a melodious tune on his guitar.

[Rude– Magic]

He crooned with a charming expression, swooning even the waitress who's handing out the food.

"♫♪ Saturday mornin', jumped out of bed...And put on my best suit ♫♪"

"♫♪ Got in my car and raced like a jet... All the way to you ♫♪"

"♫♪ Knocked on your door with heart in my hand... To ask you a question ♫♪"

"♫♪ 'Cause I know that you're an old fashioned man...♫♪"

Edward looked at Phil and Jay, smirking as he sang.

"♫♪ Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know ♫♪"

"♫♪ You say I'll never get your blessin' 'til the day I die. "Tough luck, my friend, but the answer is no" ♫♪"

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Mitchell realized something and said, "Wait a minute. He didn't give Claire and Phil a blessing, even though they were in a fully committed heterosexual relationship?"

"Imagine if we're the ones asking." Cam finished Mitchell's thoughts. Jay felt that his conscience was pricked, and he was a bit irritated. He only wanted to tease Phil, but now he was put on the spot with the song.

"♫♪ Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway ♫♪"

"♫♪ Marry that girl... marry her anyway... Marry that girl. Yeah, no matter what you say. Marry that girl and we'll be a family ♫♪"

Haley chuckled and said, "No wonder he's singing this one. It really suits mom and dad's story doesn't it?"

Alex nodded in agreement and said, "Definitely."

Edward's angelic voice mesmerized the audience, "♫♪ Why you gotta be so rude? ♫♪"

Frank Dunphy tapped Phil's shoulder, "He is incredible. I've never seen your mother smile like this."

Edward winked at Grace Dunphy who he thought looked like Betty White. The elderly lady was smitten with Edward instantly.

"♫♪ I hate to do this, you leave no choice. Can't live without her♫♪"

"♫♪Love me or hate me, we will be both...Standin' at that alter♫♪"

"♫♪ Or we will run away. To another galaxy, you know. You know she's in love with me. She will go anywhere I go♫♪"

Cam recorded the performance with his digital camera, but Luke used the new phone, which allowed for a better quality video.

"♫♪ Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?

Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know

You say I'll never get your blessin' 'tll the day I die

"Tough luck, my friend, 'cause the answer's still no" ♫♪"

Jay finally sighed and told Phil, "I already gave you my blessing 17 years ago."

Phil grinned and said, "Really? I'm really touched, Jay!"

"Don't cry! You're making me want to take that back!" Jay retorted,

"♫♪ Why you gotta be so rude?

Don't you know I'm human too?

Why you gotta be so rude?

I'm gonna marry her anyway ♫♪"

"♫♪ Marry that girl marry her anyway

Marry that girl no matter what you say

Marry that girl and we'll be a family

Why you gotta be so rude?♫♪"

"♫♪ Rude♫♪"

Edward picked the guitar skillfully, which enchanted the audience with his skills. He smiled and sang cheerfully.

"♫♪ Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?

Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know

You say I'll never get your blessin' 'til the day I die

"Tough luck, my friend, but no still means no" ♫♪"

"♫♪ Why you gotta be so rude?

Don't you know I'm human too?

Why you gotta be so rude?

I'm gonna marry her anyway ♫♪"

Everyone clapped rhythmically as they followed the song beats. The other guests from the hotel peeked at the gazebo as they too was infatuated with the performance.

"♫♪ Marry that girl !marry her anyway!

Marry that girl ! no matter what you say!

Marry that girl! and we'll be a family!

Why you gotta be so rude?♫♪"

"♫♪ Oh, yeah, oh

Why you gotta be so rude? ♫♪"

"♫♪ Why? Why you gotta be so rude? ♫♪"

Everyone cheered as the song ended. Claire rushed to the stage and gave Edward a bear hug.

The celebration continued, and Edward slowly excused himself from the wedding, only to be caught by Haley at the door.

"Are you already leaving now?" she asked, a bit worried.

Edward smiled and said, "I stole some time to attend the wedding, but I have a lot of work to do. I actually need to go to Africa right now."

"Oh." Haley exclaimed disappointedly. "I thought you're going to stay longer. I still haven't been able to talk with you.N–Not just me, Alex too."

They fell into an awkward silence before Edward said, "I'd seen your videos. It's very entertaining."

Haley had launched her own Entertain video channel in February where she shared fashion tips to her fans. Her subscriber count grew larger and larger everyday, already surpassing the 1 million subscriber mark.

"You're watching my videos?" Haley was surprised as she didn't think he would have the time.

Edward grinned and said, "Of course I am. I'm also quite intrigued. Never once did you bow slightly on camera and show your cleavage, but your channel are growing really fast."

Haley was irked and said, "What did you say?! I'm not going to prostitute myself online!"

"Then you better make sure you end the recording after your live show. I had to intervene everytime." He teased.

Haley was speechless. Annoyed, she puffed her cheeks sulkily and said, "The camera will stop recording when I go to a different tab!"

"Yeah, it doesn't work that way. Thank god Robin noticed it." Edward teased again.

They argued for a while, with Edward even delaying his flight by an hour because of her. He was caught by the other family members and was forced to say a proper goodbye to them before leaving for Africa.