On The Other Side: I Quit Being Human-Chapter 20 Change (End)
I stare at the grin on Millonia's face silently, and ponder to myself. 'Am I afraid of her? No, but I'm afraid of what she will do to me.' I stare at my hands, but find that they are not trembling. 'Then, what am I actually feeling now?'
I clench and unclench my first for a couple of of times, before covering my right eye with my right fist. Gazing at Millonia with my left eye, I don't actually know what kind of face I am making.
"Hoh? That expression... That's good."
I can see her smirking, but I don't know her reason nor do I care about it. Something is filling my chest, and it is full of it. 'I have had this feeling before, but why am I having it now?'
I don't like the weirdly familiar feeling—I know what it means, but I don't know why it occurs to me now. Despite how much I don't like the feeling is however, it keeps filling up my chest, overwhelming me with an unbearable desire to wreak havoc.
"I am... Angry? Why?" I am hit by the puzzlement of the development, and my sudden change of mood. 'Why? Why does looking at Millonia's face irritate me so much? I am a weak person—I shouldn't be able to...'
Just right before I point out to myself that I, as a weakling, have no right to be mad at the stronger people because it's my fault for being weak, I realized something.
"Regardless of one's status, everyone has the same right to be angry..."
I clench my right fist that iscovering my right eye tighter, and look at Millonia madly. A grin slowly creeps on my face as I think about the treatment I have gotten ever since arriving here.
"That face—that shouldn't belong to a human... However, I like it when men make such a face. They are more fun to break."
Millonia is grining from ear to ear, which doesn't suit her beautiful face at all. For some reason though, like her, I am getting more excited upon seeing that expression on her face.
I am extremely surprised by it, but I do agree with her thought: someone who has that kind of a face on them is more fun to break. By the time I know it, I am already laughing, and my left hand has quickly picked up my short sword from the ground.
"I almost killed those bastards, but I failed because I was summoned here." I put my right fist down, and grasp the hilt of the short sword instead. "I am a Demon King Candidate, but I am treated like shit."
"Demon King Candidate? You?"
I ignore the bewilderment on Millonia's face, and grasp my short sword tighter. Imagining the maneuvers those game characters I played do, I kick the ground and dash at her.
Am I good at fight? Absolutely not. Do I have prior knowledge of any kind of martial art? Not at all. Have I ever won a fight? Beating is all I have gotten. Can I land a blow on Millonia? No, but I'm determined to hurt her.
"I have almost died twice, but none of you thought it was a serious matter—I am extremely pissed!" Letting out a warcry, I swing my short sword at Millonia.
Clank!
For the first time, I can face someone head on. Although Millonia easily deflects my sword to the point of making my hands numb, the indignation overwhelming me forces my body to keep moving.
"Twice—I have seen my abdomen being opened twice! I have seen bitches played with my innards twice! I can't accept it!"
"Then, what about doing something about that?!"
"That's why I am going to kill you, bitch!" My vision darkens at Millonia's response, and I know it's not because a lack of blood—I can't hold my rage back any longer.
Clank!
Judging by the sound alone, I am sure I have put a stronger power in my swing this time. My hands became numb, and I am sure they are already bleeding, but I became even more excited for reasons I don't know.
"Good swing, Layland! You have a good form too!"
Is Millonia mocking me? Frankly speaking, I don't know; I am just following the movement of some of the Knight game characters I played. To say that I imitate the moves splendidly will be a stretch, but I don't feel awkward doing it.
We trade blows for a couple of times, before I suddenly lose my grip of my short sword. Millonia immediately kicks me in the chest, throwing me to the ground.
"Fuck!" I already know my fate, and I am pissed because I can do nothing about it. My short sword didn't fall far away from me, but the state of my hands leaves me helpless. "How are they easily broken?!"
I have always blamed the world for every bad thing happened to me, but this time, I blame myself—I blame myself for not changing the way everything is going.
'The bullying too—if only I had stoop up for myself, things maybe different. It wouldn't immediately stop, but things would definitely change. If only I didn't always blame the world...!' With this train of thought, my mind easily reaches a conclusion.
"I need to change."
I haven't bled that much yet, but my vision is already dark; it feels like I am looking through a veil of black mist. Despite so, I can still see Millonia's figure clearly as I glare at her in madness.
Millonia scoffs, then smirks at me. "I have said it before, but I'll say it again: I like you, Layland." Pointing her sword at my chest, she stabs it into my chest. "I'll make it less painful for you this time."
"..." 𝒇𝔯e𝚎𝘄𝑒𝑏𝙣𝑜𝚟𝗲𝑙.c𝘰𝚖
As she said, it is less painful than before, but I still can't help screaming painfully—or, at least, try to. Her Spell is still in effect, and I can only let out meaningless breath from my mouth that doesn't convey my pain, even in the least bit.
My body is bathed in my blood as my vision grows even darker than it already is, and my head turns lighter in each passing second. The moment when I feel my body turns cold, I feel a prick on my hand, before falling to the back.
Thud!
At this point, I can barely see anything, but I still lift my right hand and position it above my eyes, so I can see what is happening to it.
"As I expected, I change everytime I die."
It is very faint, but I can see the Demon King's Mark on my hand is pumping something through my vein. I believe it is the reason why I suddenly become even more unfazed with getting injuries or the thought of death each time I wake up.
An amused chuckle comes out of my mouth. "Haha. I am not surprised if this accursed symbol can brainwash me."
With that, I lose my consciousness.
...
I am already awake, but I don't immediately move. My right hand is covering my eyes, and my mind is still occupied with thought of what will happen to me in the future.
"Now that I think about it, what is my real motive of getting stronger? Getting revenge on those bastards? Is it really just that? That's shallow—so unlike me ... What will I do after I have my revenge?"
Despite knowing how broken the perks those bastards got from the god of this world, though embarrassing to say this, I am sure I can fuck them badly. I am not predicting—I am going to make it happen.
"Instead of thinking about that, why don't you organize yourself first? Do you think as a weakling you have the right to think about that?"
"No, I don't think so, but it doesn't hurt thinking about the future."
"Hmph! Future won't come if you fail here."
I lift my hand off my eyes, and sit myself up. Looking at Millonia, who is sitting on the ground not far away from me, with a quirked eyebrow, I return her snort with my own.
"Hmph! Who says I will fail here? Beware of your word, bitch!"
"Hoh? I thought you just called me that because of your anger. It seems I was wrong; you do really hate me."
Standing up, I pick my short sword, and pat the dirt off my butt. "I just hate bitches in general. Don't make it sound as if you are special, bitch."
Millonia quirks her eyebrow in, what I can say, astonishment and confusion, before slapping her thigh with a grin in the next moment. Also standing up, she points her sword at me and giggles.
"You have changed, and I like you even more. Make sure to not cry like a baby this time."
"Thank you for liking me, but I don't like bitches."
Grasping the hilt of my short sword tighter, I notice my grip on it has become slightly stronger than before.
'Change, huh?' Imagining the stance of one of the game characters I played, I imitate it with my body. 'I might not be myself anymore, but that's the point of changing—it's something I want to happen.'
I kick the ground, and dash at Millonia.
Clank!
Our sword clashes for the first time in the third round, and this time, the numbness on my hands is not as bad as our previous clash.