My Stepbrother, My Enemy {BL}-Chapter 165: Keeping It Buried

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Adrien’s eyes held mine for just a beat longer than needed, his jaw set tight, with an intensity in his gaze that felt like a storm brewing inside him. For a brief moment, I thought he might break the silence, maybe offer some more explanation for the kiss, take it back, acknowledge it, or even pretend it never happened at all. His lips parted slightly, then pressed together again, and whatever he was about to say just faded away between us.

The silence was heavy and awkward, and I found myself hating how loud my own breathing was. My thoughts were a jumbled mess, and when I finally tried to speak, nothing came out at first. I was so scared that if I opened my mouth, I’d say the wrong thing...something I couldn’t unsay, something that would shatter the fragile balance we’d just found.

It seemed like Adrien made a decision for both of us then.

"You should go," he said quietly, his tone firm but not harsh. He didn’t look at me while he spoke; his gaze was fixed somewhere over my shoulder. "Your Golden Boy’s waiting. He’s probably worried sick."

I nodded, swallowing hard, even though my chest felt oddly tight. "Adrien, I—"

Before I could finish, he shook his head, cutting me off. "Just... go, Noah."

Then he turned away, walking down the hallway with long strides, purposeful and deliberate. I watched him disappear into his room, the door slamming shut behind him with a sharp bang that echoed through the corridor. The sound made me flinch, my heart racing, and it may have taken me months to come to the realization that, sometimes he wasn’t mad at me at all.

He was mad at himself.

For a moment, I stood there frozen, trying to catch my breath while my heart thudded in my ears. My cheeks were still warm, my lips tingling in a way I didn’t want to dwell on, and my emotions were such a mess that I couldn’t tell where one feeling ended and another began.

Fear, confusion, gratitude, and something dangerously close to longing all swirled together until I felt dizzy again.

Did I long for Adrien? How can I want someone when I was in love with someone else?

I slowly reached for the tray Mrs. Milton had left behind, my fingers trembling as I picked it up. The porcelain cup rattled softly against the saucer, that gentle clink bringing me back to the present, reminding me where I was and what I needed to do next. I took a deep breath, the warm, calming scent of the tea filling my lungs, and forced myself to move.

As I made my way down the hallway, each step slow and cautious, I couldn’t shake the thoughts replaying in my head, Adrien’s conflicted look, the way his hands had felt steady on my face, and how he’d pulled away as if scared of what might happen if he didn’t. Nothing felt straightforward anymore, and the answers I craved only opened the door to more questions.

By the time I reached the end of the corridor, my heart had settled into a nervous, uneven rhythm, but I squared my shoulders anyway. Ethan was waiting for me, and no matter how I was feeling, no matter what had just happened, I couldn’t avoid that.

So I kept walking, gripping the tray a little tighter, trying to pull myself together as I went as I tried not to drop the tray due to my shaking hands. I paused just inside the doorway, feeling the weight of the room pressing down on me more than I expected.

The visiting room looked like a scene from a glossy magazine, polished marble floors, tall windows dressed in soft curtains, and furniture that seemed too fancy to actually use. Yet all that grandeur faded when my gaze landed on Ethan’s back.

He was perched on the edge of an armchair, slightly hunched over, resting his elbows on his knees, his leg bouncing so fast it was almost a blur. His hair was a disheveled mess, blond strands sticking up in places they normally wouldn’t, and even from this angle, I could see how tense he was, like his body had forgotten how to unwind.

He looked... exhausted. Not the kind of tired that came from late-night studying or gaming, but a deeper kind that sunk into your bones after a night filled with worry.

A tightness gripped my chest, because it me...he was like this.

Guilt washed over me, thick and suffocating, so intense that I almost turned around and walked right back out. Just moments ago, Adrien had been touching my face, his lips on mine, and the memory lingered like a ghost on my skin.

And here I was, about to face the boy who had spent the night worrying about me, the boy who loved me. The boy I was already lying to by deciding to not telling the whole truth to him.

No one can know about Adrien’s confession.

Not Ethan, not Gigi, not Skylar... definitely not mom or Keith.

I tightened my grip on the tray, the porcelain rattling softly against the saucer as I fought to steady my breath. Over and over, I told myself that there was no way I could tell him about the kiss, now, or ever...because it wasn’t just a kiss. It was a boundary crossed, a truth that could blow everything apart if it got out. I barely understood it myself.

So I did what I usually did: I swallowed it down.

I forced a smile that felt alien on my face and took a few careful steps forward, my bare feet barely making a sound on the floor. When I spoke, my voice came out softer than I intended, fragile around the edges.

"Hi... blondie."

At first, he didn’t move, and for a second, I thought maybe he was so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even heard me. But then his leg stilled abruptly, and his shoulders tensed as if my voice had pulled him from a dark spiral.

Slowly, he turned to face me. "Noah."