My Alleged Husband-Chapter 969 - 862: No One Is Indispensable
"Actually, you two are really naive, because you think you can easily get others’ forgiveness for every mistake you’ve made. But tell me, who in the world would forgive you time and time again? You never take responsibility for your actions; you’re always hoping for others’ forgiveness, always longing for people’s approval. What meaning and qualification do you believe you have?
In reality, on this earth, no one is indispensable to another. Everyone can live just the same without someone, and perhaps live even better, more perfect than before. Everyone has different thoughts. You may think that without you, one cannot survive. But as for me, without you, I may not live worse than now. On the contrary, I might carve a different path in life through my own efforts, drawing closer to myself and striving once again to reach the pinnacle of my own life. You never offered me any companionship, which I can understand because you never knew what companionship meant. However, when you keep hurting me, treating me like a stranger, deep inside my heart, I am conflicted and in pain.
There are some things that I can’t truly forget, and it’s not that I choose to remain silent. It’s because from my standpoint, there is no reason to say anything. After all, you are my parents, regardless of the decisions you’ve made. I must always choose to forgive you. No child in the world has any way to hate their parents, because their parents gave them life, which brought about everything thereafter, even if you never taught me anything.
When I walk along the road time and time again, when I tread on my life’s path repeatedly, I realize that perhaps none of my paths were correct. But the only right choice was to forgive my parents over and over again."
Zhang Zhentian knew that this matter deeply hurt and aggrieved his son, and he felt powerless. Since he had chosen to do certain things, he must persist to the end. Having chosen to turn this path into the ultimate decision of his life, no matter what, he could not allow anything to alter his decision. No one could change any decision he made.
Perhaps the things he did in this life were indeed excessively extreme, leaving everyone unable to understand why he acted that way. Ultimately, he just wanted an ordinary life.
No matter how many mistakes he made in this life, the greatest error was using words to hurt the people who loved him the most and repeatedly turning all the beautiful things into the biggest mistakes and decisions of his life.
When those agonizing worries submerged him again and again.
When all those memories flooded his mind ceaselessly, that feeling left him feeling selfish, unable to adapt. Those thoughts lingered in his mind, and in the depths of his heart, he could only walk on his own life path time and again. Only by doing so, he hoped to live happily, and not let the things he wanted become so difficult. But what did he actually get in return? Time and again, he only caused his family harm, and in other words, he was nothing.
"Child, perhaps in your eyes, you see me as an utterly evil man, a bad father, but that’s not how I see myself.
Do you know? This feeling, especially each time I abandoned you once more, was the clearest. Because I knew I had made yet another huge mistake, but there was no turning back, I had to see it through to the end. I wanted everyone to know that even if it was a wrong decision, I would stick to it!
Even if in the end I had no retreat, even if every action I took was wrong, I still had to see it through to the end, not for anything else, but to make everyone who looked down on me look more clearly, so they would see that everything I did was right. Even if in the end, I lost everything, left with nothing, I still hoped that everyone could be happy, could find joy, even if that happiness did not come from me.
There are times when I even hate my actions. How could I bear to hurt my family, pushing you to this situation again and again? How heavy your feelings must have been! I am your relative, yet I chose to bully and abandon you over and over again. Deep inside, how could you not feel pain, not feel hurt? Yet, faced with such an ending, you could only endure it. After all, having a family member like me might be a kind of disgrace to your inner self!"
"You know I never saw you as my disgrace, because having you as my parents still made me happy. I’ve said it countless times: no matter what, you are my parents, and that fact cannot be changed. Even if you never come back to this home for your entire life, this is an undeniable truth. No one can change that.
I only hope that whenever you make decisions, you can consider the elderly father a bit more. Even if you disregard me, I can understand because you have no feelings for me, given our lack of interaction. But what about Grandpa? He raised you, gave you life, and let you grow up, providing you with a lavish life for decades. Even if in the end, you don’t want to stay by his side, shouldn’t you at least accompany him so he can happily enjoy his remaining years?
I do understand that people are selfish and live for themselves. No one lives altruistically. But can’t you at least consider the feelings of your own family members within your selfishness? No matter how selfish you are, he never blamed you. In his heart, he always regarded you as his proudest son. But what about you? Where have you placed him with all your actions? Have you treated him as your father? Every word you’ve said, every deed you’ve done, which one hasn’t broken Grandpa’s heart? Do you understand his pain? You haven’t. Deep inside, it’s always been about your own desires, and for your desires, you can do anything, sparing nothing, even if it means sacrificing everything..."
