My Alleged Husband-Chapter 1460 - 1254: The Pain Once Given
Zhang Yichen now recalls every single thing he has done in the past, and he cannot believe that those were the words he uttered as a son to his mom and dad. His parents poured their hearts out to him, and he chose the cruelest way to hurt them, each sentence piercing deeply into their most painful points.
Yet they never once argued back, nor did they ever criticize him.
"Just because I abandoned you all these years, you have always harbored resentment towards me. Indeed, even if you don’t say it, I know it in my heart. There’s no need to pretend to be so magnanimous; I remember clearly the things you’ve done and said. Don’t forget that you are still my son, and no matter what, you can’t escape this fact. No matter how much you want to deny that I am your biological father, this will never change because, by the world’s recognition, by the law, I am your father. This is an unchangeable outcome for a lifetime."
"I have to admit that sometimes, although I find you as a father unbearable and it makes me uncomfortable inside, I have never thought of disowning you as my father. I clearly remember every word I have said. I only need to prove to my mom and dad that abandoning me was a mistake, and that’s sufficient. I have never thought of driving my parents out of the house or preventing them from returning home for a lifetime. Nor have I thought of destroying my mom and dad’s relationship because everyone hopes to have a happy family, and the premise of having a happy family is a harmonious relationship between parents, never having a day of divorce. But when you said the word ’divorce’ to mom, I knew that the harmony I always hoped for was gone like that because I already have a broken family. The moment my mom and dad abandoned me, it was destined that I would have this ending. Even though I have such an ending, I still don’t blame others because this kind of thing can only rely on fate. If it’s destined for you to be together, you will surely be together for a lifetime. If it’s destined that your emotional road will be bumpy, then you will not sail smoothly. Often, as long as there’s solace in your heart, as long as you are open and honest inside, there’s nothing that can’t be accomplished. Many times, I really don’t understand why you want to hurt mom over and over again. But now I think maybe I understand. Perhaps in your eyes, you see it as a kind of love for mom, but from mom’s perspective, she sees it as continuous harm. Yet you don’t take it to heart. Everyone sees issues differently from their angles, so the results they see are different too. No matter what kind of word you say to me or what you do to me today, I still won’t blame you because you are my father, just like you said. You are my father; this fact cannot be changed legally or genetically! No matter what you do or say as a father, you are still my father in my heart. Sometimes, I indeed speak disrespectfully, but you can’t blame me. You need to consider that a senior who doesn’t even respect himself, who always thinks about bullying his son, and lets others take the blame for him—do you think such a senior truly deserves respect from others? You are my biological father. I hope you can consider my feelings when you do things, consider the feelings of granddad. You are a member of a prestigious family; how can you do something that makes granddad lose face? You hurt granddad so much, but in the end, granddad still thought it through after my persuasion and decided to persuade you to come back home. But what about you? What is your result for granddad? You don’t want to come back home, you don’t want granddad to dominate your life. Now that he has thought it through, how could he dominate your fate again because you return home? At times you are too suspicious and judge a gentleman with the heart of a petty person. You are not stupid; it’s just that you never think things through when you do them. You always say whatever comes to mind, do whatever you want, and you never think if what you’re doing is right or not. If you think what I said today is right, then please treat mom well and return to granddad’s side; accompany granddad, and don’t let him be exhausted because of your issues anymore. He can’t take such a strain anymore!"
"Are you now asking me to come back as if you’re bestowing charity upon me? Do you really think I would spend the rest of my life relying on your charity? You look down on me too much. No matter what, I am still a Mercenary by trade; I have skills, I have the things that can make me a hitman for others. Do you think that by singing in harmony with my dad and saying these good words to me, I would return to you? You underestimate me too much. Now, as far as I’m concerned, all your good intentions towards me are charity. You just don’t want me to live the life I want outside, so you always think of ways to test me, to humiliate me, right? In your mind, does humiliating me make you really happy? I am part of your family; humiliating me is like humiliating yourselves!"
Zhang Yichen did not understand what you were thinking at that time. Clearly, granddad’s intentions were good to have him come back home, and clearly, I really hoped he could live peacefully with mom for a lifetime, but why, in his eyes, does he always see it as our family’s charity towards him? Has his heart really become so twisted? If it were charity, could he not tell? Obviously, between them, there were not such heavy obstacles, but in the end, it became this result. Who truly is responsible for all this sin?
"You’re overthinking this. Granddad asking you to come back home is not charity. He hopes his biological son can come back to his side because that’s from a father’s longing for his son; he hopes his son can return to his arms just like you long for mom and hope mom can return to your arms. You miss mom so much, so you should be able to understand granddad’s intentions. Why do you still talk about granddad like that? I just can’t bear it. If you think our inviting you back home is charity, then come back honorably and don’t return with that disgraceful demeanor!"
Charity? Zhang Yichen really couldn’t understand why the love his granddad had for his father was seen by his father as charity. What kind of psychological state was his father in to view granddad’s longing for him in this way? It’s befuddling; what could be the reason?
He recalls every word his mom ever said to him, really can’t believe how magnanimous his mother was, yet what sort of hate blinded him at that moment, leading him to make such impulsive decisions.
