Kaijin Fighter: So I Have to Make Monsters, So What?-Chapter 1185: One Last Trick
^But with all that in mind, we should probably get ready to leave soon,^ Zhen Liu eventually said in response to Lythero’s stunned expression.
^Okay...why?,^ Lythero asked, afraid of the answer.
^Because the seals placed on Leon, Kendana and Rama should probably be wearing off in the next hour or so, and we don’t want to be here when they get back. Just because we managed to beat the shit out of them before, doesn’t mean I want to go through another battle this early in the morning,^ Zhen Liu explained.
’That and because I’m technically running on a limited engine as well,’ he thought to himself.
^Ah...let me at least get something in my stomach.^
^Of course, although, you only got about thirty or so minutes.^
^Well...that’s nostalgic,^ Lythero commented.
^Pardon?^
^Back when I was travelling with my masters,^ Lythero explained. ^We’d often have to get the hell out of dodge because we’d pissed off the local townsfolk after saving them from whatever problem plagued them. Not collectively, more like the actions of one reflected poorly on the rest of us. Ya know?^
^That...huh. Magnificent seven but comedic I see.^
^Pardon?^
^Nothing. Let’s just finish eating.^
^Okay.^
...Meanwhile, somewhere in the jungle..
^Stupid...leafy...motherfucker...,^ Kendana cursed between several deep gulps of air, while staring down one of Dealmaker’s weird leaf monsters.
For the past ten hours or so, he and this zako or whatever it was called was playing a cat and mouse game of the latter keeping the former’s clothes/dignity away.
Normally, such a thing would be less than trivial to an Aether Grandmaster, but the man’s cultivation was still sealed due to Dealmaker’s abilities. It was under these conditions though that Kendana came to a terrible realization.
’I am...severely out of shape.’
Actively pursuing aether cultivation enabled one to surpass their physical limits and maintain a level of health that a strict diet and exercise could only achieve after years and years of effort.
It’s actually an open secret that some aether warriors end up incredibly indulgent and gluttonous after reaching a certain cultivation point, due to their aether formulas acting as a means to circumvent regular health problems such as old age and unhealthy diets.
However, this also meant that in those rare and impossible events where one becomes unable to use their aether cultivation, they would revert back to being a regular mortal and all the problems that came with being mortal.
Kendana may have been relatively fit for his age, but he was pushing about one hundred and three years old, as of last week.
Combined with the fact that he had been neglecting basic exercises in favor of focusing on business and his aether cultivation on a more spiritual, added up to Kendana having absolutely terrible cardio.
Granted, it probably didn’t help that the aforementioned zako that had stolen his clothes has been purposely messing with him by occasionally slowing down, outright hiding and just straight up climbing trees like they were a monkey.
And he wasn’t the only one suffering from this.
At this point in time, Leon and Rama were also suffering from the fact that they were physically unfit for mortals. The former almost passed out due to their large weight impeding his breathing, while the latter almost fainted multiple times due to his skinny body not having any fat to burn.
It should be noted that Kendana had no idea for these physical developments, due to the aforementioned zakos involved having been sent to run in directions opposite of each other.
(Un)fortunately, this state of affairs wasn’t going to last for long though.
’Just need...another...hour...’
True to his word, the seal placed upon Kendana’s cultivation was in-fact temporary. Little by little, minute by minute and hour by hour, Kendana could feel the seal placed on his cultivation becoming lighter and lighter.
In fact, about three hours ago, he was under the assumption that he could’ve overpower the seal through sheer force of will and aether and attempted to do so, only to realize that that was an incredibly bad idea.
He had no idea what kind of seal Dealmaker had placed upon him, but the moment he tried to push against it, the whole seal flared up and retaliated in a…rather humiliating manner that could not be appropriately described without making use of a euphemism involving walnuts meeting a nutcracker.
A nutcracker made of solid steel and with jagged teeth, no less.
Regardless, once Kendana found his breath, he made sure to take a deep one before pursuing after the zako again, who proceeded to sprint away the moment Kendana gave chase.
’Once I get my clothes and cultivation back, overwhelming odds be damned, I will get payback!,’ Kendana swore to himself and the heavens. But alas, this wish would not come to pass, because Dealmaker was smart enough to not stick around after doing what he did.
Mostly.
...About an hour and a half later…
^Hey, Rama...did the zakos who stole your clothes ditch them as soon as your seal was undone?,^ Leon asked while shaking a biting beetle out of his pants leg.
^Yes, and they proceeded to fuck off into the jungle like a fucking phantom and I couldn’t even beat any catharsis into them,^ Rama complained while trying to get water out of his ears. ^I haven’t been this humiliated since I was an Acolyte.^
^Same.^
The two Grandmasters of the Cortez Company had regained their abilities at about the same time, and were even equidistant from Papaya Town. Unfortunately, they had been left in rather compromising positions in the course of reclaiming their clothes. Leon ended up falling into a nest of Biting Beetles, which were like termites but worst, while Rama ended up diving headfirst into a river full of jungle eels.
Regardless, after they had reclaimed their respective outfits, they both returned to the mansion at the exact same time.
Now, all they had to do was wait for Kendana...which wasn’t that long of a wait.
Literally five minutes after they had thought about just heading inside before they completely reunited, Kendana had finally caught up with them. Although, he had a rather sour look on his face...and a strange smell coming off of him.
It only took a whiff for the two subordinate Grandmasters to understand what had occurred to Kendana.
This chapter is updat𝓮d by freēnovelkiss.com.
^Boss...,^ Leon began to carefully ask. ^Did you get tricked into falling into a Monkey-^
^Yes.^
^Oh...^
^But did you at least manage to secure your clothes before-^
^Clothes are spotless. I am not, Rama,^ Kendana answered flatly.
^Ah...^
For those unable to pick up context clues, Kendana was tricked into falling into what is commonly known as a "Monkey Waste Pit". Needless to say, he wasn’t happy in the slightest.
^Now then, I don’t know about you two,^ Kendana began to say as he walked to the front door of the estate. ^But I’m going to go take a long bath and...wait a minute, what is this?^
Before they entered the estate, Kendana noticed that pinned to the door, with what appeared to a large animal tooth, was a letter.
^What the fuck...^
^We should probably read it, right?^
^Yes...^
Tearing it from its spot on the door, the trio of Grandmasters gathered to read the letter, pungent smells be damned. However, as they continued to read the letter, their expressions became more and more grim.
As to why, well...some things are better shown than told.
...
Dear Cortez Grandmasters,
By the time of your reading of this letter, my compatriots and I would have already left your town behind for more interesting locales, read: continue on Lythero’s amazing adventure for revenge and blood.
Aside from that, this letter was also written to inform you all that we took the opportunity you gave us to make ourselves at home and as you can see, we didn’t burn it down.
However, we did do the following in no particular order:
- We ate most of your food in ways that would lead to excessive leftovers.
- We may or may not have clogged your toilets in the pursuit of relieving our stomachs from eating most of your food.
- We graffitied most of the walls in your home, and have rotated every single painting so that they be hung upside-down.
-We may or may not have hired several ladies of the night to make proper use of all your beds, and somebody may have made a mess in one of them. Either way, nobody knows who did what where.
I hope this letter finds you clothed and rested.
P.S.
We also took a chunk of your treasures
Good luck on cleaning up our messes.
...
Needless to say, Kendana let out a blood curling scream of rage after reading this letter.
...Unsurprisingly, at a cliff overlooking this incident...
^Huh...that was actually incredibly satisfying to watch,^ Lythero admitted.
^See? And now they have to live with that shame forever and always. Told you it was worth watching from here,^ Zhen Liu said with a smile. ^Best part, they can never confirm any of this without having to ask some very awkward questions that will haunt them for years.^
^Who knew humiliation based revenge was fun?^
