It's Actually Not Easy Wanting to be a Supporting Male Lead-Chapter 7 part6
Translated by Eve
Edited by Cat
The author (Not Eve LOL just in case anyone panics) has something to say:
Dear friends, I'm finally back! I don't know if there's anyone waiting here for updates cough cough…… After graduation, it's really hard to find a job. Looking for work, getting used to work, social life, everything is worse. In short, nothing's going smoothly in real life so I didn't want to write. Therefore, I felt dispirited. Now, things are better, so I rolled back here in disgrace.
The job I just started has made me so busy my head is spinning, so I can only update whenever I can during this time. I don't know what day updates will come, and I won't be able to respond to all your comments as I had before. However, I will not abandon this pit! Messages will also all be read. I'm sorry! I hope that everyone won't scorn me! QAQ
Under Max's meticulous scheming, the feelings between Dima and Ya became more and more harmonious.
Dima had never seen such a cheerful and optimistic merman, who had both a thirst for knowledge and who could form his own opinions. If one were to talk about his indulgence and pampering of Sui Yuan, then it would be comparable to that of how one would treat their precious, invaluable pet. Towards Ya, however, Dima regarded him as an existence comparable to himself — he didn't let Max take care of him. Rather, he was their equal. He was a kindred soul who he could talk endlessly with. But at the same time, within these friendly feelings were the beginnings of something ambiguous. Even Dima himself did not dare to think too much of them.
Compared to the tangled mess that were the feelings within Dima's heart, Ya's favourable sentiment regarding Dima was much more pure. After all, they weren't batting for the same team, so how could they possibly happily fall in love like that?!
Originally, love budded between Max and Ya because the former had seized the other by force. Now that Max had been replaced by the much gentler Dima who had no way to express his love, the probability of Ya realizing Dima's feelings fell so low that it caused people to become boiling mad. He completely regarded Dima as nothing more than a good brother.
It was probably because Dima was too much of a kind and tender gentleman, which made Ya feel completely at ease with him. Therefore, even though Ya would often be reminded of his merman identity and thus vigilantly try to protect his chastity before Max, with Dima, however, he would always forget about this fact. Ya would treat Dima as if they were regular same-sex buddies in his old world, and would touch him with the same kind of nonchalance. Dima however, would always be rendered flushed and bewildered. Again and again, he'd have to suppress the restless, dangerous feelings within his heart.
As for Sui Yuan, his feelings were an even bigger mess than that of those two. On one hand, he really did not want to fulfill his duty as a merman to become increasingly intimate with his "mate". On the other hand, as he helplessly watched the situation slip into a deep love story between the protagonist shou and the supporting male lead, just as Max had planned, the sense of responsibility that burst through his heart really made him unable to sit or stand still.
You can't have your cake and eat it too — This is indeed a wise saying…..
Therefore, under the pressure of his tangled feelings and 5237's helplessness, Sui Yuan began to get a bad feeling. After all, according to his character settings, he was a feeble and pure merman who was completely unable to form his own ideas. He was completely incapable of getting jealous over a potential rival, nor was he able to contend for his "mate's" attention. He was nothing more than a set piece whenever Dima and Ya had a particularly good conversation. From time to time, he would look at the two people with eyes full of worship, not making a sound— in any case, according to his settings, Sui Yuan shouldn't be able to understand what they were talking about.
With Dima's help, Ya quickly assimilated to this completely new world and began to carefully plan for his future.
Ya's original hobby and major was in fashion design. He had a wealth of theoretical knowledge and was full of enthusiasm that had not yet been worn down by the ways of his original world. He also still had a vivid imagination. It was just unfortunate that not long after he had entered the working force, before he had time to show off what he could do, he was inexplicably forced to become a merman. Unwilling to be treated as someone's exclusive property for the rest of his life, Ya naturally wanted to fight for his dream, freedom, and his dignity. Even if it was difficult, Ya would never back down.
Upon hearing Ya frankly state his dream and plan of becoming financially independent through fashion design, Dima was astounded and couldn't help but laugh a bit. He had gotten used to seeing mermen who had no way of thinking for themselves and were completely dependent on their mates. Although Dima did not believe that Ya's "fantasy" could come true, however this did not stop him from encouraging this unconventional but likeable merman. He would help him as best as he could.
In the original text, when Ya wanted to start his own business, he had the tacit and covert support of his mate, Max. The Max who was supposed to be acting like Dima in order to cultivate good feelings between them, however, only scoffed at the other's wish. However, he also indulged him, since he would only cause him to lose his smile and energy if he were to deprive him of his freedom and dream.
It was a pity that the current Max had thrown away the script, completely not acting the way he should be acting. When Ya sounded him out and casually asked about his desire to open up a business, Max simply rejected him coldly and then ignored him. He was completely against it. Therefore, when it came time for Ya to reveal his talents, the one supporting him from behind was Dima, instead of Max.
Since both Max and Dima held high military positions and were also considered influential people of the upper class in this world, as well as because of the fact that Ya had the special identity of merman, the clientele that Ya always envisioned were the mermen mates of men with statuses like Max and Dima. These upper class men also had their own mermen mates who they doted on very much. As long as their merman desired something, they would spare no effort to fulfill their mate's wish, especially if it was a matter as small as spending a bit of money to buy slightly pricey clothing.
As such, after having determined a niche clientele and gained a backer, Ya began his career as a fashion designer in another world.
As a protagonist, he would definitely have a golden finger. Although Sui Yuan did not understand fashion design in the least, however, he did know that no matter how Ya designed, the people of this world would end up scrabbling madly for it. The thing that depressed Sui Yuan the most was that he was turned into Ya's own exclusive model. Reportedly, it was because he looked pretty much like what Ya had envisioned. He was Ya's muse.
Whenever Ya came out with a new design, Ya would always leave a set for Sui Yuan. After making Sui Yuan model, he would take photos in line with the aesthetics of the clothes to use as advertisement, placing them in his clothing boutiques to attract customers. Sui Yuan's talent for acting was thoroughly dug out by Ya.
Whether he needed to appear pure, clueless, warm and gentle, seductive, or even cold and aloof — Sui Yuan naturally and vividly acted out all kinds of temperaments one after another. He carried a unique charm that caused people's hearts to race. Sui Yuan who was directed by Ya, wanted to cry without tears. Although he did not want to cooperate, his body, however, would always reflect his inner nature and obediently make all kinds of poses. His obedient attitude caused 5237 to not know what it should make of it.
While Ya's project was growing like wildfire, Dima also fully healed and was able to leave the hospital. Only, as Max's deputy, he continued to serve Ya's need at any time and any place at Max's request. Although this could be considered feathering one's nest, however, because of Dima's unclear feelings towards Ya, not only was he not discontent, but he was secretly delighted. Thus, because he held a guilty conscience, he did his utmost to try to secretly compensate Max, who was "in the dark", which made Sui Yuan was was watching everything silently especially want to light him a candle.
To even help the one who had sold him count the money from this transaction, this saying was basically describing the pathetic Dima!
Ya was the designer, Dima was the investor, and Sui Yuan was a walking advertisement. Ya's brand began to spread amongst the mermen and the public praise and earnings increased with every passing day. Furthermore, Ya's talent and Sui Yuan's "beauty" also became a hot topic for everyone.
On the other hand, Max who was originally supposed to be the biggest supporter, had completely withdrawn. It was also unknown as to what he was doing in the shadows. Sui Yuan, who could never believe that this pig teammate would act well-behaved and content with how things were, always felt a bit ill-at-ease, as if this was the calm before the storm, like the peace that happened before disaster struck for a protagonist.
As Dima had been discharged from the hospital, Sui Yuan should leave Max's residence. However, as Ya's muse, he was frequently left alone at home with Ya, with Max's tacit approval or even encouragement. Thus, he and Dima gradually drifted apart. Furthermore, because of his hazy feelings towards Ya, Dima's attitude towards Sui Yuan became strange. Sometimes, he acted distant. Other times, because of his guilty consciousness, he doted on him more. This made Sui Yuan want to pat Dima on the shoulder consolingly and tell him that he should calm down several times. Sui Yuan was afraid that if Dima continued on like this, he would eventually develop schizophrenia.
Even if Max didn't do anything on the surface, he still caused so much suffering……
During the banquet, Sui Yuan accompanied Dima, gaze on the wine glass in Dima's hands. Dima was obviously absent-minded. Sui Yuan could not help but sigh in his heart and feel particularly sympathetic towards him.
Following Dima's gaze, Sui Yuan looked in Ya's direction. Max was holding Ya, and they were surrounded by a fawning crowd. Pursing his lips, Sui Yuan blinked a few times before quickly averting his gaze.
Sui Yuan couldn't help but admit that he felt a bit uncomfortable when he saw Max stand with someone else, looking like a match-made-in-heaven, as others teased them and gave them their blessings. Although he wasn't as despondent as Dima, who was frustrated and disappointed, but he also felt that this wasn't something good.
Although 5237 did its best to remind him, and although he worked hard to restrain himself, however, some feelings could not be controlled. This feeling caught people without warning. By the time one realized it, they would already be unable to get rid of it.
Perhaps it was because he had already gotten accustomed to the other's existence, or perhaps it was because their life and death was so intertwined, or maybe he had been infected by the other person's deep feelings— we don't know from where love comes, but once love begins, it will never end.
Sui Yuan knew that 5237 held "great expectations" for him, and was always worried that he would deviate from his raison d'etre because of his feelings, which would lead to an unacceptable outcome. Thus, he was absolutely afraid of revealing his thoughts, as if once he spoke them aloud and admitted to his own wavering thoughts, he'd be given no second chance.
Actually, Sui Yuan was not particularly attached to the word "survive". He was also not afraid of being "destroyed", as 5237 was. His meaning of his existence was to seamlessly play one role after another. This meaning, however, was not at all enough to make him desperate to continue "living". Sui Yuan's attachment to the plot was only due to his sense of responsibility. It wasn't because he wanted to cling onto his existence.
This so-called "destruction", it was just like his "creation". He would simply return to nothingness. To be without feelings, without thought, without an ego, what was there to be afraid of? With regards to the current Sui Yuan, he was only a bit reluctant to part with his experiences in the bustling worlds and the vicissitudes of life. He was reluctant to part with 5237 who had always accompanied him, encouraged him, helped him, and held him back. He would probably even be reluctant to part from Zhao Xihe, who had been the one to bring about this situation that had forced him into a dilemma with no way out.
If he were to disappear, what would happen to Zhao Xihe? — this was the first question that came to Sui Yuan's mind.
5237 would probably shed a few tears for him, and would be sad and heartbroken. But after being assigned to another actor, it would continue to fulfill its responsibility to guide the new actor.
Then, what about Zhao Xihe? Would he be able to be like 5237? Would he be aggrieved for a while before seeking a new target to cling onto? Would he eventually treat his replacement the same way he treated him now?
He didn't know why, but once he thought of this, Sui Yuan felt wrong from head to toe. Suddenly, a feeling of unwillingness towards being "destroyed" sprung forth.
Because it was that fellow who had pushed him into this predicament that had also been the one to ignite a will to live within him. Towards this sort of contradictory feelings, Sui Yuan had not idea what to say. He simply wanted to kneel!
"Lan? What are you thinking about?"
Dima snapped out of his reverie. He suddenly realized that he had already left his merman with a cold shoulder for a long time, making him immediately feel an indescribable degree of self-reproach. Upon seeing the slightly dark expression in his merman's eyes, Dima raised his hand to stroke Sui Yuan's long, blue hair, to try and make up for his mistake.
Sui Yuan was roused out of his trance by Dima's voice. He blinked, and reflexively showed him a smile that was pure and considerate. This appearance that was completely without any resentment made Dima's heart ache, quickly making him drown in guilt.
This made Dima feel conflicted and made it difficult for him to find words to say. Sui Yuan also had lingering fears. To be this absent-minded even when in close proximity to an original inhabitant of this world who he was "close" with, it was simply leading to OOCing! Fortunately, he reflexively kept a soft and smiling expression. Otherwise, how would he explain this to Dima!
"Thinking about you," Sui Yuan quickly adjusted his state of mind. He smiled and looked at Dima, eyes full of tenderness and dependency. Within, there was also a bit of cautious worry mixed in, "What kind of difficulties did you come across? It seems to be a bit….."
He cleverly turned the question back to Dima. As he knew about the other's guilty heart, he avoided suffering any damage by reflecting it back onto Dima. Recently, whenever Dima revealed an intention to get close to him, he would only need to intentionally or unintentionally mention Ya, and Dima would immediately feel guilty and lose all interest.
He had to say, this time, he and Max were cooperating well together!
Indeed, upon hearing Sui Yuan's question, Dima immediately revealed an awkward and helpless smile. He silently shook his head, and unconsciously moved his gaze towards the brilliantly smiling Ya who was carried in Max's arms.
As if he had just made an extremely difficult decision, Dima sighed deeply, eyes dark but full of perseverance. Suddenly, he extended his arms to pull Sui Yuan into his arms.
Sui Yuan subconsciously stiffened. Immediately, he forced his body to relax, and he nestled into the crook of Dima's arms. Dima lowered his head to lightly kiss Sui Yuan's cheek, and said quietly, "I'm sorry. I won't do it again."
Sui Yuan was frightened by Dima's abnormal actions just now. He subconsciously understood the other's meaning, but his outward appearance was a bit bewildered, "Why do you need to apologize? What won't happen again?"
"I won't neglect you because I'm busy thinking about matters on my own anymore," Dima smiled, tone intimate.
Dima's actions caused Sui Yuan's hair to raise from head to toe. However, he had no choice but to look like he enjoyed it. Without waiting for him to come up with a way to push Dima away without going against his character settings, they suddenly heard a loud sound of something heavy falling to the ground.
The originally noisy banquet room quieted down. Sui Yuan and Dima both turned their heads to look towards the source of the sound. In the middle of the crowd, Max was fixing his cuff apathetically. Meanwhile, Ya was behind him, trying to remain calm but still appeared alarmed.
Before the two people, a man who had clearly been beaten to the ground cut a sorry figure as he picked himself up. His eyes were full of a ruthless haze, and he looked at Max as if he had killed his own father.
The man who had been hit stood up and did not say a word. He only snorted coldly before turning around and leaving the banquet hall. Max was not in the least concerned. He raised his hands, indicating to everyone that they did not have to pay this any attention. Only then did the banquet hall reluctantly resume its previous noisy mood. However, anyone could feel the uneasy atmosphere surging underneath the false noise.
When he saw that the situation had passed, Max raised his lips with a bit of satisfaction. His gaze that was directed at Sui Yuan was full of warning. Obviously, the interaction between Sui Yuan and Dima were completely seen by him just now. Max, at the end of his patience, suddenly "borrowed help" from an outside party, thereby interrupting the evidently "warm" atmosphere between Sui Yuan and Dima.
Sui Yuan received that sight full of extreme admonishment and subconsciously trembled. He turned his head to look at Dima, and asked as if scared out of his wits, "Just now……What was that?"
Dima wrinkled his brow, expression sharp, no longer soft and gentle as before. When he heard Sui Yuan's question, Dima reflexively comforted him with a smile. However, he only shook his head and remained silent. He warned him to sit there obediently and not run off. Dima himself walked towards Max and Ya, worries and anxiety overflowing.
Sui Yuan watched as Max straightforwardly handed over the frightened Ya over to Dima to be taken care of. Max then left the banquet hall. Meanwhile, Dima comforted Ya in a soft voice. Sui Yuan couldn't help but sigh.
As soon as Max saw that Dima wanted to draw an invisible line between himself and Ya, he swiftly and decisively decided to put an end it before it even started. This kind of decisiveness was because he did not want to to give Dima a chance to return to Sui Yuan!
Sui Yuan sat silently in the corner. His pair of eyes looked at Dima and Ya who stood shoulder to shoulder, and diligently played the role of a merman who was abandoned by his mate–a mate who then went to comfort someone else. In his heart, he lit yet another candle for Dima.
—-To be tricked into having an extramarital affair, really unbearable…
Mijia has used the move “Surprise! Have some angst and feels”.
It was very effective.
Eve has fainted.
You have no Fluff revives because both your projects are angsty train wrecks right now!
