Help! Five Beast Alphas Want To Breed Me!!(BL)-Chapter 196: Dancing Shoes
Rhydian;
The silence in the corridor as I made my way to his room, felt heavier than any silence should feel.
Every step toward his chamber echoed like guilt bouncing off the walls. Koda told me where to find him, and even though we’re both alone in this castle, it feels like an entire audience is about to watch me get absolutely humiliated.
But whatever Eliàn does to me, I deserve it.
I should turn around. I should give him space.
But I can’t.
Not after seeing the fire in his eyes earlier... that anger, that’s disgust... and that pain.
Pain that I put there.
When I reach his door, I hesitate before knocking. I’m met with silence. Though I can smell him inside.
I swallow and knock again, but there’s still silence.
"Come in..." His voice calls skeptically, and my heart leaps into my throat.
My fingers hover just above the polished wood, and I can feel my heart hammering in my throat as I take a long, shaky breath.
I gently push the door open, and I’m welcomed by the scent I have missed so much
The curtains sway lazily in the afternoon breeze, and my throat goes dry when I see Elián standing by the bed, with his wide eyes glued to me.
His scent shifts from its usually sweet undertone to sharp mintyness the moment he sees me. He’s so upset his scent shifted? This is going to be hard.
******
"I know what Bram is!" I yell to get him to stop trying to leave.
The past few minutes were torture. Every word Elián said to me was a merciless dagger to my heart, and I could see that he didn’t care whether I was hurt or not by his words.
Have I completely lost him?
"Elián, I just want to talk to you..." I beg as I look into the eyes of the angry young man I’m holding on to, and he glares at me.
"Why?" His words slice clean through the air, defiant and purely agitated.
"I came to admit that I was a fool." I spit, and he pauses.
The anger, betrayal and disappointment in his eyes thaws a bit, but not all of it.
At least He’s giving me room to speak.
"You were right. I was blind, Elián. I trusted the wrong person. I thought Bram..." I begin, but anger returns burning furiously in his eyes at the mention of the name. 𝑓𝓇𝘦ℯ𝘸𝘦𝑏𝓃𝑜𝘷ℯ𝑙.𝑐𝑜𝓂
"You thought Bram what? That he was honest? Loyal? Worth risking me over?" He completes for me and the last words strike deeper, sharper than any blade I’ve ever faced.
I flinch but I don’t back away.
"I thought he was telling the truth," I admit with a voice rough and trembling in fear. It seems like whatever I say, I won’t be able to get him to forgive me...
"Elián, I see it now. I see what he is... a con artist, manipulative, conniving..." I begin, but I’m cut off when Elián suddenly laughs.
A hollow, humorless sound that twists and breaks something inside me.
"Oh, you see it now? How convenient for you." He says, and my grip on his wrist falters.
"Elián, please. Listen to me. I’m not saying this to lie to you. I’m saying it because I know what I did. I let him poison my mind against you. I didn’t listen. I didn’t believe you. And I’ll never forgive myself for that..." I whisper with tears clouding my eyes, and he looks down at my hand which is still wrapped against his wrist.
A tear falls from my eyes as I watch him slowly rip my fingers off from around his wrist.
Then he looks up at me with his jaw tight as he shakes his head slowly.
"Forgive yourself?" He repeats, and I pause.
"That’s what you’re worried about?" He adds, and my eyes widen at how he’s taken my words.
"Elián..."
"No, Rhydian..." he scolds. His voice breaks as he steps away from me.
"You don’t get to stand there and talk about forgiveness. You watched me break! You watched me beg you to believe me, and you turned your back because some pretty little words from that poisonous brat sounded more convincing than me!" He spit, and I flinch. His words tear through me, but I don’t move. I let them land. I deserve every one of them.
"I was wrong," I whisper.
"Yes, you were!" He screams with his eyes glisten, though no tears fall.
He’s too angry to cry... too proud to give me that.
"And now what? You think I’ll just... what... smile and thank you for realizing it too late?" He sneers, and I swallow
"I don’t expect anything from you," I say quietly as I feel everything inside me begin to crumble in the presence of this much hate from him.
"I just needed you to know that I see him for what he is now. He’s here today because I need him out of the way for Ishu to gather enough evidence against him. I’m building a case to convict him. He won’t hurt you again, I promise." I speak desperately for his understanding. For his mercy. For just a bit of all that anger to melt away, but still, I get nothing.
Elián stares at me in disbelief for a long, stretched moment, then he laughs again. Soft, sharp, and cruel.
"So that’s it?" he says slowly, voice trembling. "Now that you see the truth, I’m supposed to what? Pat you on the back and say well done?" He mocks, and I gulp.
"No..."
"I’m supposed to pacify you? Comfort you for finally growing a brain!?" He adds as he steps closer now. Close enough for me to feel the heat radiating from his body, but his tone is ice.
"Where was this humility when I tried to reach you, Rhydian? When I tried to tell you Bram was using you? You looked me dead in the eyes and treated me like dirt. Like I was jealous!" He says, and I shut my eyes and look awa from him.
"I mean, maybe I was but that was because I cared about you! I was starting to fall in love with you and what was my reward!?" He adds, and my eyes snap open as I look back up at him.
Cared?
"Cared?" I voice out, and Elián pauses. I watch his lips twist in fury and heartbreak, and then he takes a step back, his breathing ragged.
"You know what’s happening right now?" he asks softly, with his voice trembling as he holds my gaze.
"The music is playing, Rhydian. Get your dancing shoes... and dance to your mistakes." He spits, and the silence that follows hits harder than his words.
"I have given you way too many chances, and you’ve been creative enough to hurt me in new ways each time. Do not make the mistake of thinking I’ll be generous to give you another chance." He spits and I almost stagger.
He steps closer to me and pokes his finger against my chest with his eyes locked on mine as he says the next words.
"Koda, Zephan, Zethar and Lioran. I will consider giving them all chances and even letting them run a train on me, before EVER looking in your direction again." He spits and I don’t even realize I’ve stopped breathing until he storms past me
The wind from his movement brushes my arm as he drags the door open, and before I can move or speak... he’s gone.
The echo of his footsteps fades down the corridor, leaving the scent of his moon flowers behind like a ghost.
I stare at the empty doorway, chest tight. My fists clench at my sides as his words replay in my head.
"I will consider giving them all chances, before EVER looking in your direction again."
I lost him.
I... I fucking lost him...
I drag a hand down my face and look out the window as tears well in my eyes.
The drums from the ceremony have gone quiet, leaving only the distant chirp of charismatic birds in the distance. That, and the sound of my guilt gnawing through my thoughts.
I’ve faced warlords, fought beasts twice my size, endured torture without breaking.
But the thought of never gaining his forgiveness... terrifies me.
Elián’s heart is a fortress now, one I helped build brick by brick with every cruel word and every doubt I threw at him.
And if I want a chance to tear that wall down... I’ll have to bleed for it.
I’ll have to work harder than I’ve ever worked for anything in my life.
I’ve constantly proving to him that im a hopeless investment... I need to change that.
I need to work hard till Elián looks at me and doesn’t see the fool who hurt him... but the fool who actually loves him.
The fool who has finally learnt all the ways... to love him right...
He is righ though. The music of my mistakes is indeed playing. It’s high time I start dancing to it.
The mistake of daring to pick Bram... over Elián...
