Flip the Coin [BL]-Chapter 262. Insecure

That was the first night I didn’t sleep well since coming here.

I opened my eyes, not feeling myself being held, and I also didn’t hear the shower, indicating that Henry was near.

It was silent—so silent that it was as if I was utterly alone.

I turned my head a bit too hastily to look for Henry when I saw him sitting on his bed, staring at me sideways while holding his legs, with his head on his knees.

It looked strange with a body as big as his, but more importantly, having someone staring at you without making a sound nearly scared the life out of me.

"Fuck, you scared me." At least now I am awake.

I stood up and groggily walked to the closet; if I had seen it right, today we would again have some running on the track field, and I am not going to shower twice if I have to do so later anyway.

The closet was on the same wall as Henry’s bed, while on my side was the door to the bathroom.

I opened the closet and froze.

No one stuck to me, no ’good morning’, nothing.

I leaned back to look at Henry, meeting his eyes.

"Good morning?"

"Kenny?" He asked, looking expressionless.

"Yeah?"

"Kenny?" He repeated.

"What’s wrong with you?" I stepped back and came to his side.

He spread his arms out to me, and I came closer so that he could hug my waist and burrow his head in my stomach.

I stroked his hair.

"Did something happen?"

"I had a bad dream."

I looked at the black fur under my hand.

That must have been a really crappy dream if he didn’t whine to me first thing after waking up.

Or maybe I was just too accustomed to him behaving like a kid. The more time we spent together, the more he really seemed to want to relive his childhood.

Well, his childhood was shitty... I swallowed down the bout of guilt, knowing that this guilt was something with which I had to live now.

When I think about it... I also only dreamed some bullshit together; first the crystal figure, then the giant... fuck.

I thought that by ’separating’ myself from the giant and having my power divided through the table in my mind, I would get rid of him.

Now I was even dreaming of becoming him.

"You are awake now. That’s all that matters." I told him, and myself as well.

He nodded but didn’t let go of me. I looked at my wrist, but I hadn’t put on the smartwatch, so I had no idea what time it was.

Anyway. Now that it was confirmed that nobody cared about what we were doing, which could be seen in the lack of consequences for coming late to lessons, beating up people, threatening a supervisor, and destroying her phone, we didn’t have to hurry.

Yesterday, after destroying the bathroom and cuddling an optimistic dog, I threatened Henry with throwing him out of my bed in the future if he cleaned up the bathroom alone.

So that was another task for today: getting the bathroom usable again. Should I ask the nurses for a new mirror?

And I still hadn’t received my new ankle monitor, so I could go and buy a mirror myself or teleport somewhere else, as long as I could do so without surveillance.

I saw Henry’s hand sneaking up, his head still unmoved against my stomach.

I raised my eyebrows, asking myself what he was doing when his finger landed on my chest, and he tapped against my skin twice.

Chuckling, I tried to reciprocate his gesture, but when I tried to peel him off me to be able to reach his chest, he stuck to me like glue, not letting go.

I needed to twist my arm under his arms to somehow reach his chest and tap twice.

Henry’s hold loosened a bit after I finished, and I felt him relax somewhat.

"You can tell me," I said, again combing through his hair.

"Do you have problems with your memory?" He asked.

That was random.

"I don’t know."

"How about the headaches?"

"Did something happen? Did I do something?" I was reminded of the screaming that even haunted me in my dreams; no idea why.

"Does your head hurt?" Henry asked me again.

"Right now? No."

"Mhm." His hold on me tightened again.

"What’s wrong?" I asked, but he didn’t answer.

Well, he hadn’t forced me to explain anything until now, so the least I could do was the same and just give silent support.

Though, I think I know of a way to cheer him up.

"So... because I didn’t want to steal your collar, I made money..."

Henry’s head abruptly turned up, his eyes fixating on me.

"You did?"

"Yeah. I didn’t understand their currency, but I could piece it together somehow. I went to play the cup game with the ball, you know."

"The three cups that they move around?" Henry’s complexion brightened.

"Mhm, so I played that and won continuously; the guy grew increasingly unhappy." I shrugged and chuckled.

"I bet you looked so cool while doing that. Did he do something to you?"

"Nah, I sneaked away when his patience ran out and went to buy it."

I touched the beauty mark under his eye, and he leaned into my touch like an adorable puppy.

Though I had found his mole a bit... gay... at the beginning, it was ultimately a mark—proof of his beauty. I liked it more the more I looked at it.

"Better now that you’ve heard about the troubles I went through to get you your present?" I asked.

"Yeah. Let’s go," Henry mumbled, still clinging to me until a while later when he finally stood up to change his clothes.

I did the same, and we went to eat breakfast.

Chelsea asked me if I was okay again and explained that they had agreed to board the water tanks yesterday because the supervisor woman promised them it would be the last time; they just needed to try, blablabla.

I nodded, my attention on Henry, who constantly looked at me, his gaze riddled with insecurity.

I had no idea what I had done, but he seemed to be greatly influenced by it.

Did I smack him or curse at him during my sleep? 𝚏𝕣𝐞𝗲𝐰𝕖𝐛𝐧𝕠𝕧𝚎𝚕.𝐜𝚘𝗺

Or... did I do something that I then erased from my memories?

Fuck. Maybe I should really talk to Dr. Lawrence; the headaches, the fever, this vision that was creepy enough to turn into strange nightmares... I don’t want to lose my mind, and it seemed that bloodletting wasn’t the answer.

I can understand that my body and brain struggle with the tremendous new power and the countless memories I had received, as the giant seemed to have lived for a few hundred years—but there must be a way for me to keep it together.

Can’t let this shit destroy me.

I knew then, and I know now, that killing one’s counterpart had never been the answer because my common sense told me from the beginning that killing something that was part of you would be wrong. Just as cutting off your arm was wrong—who would even think that would be a good idea?

But the universe had to cut me some slack—I didn’t kill the giant because I wanted his power or just because I was so fucking bored, but because he posed a threat to me and any world I’d have been in.

I am sure I wouldn’t be suffering from all these if I had merged peacefully with him like Henry did with his shadow, but would the giant have submitted himself if he wasn’t even in his right mind?

I chuckled.

Yeah, sure.

No way.