Extra's Descent-Chapter 362: An Unfamiliar Burden [1]

It took no time for Raven and Leon to return to Imperial Academy.

The two remained silent throughout the entire travel. Raven was frustrated with him.

But seeing the grim expression Leon had often made, Raven didn't voice out any of his frustrations.

For the both of them, their worries were unconfirmed.

Whether each of their allies would escape the tower alive or not.

But it fared better for Leon, who was confident his guild members would survive the ordeal.

Raven on the other hand, was nothing but a wishful hope.

In any case, they soon arrived at Imperial Academy.

Bang!

The door slammed open, and the two emerged into the room.

"...."

"...."

However, their return wasn't anything but unpleasant.

The tension was palpable in the room. Everyone wore grim expressions, some even pale.

And those pale expressions….

Were none other than his friends.

"Raven…."

Amy whispered barely audibly, and rushed towards him, locking him in an embrace.

"...."

However, Raven stood still, unable to reciprocate—his thoughts in disarray, the last moments of Brandon plaguing him.

Much to the point where he could only stare at the ceiling, inadvertently turning his gaze away from Amelia and Belle.

He couldn't meet their eyes.

Much more so than shame, he had felt an inexplicable amount of guilt.

There were several officers in the room as well. But they were currently focused on the task at hand.

Silence gripped the room. No one dared to utter any words.

Tak. Tak—!

But amidst the silence, the clicking of boots resounded. It was Bellion who was walking towards Raven and Leon.

"You did all you could."

Bellion assured him, gripping his shoulder. His face seemed to darken, and Raven turned his head away, gritting his teeth.

All he could?

He was weak.

He had barely done a thing to help Brandon during their ascensions.

And in the end, he had sacrificed himself just for Raven's survival.

If anything, Brandon deserved to live.

'....Not me.'

"Fuck."

He cursed.

Thwack!

And slapped himself, his cheeks turning red.

Deserved to live?

'Why am I thinking like this…?'

It was as if he was confirming in his heart that Brandon was dead.

But more than that, the thought of thinking ungratefully gnawed away at him.

"Leon."

Bellion looked at Leon, who stared back at him resolutely despite his own struggles.

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Leon responded, nodding his head. Bellion turned towards Raven and opened his mouth.

"If you'll excuse us, Raven. I need to speak with Leon."

"Of course."

Raven nodded. The two men walked away after that.

Then, Raven's head tilted down, staring at Amy, whose arms were still wrapped around him.

He couldn't see her face—it was pressed against his chest. But the way her shoulders trembled told him enough.

But still, Raven couldn't reciprocate her feelings back.

It wasn't the time for this.

It wasn't the—

"You."

Cutting off his thoughts, a certain voice resounded. Raven tried his best to look back at her—Belle—but the guilt in his heart remained.

All he could do was stare down.

"Look at me."

"...."

"You deaf? I said look at me."

"...."

The harshness in Belle's tone convinced him, and he belatedly raised his head up, meeting her gaze.

Belle was currently glaring at him, and he could see Amelia pulling her arm back, muttering, "It's not worth it."

'Haha.'

He laughed internally.

To think the person who should've been furious at him the most was trying to save him from the inevitable.

"Belle…."

Belle completely shrugged Amelia off and walked towards him. The sound of her heavy footsteps echoed in Raven's mind.

He had predicted this would happen.

He was all ready for it.

He clenched his fist.

'If only I was strong enough.'

'If only I wasn't a burden to him.'

'It's my fucking fault.'

All sorts of negative thoughts gnawed in his mind—his own way of consoling his vulnerability.

"You abandoned him."

Belle's cold voice echoed, washing away all his thoughts at that moment.

"You left him to die."

Raven stood still, allowing Belle to throw all sorts of curses at him.

But it was then when Amy pulled away from him, a single teardrop stained the floor.

"What are you saying!?"

Amy spat out, clenching her fist and glaring at Belle.

"Amy, stop. She's not wro—"

"That's unfair! Raven was struggling too! He doesn't deserve this!"

Amy exclaimed.

"If he was that weak, then why take the exam at all!? Why are you even here!?"

But Belle shot back, clenching her fist and raising her tone, immediately silencing Amy.

"You think this place is all fun and games!?"

"I…"

Amy stammered, unable to articulate her words.

"Please stop, General Locke. Leave her out of this. This is my fault to begin with."

Raven stepped forward, trying to protect any ounce of dignity Amy had.

Because from the looks the other cadets present were giving them, they seemed to be on Belle's side.

"I'm glad you understand that. Indeed, it is your fucking fault."

Belle cursed.

"Belle, stop it…."

Amelia tried pulling Belle back, holding onto her arm. But her dark expression told Raven all he needed to know.

She too seemed to hold disdain towards him, but out of the kindness in her heart, decided not to further complicate the issue.

"Amelia, what's wrong with you? You should be even angrier than me!"

"It's not worth it. Let's just all calm dow—"

"No."

Belle shook her head dismissively, cutting off Amelia's sentence.

"Is that how much he meant to you!? This guy…."

Belle pointed at Raven, who stood still, accepting all the harsh words.

"This guy fucking abandoned my brother!"

It may have seemed over the top. But as a soldier, desertion was akin to betrayal.

Of course, they didn't know that Brandon had specifically told him to leave him.

If anything, he wanted to tell them it was consensual.

But…. Raven couldn't.

The guilt wouldn't allow him.

Because during his struggles….

….He too had thoughts of abandoning Brandon.

The guilt in his heart was due to the relief he felt.

Relief that he had survived.

Relief that…. his insecurity was finally gone….

It was nothing but a fleeting thought.

But the fact that those thoughts even occurred….

He could only feel disgust for himself.

"I had lost my brother once…. I thought he was dead for a year…."

Belle gritted her teeth.

"....Damn it Brandon."

She clenched her face, a tear trickling down.

Belle's shoulders trembled, her hand covering her face, tears staining the floor.

No one could offer her any words of consolation.

Because the woman beside her—Amelia, she too was drowning in tears.

How couldn't they, when the last scene they had seen in the monitor was the sight of Brandon being pulled towards the horrifying treant's maw?

In their point of view, Brandon had died before their very eyes.

Even Amy couldn't utter any words, her head lowered, face darkened.

"Hey."

Belle's cold words resounded once again, uncovering her face and staring coldly at Raven.

"Do us all a favor and drop–out before another cadet gets abandoned."

Leaving off with those words, Belle turned around and walked away.

It was unfair.

Totally unfair.

The exams had clearly been tampered with. It wasn't as if Raven had wanted it to happen.

But he couldn't refute any of what Belle had told him.

Amelia stood still in front of Raven. She raised her head, meeting his gaze.

"...."

Her expressions were completely pale. Her eyelids seemed to have bloated, her eyes bloodshot.

"Don't misunderstand my silence. I can't forgive you. Firstly, as Brandon's girlfriend, and secondly, as an officer."

"Wait."

Before Amelia could walk away, Raven felt compelled to tell her something.

"I don't know if these words would console you. But…. just know that this is Brandon we're talking about. He wouldn't…. die that easily."

His wording had come out wrong, and now he feared if he had said the wrong thing.

"He told me to leave him. He must've had a plan. Please, believe in him."

Finally, the words stuck in the back of his throat finally escaped his mouth.

Words he had failed to say to Belle, a sister in grief, fearing that his words wouldn't reach her anyway.

"Please pass this message to General Locke. And…."

He lowered his head.

"I'm sorry."

With that, Amelia left him and Amy to their own devices.

Raven's fists tightened, staring down.

"Raven…. Forget what they said, it wasn't your fault…."

Amy's voice echoed, but it all went to deaf ears.

"Haaa…."

Raven took a deep breath and his shoulders slumped down.

He was exhausted.

"This place isn't for me."

*

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[AN]

I'd just like to announce that I've started a patreon in case any of you would like to support me outside of WN.

Link is in the synopsis, as well as my profile.