Debut or Die-Chapter 394
Lee Se-jin realized she was living a successful life.
She had broken through hundreds-to-one competition to become a trainee at a major agency, fought fiercely to survive within it, and ultimately debuted.
And among the dozens of idol teams that debuted that year, she had achieved the best results, even winning Rookie of the Year—and was riding high.
“Objectively... it’s success.”
She had expected to be happy. A prime filled with accomplishment.
But they say when your vantage point changes, so does the view.
“How ironic.”
She marveled at how she could feel anxious and stifled at the same time every day.
Teammates stuck in a rut, the company’s new plan that went nowhere, ideas disappearing against a wall.
Seeing what needed fixing but being powerless to act made a person lethargic.
“Hey, Lee Se-jin, tone it down, okay? Can’t you read the room? I’m fucking tired.”
“...Ugh, you’re right. I really am tired... But if we do it now, tomorrow will be easier, right? Let’s just go once~”
She knew reality and dreams were different. Even her boiling head had cooled.
Yet at times she felt irrationally wronged.
When moving between schedules, preparing the album, stealing a few moments of sleep at dawn.
“......”
That feeling of being duped surged in and then irritably subsided.
Maybe that was why the words of this survivor contestant she’d only just met struck her so deeply.
“Your efforts, though you haven’t noticed, produced valuable results elsewhere.”
Effort and achievement. Restoration of that cycle. That probably wasn’t the exact phrasing—but that’s how it sounded.
“What are you expecting?”
It might have been some lame online personality quiz floating around on social media. No, it probably was.
Something she’d blurted out to break the awkward mood after watching the concert.
Even so, she tensed and lunged. Couldn’t hold back.
“Go ahead.”
As if some button had been pressed.
“What the hell am I doing?”
Still, she didn’t want to retract. Lee Se-jin fell silent and stared at Ryu Geon-woo in front of her.
“......”
Ryu Geon-woo, embarrassed by the sudden silence, neither smiled nor opened his mouth to reply.
Instead, he raised his hand.
“...?”
And made a strange gesture, as if touching something in midair...
“...!!”
“Oh.”
In that moment, sensations exploded from her mind like fireworks.
It felt as if a dammed stream had broken free.
What had been there all along surged back into place.
“Thanks again for blocking my removal.”
“Our group is so great, though?”
“We’re going for a re-contract with TeSTAR. You all believe that, right~?”
Memories and emotions flooded her mind. Feelings once natural, countless memories born at life’s turning points, pain, excitement, inferiority, pride, victory.
Achievement.
Her place.
“I wish we could have one more day at the Seoul concert.”
“Right! Let’s do it.”
“Stop talking about impossible stuff and pack up first...”
“Yeah... Moon Dae, you’d be disappointed, too, right?”
“...Of course I am.”
“See? We’re all the same, right? Company messed up~ way too short~”
In that instant, Big Se-jin realized the source of her helplessness.
“Because I’ve lived my dream.”
Right.
She had already lived a life where effort was rewarded with achievement.
She knew even if she hit rock bottom, she could recover and challenge again—and that final challenge might succeed...
She knew what it felt like to live with trustworthy, admirable people and work passionately.
“......”
The dizzying rush ended. Lee Se-jin lifted her head. She saw her friend’s face, quietly checking on her condition.
A real teammate she hadn’t seen in a long time.
“My efforts’ results are somewhere else.”
Speaking in that quietly coaxing way was oddly out of character.
“You’re right.”
As he said.
The achievements she had poured her all into had existed elsewhere.
“They were... elsewhere.”
And they always had been.
“Ah~ Moon Dae, how do you always say the right thing?”
“...!”
Lee Se-jin laughed heartily.
Seeing Ryu Geon-woo—or rather, Moon Dae—his eyes widening in surprise at being recognized, felt indescribably delightful.
More than the confusion or curiosity at this surreal situation...
It was a refreshing relief.
In an instant, Lee Se-jin returned to Big Se-jin.
Since she’d already debuted in another group, she’d expected having to persuade a confused imposter might take some time...
“Moon Dae, you’re surprised I recognized you right away!”
[Gasp.]
Like flipping a switch, she was just back.
She didn’t even stagger. She had just dropped her head and then snapped it up.
And from his appearance, she instantly deduced the Moon Dae she knew, and now he leaned on the sofa, chuckling.
“How did you do this? Some... nanomachine that restores memories or something?”
“Where did you see that?”
“Webtoon?”
Seeing him laugh as if manic, she fell silent for a moment.
Had she... triggered something?
[You must be happy about this!]
Really?
Then... life in Jairope must have been shittier than expected. If so...
...maybe accumulating all that reputation experience wasn’t such a bad choice.
Recovering her composure, she spoke quietly.
“I’ll explain what’s happening now, so listen.”
“Ah~ I’m listening.”
Since he already knew all the details, she laid out the system’s runaway and everything.
He didn’t resent her or fuss about the cringe; he just listened seriously.
Being somewhat of a gamer, he even grasped the reputation XP concept fairly quickly.
Thanks to that, she was able to finish her explanation.
Or rather, intended to.
“So... with the reputation you gathered, you just summoned me...!”
The moment she said she’d summoned him, he almost lunged to hug her—if he hadn’t, in this context, it would’ve been an over-the-top reaction reserved for a No. 1 ranking or concert moment.
“Thanks.”
“...!”
“Actually, you didn’t even need to snap me out of it. I’d already debuted in another group... so we couldn’t work together anyway.”
“......”
He’d clearly wrestled with that more than she thought.
In any case, this wasn’t charity.
She tapped him on the back.
“No, I’ll use you as a spy.”
“...??”
“I want you to tell me about the current pop scene from someone who’s already debuted elsewhere.”
Big Se-jin looked blank, then burst out laughing.
Damn.
“Hahaha! That’s what you came up with? Ah~ Moon Dae, how can you be so honest~”
What the hell. In this bizarre world where years were mixed up and Cheongryeo’s knowledge was imperfect, gathering as much info as possible made sense.
“Alright, alright. Se-jin will feed us info~ promote us, put us on variety shows!”
He grinned.
“See? Moon Dae-Moon Dae, all good now, right?”
“Yeah, just do it properly.”
Stop laughing, you idiot.
As she considered forcing him to watch her early Jairope debut morning call video to make him scream, her phone rang.
Ding-ding-ding.
“Hey, we’re back!”
The door opened and those who’d gone grocery shopping returned.
Big Se-jin sprang up.
“Oh~ our members!”
“...! Se-jin’s back?”
“Ohhhh! Welcome home!”
Amid cheers, Big Se-jin burst out laughing.
“They’re saying welcome back to someone who was already home! You too, right, Yujin?”
“Heehee! Hyung!”
Passing them, Ryu Cheong-woo entered with a joyful face and placed groceries on the table.
“You said you might not restore my memory. So this is why you called today?”
“No, it’s a probability thing... And even if I summoned you, I can’t tell a functioning debuted group to disband.”
Then Big Se-jin began to sob dramatically.
“Krrrh... Moon Dae-Moon Dae, if you knew how much Se-jin suffered, you wouldn’t say that! Seriously... don’t talk about ‘functioning activities’!”
“Why?”
He’d even forgotten to feign crying, turning serious.
“Working with people who ⊛ Nоvеlιght ⊛ (Read the full story) deserve to fail is painful.”
“...? Saying they deserve to fail is a bit...”
“No. They really deserve to fail!”
“......”
Why would she fail with them, too?
Anyway, he showed no intention of compromising on that, so she didn’t push. Whether Jairope got flak or not was none of her concern.
Instead, the conversation shifted to what she and the other TeSTAR members had been doing.
They talked over grilled pork belly, one comment stacking onto the next.
“Wow~ you even exchanged numbers with Ah-hyun? Moon Dae, isn’t that favoritism? Didn’t you ask her first?”
“Did I?”
Ah-hyun must have asked first, you idiot. She recalled then deleted a memory of Ah-hyun here sending a random landscape photo.
She tried to stop thinking about it, but Big Se-jin had no such intention.
“The three of us could hang out again soon~ they said you just need the Daesang.”
Ambitious dreams.
“Daesang? Whose dog’s name is Daesang? You’ll get it soon.”
He smirked.
“Why not aim for the Digital Daesang?”
“...!”
“Why not? There’s Ra-bin~ you could piece together a Daesang song and just release it. Since this is all a dream, plagiarism doesn’t matter.”
Cha Yujin, looking a bit deflated, answered boldly.
“Don’t you remember Kim Ra-bin?”
“Huh? How did she even join the survival... ...Oh, you just brought her.”
“......”
“Poor Ra-bin, hope no one scams her again...”
It was irritating to hear the guy who would’ve scammed first scold as if shocked.
“So then just Ra-bin and Ah-hyun are left. Wow, I was late to check in, huh? How could you leave your bestie in another group...”
“It was random.”
You idiot, I had no control over that.
She ate her late-night snack while indulging him.
The chatter never stopped and there was nothing special... It already felt as if she’d returned.
Of course she hadn’t truly returned, so here they were.
“So, you’re still planning Jairope’s comeback prep, right?”
At Ryu Cheong-woo’s question, Big Se-jin took a gulp.
“I... wow, there’s so much to do.”
“...?”
“Oh, I guess I’m really twenty after all. My heart is so soft and kind~ Moon Dae, honestly I was moved—so innocent?”
“What?”
“Really. I got a lot worse deals.”
Hearing that from someone so obsessed with efficiency...
“You got any plans?”
He grinned.
“Yeah. First, I’m stopping by the salon.”
“...?”
“Why?”
“Gonna dye my hair.”
And the next morning.
The guy who’d stayed up almost all night talking dropped by his salon at dawn and got his dyed hair reverted to black, he said.
–Big Se-jin: If she re-bleached it, even tough Se-jin’s hair would melt, no way lol
A third-year rookie idol couldn’t possibly do that on her own right before a comeback. But Big Se-jin did. She’d honed her sociability to the extreme. And that’s apparently what she did before returning to the dorm...
[Lee Se-jin: Doing whatever feels right (U▽U~♪)]
I’ll just say that over half the time she checked that, it showed this status.
And that evening.
–Big Se-jin: Thank you for the invite, everyone’s names I know
That guy joined TeSTAR’s group chat, now five members strong.
And right after recovering her memory, the namesake who’d done something similar reacted like this.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: (welcoming hamster emoji)
I was surprised they seemed so friendly.
And honestly, I thought Big Se-jin would be embarrassed by what she’d said when she didn’t remember Bae Se-jin.
–Big Se-jin: Ah, hyung, didn’t you tease me so naturally last time? lolㅠㅠ
She even brought it up herself. The girl was something else.
–Big Se-jin: lol your tone still has no mercy, I was so shocked I almost swallowed my ribs through my nose
–Bae Se-jin hyung: No
–Bae Se-jin hyung: Keep playing the psychopath role
That probably wasn’t what he meant, but Big Se-jin did send a laughing bear emoji.
She typed:
–Did the dye job come in handy?
–Big Se-jin: Yup, look forward to Jairope’s next activities^^
Whatever she’d done, it seemed destined to either greatly extend or drastically shorten Jairope’s shelf life.
After enjoying Cha Yujin’s and Bae Se-jin’s cheers, Big Se-jin changed the topic.
–Big Se-jin: Anyway, Moon Dae needs to get famous so you can invite me to the group chat, right?
Did you really need to text that...?
–Big Se-jin: Hurry up and get famous so you can invite me to the chat. I’ll help you in every way lol
–Big Se-jin: Only this time will I let you do a unit activity without Se-jin, but when we return, Se-jin must get center.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: ?
–Big Se-jin: Not you, me
This time Cha Yujin sent a laughing emoji. Comedy gold.
[Hyung’s expression got better ㅠㅠ You must be in a good mood!]
Really?
Can’t hurt. She smirked as she watched the pointless banter pass through the group chat.
‘Maybe I’ll let them be for now.’
The real message finally came from Bae Se-jin.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: So... about your survival show.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: It’s the final live broadcast soon, right?
That’s right. Wise, LeTi’s survival show, which had broken out of its teacup storm with drama and stage play, was approaching its last broadcast.
‘I heard there’s one more elimination announcement mid-practice.’
She agreed without hesitation.
–Yes. Only a few days left.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: I’ll come support you.
“......?”
He really meant it.
‘Should I act like we’re close from now on?’
But weren’t you all about mystique until now? Won’t that destroy your psychopath image?
–Hyung, won’t your agency or handlers stop you?
And she got this reply immediately.
–Bae Se-jin hyung: Tell them to.
–Big Se-jin: (surprised bear emoji)
–Cha Yujin: That's cool! Amazing!
They were having a blast.
–Ryu Cheong-woo hyung: (sweat-smile emoji)
–Ryu Cheong-woo hyung: Anyway, let’s do our best in the final. Reminds me of AJUSA.
‘AJUSA?’
She gave a hollow laugh. No way that crazy show’s madness would repeat in the finale.
“Hah.”
Then, a voice came through the wall.
“Hyung, were you laughing at my Kakao messages?”
“...No, I was laughing at Big Se-jin.”
She realized Ryu Cheong-woo was in the next room the whole time.
She quietly fell silent and focused on the messages.
–Yes (dog emoji) Let’s fight.
She never imagined anything crazier would happen at the final.
