Card Apprentice Daily Log-Chapter 1928 Inner-Demons
Date- 18 April 2321
Time- 06:57
Location- Card World, Southern Region, Blossom District, Sky Blossom City, TSR Guild Headquarters, Blood Rock Cave Dungeon
Listening to Wyatt's reply a sly grin graced Cortney's lips. She had Wyatt right where she wanted him. With a gentle smile, she used Wyatt's words against him, "If you did not know of his plans and did not participate in his plans to harm us in any way, then why are you blaming yourself for what happened? Didn't you just say you will not blame Anna and Susan as long as they don't break your trust in them knowingly and willingly?"
"..." Wyatt was speechless, hearing Cortney use his words against him. But then shaking his head he said, "I don't blame myself because of Handsome Fox. I blame myself because I should have known that my enemies would try to harm those around me. I blame myself for not doing everything in my power to ensure your safety. If I had done my part to ensure your safety, someone like Handsome Fox would never have been able to get close to you guys let alone hurt you guys."
"Wyatt! Who do you think you are?" Cortney yelled, seeing Wyatt flip the metaphorical table on her. "I can understand you are unforgiving and intolerant of mistakes as it's harder for some people to trust others but this, this is madness. Who the fuck do you think you are? Answer me, who the fuck do you think you are? Are you god? Do you want to create an indestructible bubble around all the people you care about? Well, you can't, and for good reason. Because you are practically imprisoning the people you care about with your overprotective bullcrap. Wake up, or I will slap you silly until you wake up.
From what I recall, demigods from the Southern Royal family were guarding the city. Yet, he outsmarted them and lured us outside to complete his plan. When he can play with demigods what can you a card master do? Nobody is at fault here not Corey or the Southern Royal family or you. Yes, the demigods from the Southern royal family dropped the ball but it happens. The enemy was smarter than them. So stop suffering over what you happened and live the moment with us. You freaking managed to save all of us. This calls for celebration."
"Cortney, you don't understand. Things are not as simple, I managed to save you guys but there are still some things that I cannot take back. Corey blames herself for leading you guys to the dungeon I don't know if she can ever mentally recover from that, Bloodette was tortured by the dungeon seal she almost lost all the memories of you, and You were thrown in the blood-rule source it is a miracle you survived that long in there.
You guys would not have to go through all that if I had done my job as a good friend. The only reason you guys were targets was because you were my friends. You guys trusted me, and I became the reason for your pain and suffering. I cannot let that go," Wyatt revealed, he hated the fact that once again he was a source of pain and suffering for his friends. What had transpired back on Earth had repeated itself. Though he managed to save Cortney, Corey, Susan, and Bloodette, he couldn't save the friends back on earth. He can never save them.
"So what? Are going to stop being friends with us?" Cortney asked fearing the worst.
"No, I will try my best to be your friend," Wyatt declared resolutely.
"Well then, I have to tell you that you are not doing a job at being my friend right now," Cortney remarked.
"What do you mean?" Wyatt asked with a frown.
"You blaming yourself for something that was not your fault is causing me pain and suffering. Tell me, Wyatt, will you continue to let your twisted sense of friendship become the reason for the pain and suffering of your friends?" Cortney once again used Wyatt's words against him.
"I-I …" Wyatt was stuck, that's when he realized he was letting his past stop him from growing.
"I am sure none of us involved wants to see you blame yourself and feel guilty for what happened. If you continue to do that you are only causing us worry and pain. Wyatt, now you know what is causing your friend's pain and suffering, will you let it continue or decisively cut it from its roots?" Cortney asked Wyatt seriously, with a stern gaze.
"How can I not feel guilty for what happened? Otherwise, it would be like I am taking your friendship for granted. Taking you guys for granted. I would be like I am taking advantage of you guys, using you in my time of need and abandoning you when you needed me," Wyatt wasn't just saying this for the sake of argument. But it was something he was genuinely worried about.
Back on Earth, the families of his friends who died because of him blamed him for being selfish and using their big picture as a reason to mask it. During that period, Wyatt was also beginning to feel that he was taking advantage of his friends to achieve what he wanted. But he also understood that it was survivor's guilt getting the best of him.
"What the fuck are you talking about about? Do you want me to slap you, because right now I am really feeling like slapping you. Just wink for a slap or nod for a punch. Forget it, I am going to punch you anyway," Cortney prepared to punch Wyatt in the face, she had enough of his whining. But before her fist could reach Wyatt, Bloodette stopped her. Then looking at Wyatt who appeared to be struggling with his demons, she said, "Wyatt, it is okay to take advantage fo your friends. Besides, It's not taking advantage if your friends are okay with it."
