Alpha's Hidden Precious Luna-Chapter 53

Kai POV

Something was wrong!

I felt it even before she voiced it out. As Hud reached out to Lily’s wolf, ready to initiate the marking process, I felt resistance. Where there should have been an open channel, a merging of our wolves.

It was as if an invisible wall had been erected between us, blocking the connection I so desperately craved. I froze when I heard her plea, hating the way she moved away from me... confusion and frustration washed over me in equal measure.

Hud growled in displeasure, feeling the rejection in a way that stung deeper than I’d anticipated.

“Please! Let’s stop!” she said, pushing farther from me.

I pulled back, confusion and hurt etched across my features. Searching her eyes for answers. “Lily,” I said, trying to hide the pain in my voice. “What’s wrong? Did I... did I do something to upset you? Do you not... want this?”

She blinked, her expression filled with a mix of uncertainty, hesitation and guilt. “No, Kai, it’s not... I mean, I don’t...” she trailed off, she bit her lip, glancing away, clearly struggling to find the right words. “I... It’s not that, Kia. It’s just...”

She trailed off again and my mind raced. What could be causing this disconnect? She was ready to be mated to me only moments ago? And then, like lightning, a memory struck me. There was only one explanation for the hesitation, one that I had hoped wasn’t true but gnawed at the back of my mind since I first saw the stranger in her bedroom.

The man Liam had been investigating.

Lucas.

The name tasted bitter on my tongue, even unspoken. I’d learned bits and pieces about Lily’s past in the days since her father left the pack. Enough to know that the stranger in her room from that night had been more than just a friend.

Of course, I’d figured out that the man was someone important to her and discovered later that both of them had been engaged, and had almost mated. The jealousy that surged through me now as I remembered the report from Liam was almost unbearable.

But I tamped it down, forcing myself to remain calm.

“Is it him?” I asked, trying to keep the anger out of my voice. “Are you still thinking about him? Lucas?”

The way she flinched at the name was answer enough. My chest tightened and I felt as if I’d been punched in the gut, all the air leaving my lungs in a rush. She didn’t respond right away, and that hesitation – those few seconds of silence – was the confirmation I needed. I let her go and stood up abruptly, slipping on my discarded clothes and passing her, hers.

I paced the room silently waiting for her to dress up running a hand through my hair before I faced her again.

“Are you still in love with him?” My voice cracked, “Do you want him, Lily?”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “I didn’t mean to... it’s just all so confusing for me. Everything’s happening so fast and I...”

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath to centre myself. When I opened them again, I fixed her a steady gaze. “Just tell me,” I said simply. “Help me understand.”

She looked up at me, her eyes wild, but her silence was damning. I clenched my fists, trying to keep my emotions under control. It felt like Hud was clawing at my insides, furious and hurt by the idea that she might still be tied to another.

“I don’t know,” she finally whispered, her voice soft, almost too quiet to hear. “I don’t know how I feel.”

My heart sank at her words but I forced myself to stay calm. “You don’t know?”

She bit her lip, her hands twisting in the bedsheets. Then she shook her head, her eyes filling with unshed tears.

“It’s ... complicated, Kai. Lucas and I ... we have history. A lot of history. For the longest time, I thought he was my mate. We were going to ...” she trailed off, shaking her head. “But then everything fell apart. He rejected me, Kai. He said I wasn’t wolf enough for him. But before that, he was a big part of my life. I thought we were going to be together forever. I thought he was my future.”

My jaw tightened; my chest ached with every word she said. “But he rejected, you, Lily, didn’t he? Isn’t it enough grounds not to think about him? Especially now that your wolf has awakened.”

“I don’t know!” she admitted again. “When I saw him that night before you arrived... something stirred. My wolf recognized him. But it also recognized you.” She looked up at me, her eyes pleading for understanding. “I’m torn, Kai. I feel pulled in two directions and I don’t know which way is right.”

“Goddamit, Lily!” I growled, “Is it so hard to figure out who truly wants you?”

She winced, as though the truth of my words physically hurt her. “He didn’t know about my wolf. He thought...”

“He thought you were weak,” I finished for her coldly. “And now you think I’m just a replacement?”

Her eyes widened in shock. “No, Kai. It’s not like that!”

“Then what is it like?” my voice rose slightly, my frustration was boiling over. “Because from where I’m standing, it feels like you’re still holding on to someone who hurt you, who didn’t believe in you. Meanwhile, I’m standing right here, your true mate and you won’t even let me in.”

Her tears finally spilled over, her cheeks turning wet with streaks of her tears. “I’m trying, Kai. I really am. But it’s hard. Everything with Lucas ... still feels unresolved. I can’t just erase those feelings overnight. We were together for years and he...used to love me and I love – loved him back.”

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. Hud was pacing angrily in my mind but I couldn’t let my emotions get the best of me now. Not when Lily was clearly struggling.

“I understand that it’s complicated,” I said my voice softening. “But you have to make a choice, Lily. You can’t have both of us. You can’t also keep holding on to the past while standing in the present.”

She wiped her tears, with the back of her hand, nodding her head. “I know...I know that.”

I watched her, my heart still aching for her, even though a part of me was still furious. “Do you still want to be with him?” I saw myself asking even though it felt like I was going to die from those words alone. “Is that what you want?”

Her lips trembled and for a moment, I thought she might say yes. That she would choose Lucas. But then, she shook her head.

“I don’t know,” she whispered again. I don’t want to lose you either.”

My heart leapt at her words but the barrier between us was still there, blocking the full connection I desperately needed.

“I can’t be second, Lily,” I said quietly, my voice filled with sadness. “I can’t be the one you settle for because you don’t want to be alone.”

Her face crumpled, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. “You’re not second, Kai. I just... I need time.”

I nodded then stepped closer to her, gently cupping her face in my hand. “I’ll give you time, Lily. But I need you to understand something.”

She looked up at me...

“I’m your mate!” I said firmly “That bond between us? It’s real and it’s stronger than anything you had with Lucas. But you have to choose to let it in. You have to choose us.” I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead, trying to ignore Hud whimpering in the distance between us. 𝑓𝓇𝘦ℯ𝘸𝘦𝑏𝓃𝑜𝘷ℯ𝑙.𝑐𝑜𝓂

“I’ll be waiting, but not forever!”