Living Only For Myself: Make Those Who Hate Me Regret It
Chapter 330 - 327: "Shen Chen, You’re Such a Good Person.
This is basically sexual harassment!
Who asks a girl these kinds of questions?!
Xu Su sensed something was off with Shen Chen. She felt far too vulnerable lying half-reclined in front of him, so she propped herself up on her hands, about to sit up.
The next second, Shen Chen gently pushed her back down by the shoulders. "Just lie down. I won’t ask anymore."
Shen Chen took a step back. His lips were pressed into a tight line, his face devoid of expression, which was actually a little frightening.
He was silent for a moment before looking down at her again. "Was it consensual?"
"..." ’Didn’t you say you wouldn’t ask anymore?!’
’If it wasn’t consensual, was Zhou Mochen going to force me or something?!’
Xu Su was mortified, but she knew deep down that his question came from a place of genuine concern. After all, Shen Chen had seen the huge fight she and Zhou Mochen had in the private room last night. He was probably afraid she’d been coerced by Zhou Mochen’s power and influence...
The thought moved her. She nodded. "Don’t overthink it. Of course it was consensual. He would never force me."
Zhou Mochen truly doted on her, yielding to her every whim. The only time he was ever dominant was in bed...
Memories from last night flooded her mind. Xu Su’s eyelashes fluttered, and she reached out to push him. "Shen Chen! Stop asking about this!"
Her blushing face was a breathtaking sight, a picture of absolute beauty.
But the sight filled Shen Chen’s heart with bitterness. He didn’t even know why, knowing she was another man’s girlfriend, he still couldn’t stop himself from coming to witness this with his own eyes.
’Why do I keep running to Chang City like I’ve lost my mind? I know she can never be mine. I know I’ll probably never be able to hold her in my arms in this lifetime.’
’But I came, time and time again. On the rare occasions she called, I couldn’t control the joy that bloomed in my heart.’
’Even just a few simple words could put me in a good mood for days.’
’It’s pathetic. To think that I, Shen Chen, could be so completely captivated by a woman.’
’I remember a few years ago, one of my buddies was tormented by love. I casually joked that women were creatures you could sleep with but never spoil, let alone love.’
’There were only two reasons a man would be fixated on one woman.’
’Either he hadn’t gotten her into bed, or he hadn’t had enough of her in bed.’
’Back then, I spoke of women with brazen contempt, convinced there was nothing more to the relationship between a man and a woman than those two things.’
’And the proof came when my love-tormented friend, not even half a year after winning the girl over, lost that single-minded devotion. He quickly found that being with just one woman was utterly dull.’
’That only strengthened my conviction.’
’Until I met Xu Su, I was used to a life of pleasure-seeking.’
’I wasn’t that old, but I’d already been with many women—the innocent and charming, the sultry to the bone, the cool and indifferent.’
’I’d tasted every flavor. There was a bit of novelty at first, but after a few times, it all felt the same.’ 𝗳𝐫𝚎𝗲𝚠𝚎𝗯𝕟𝐨𝘃𝚎𝗹.𝗰𝗼𝗺
’I even tried older, married women.’
’In my younger, wilder days, for the sake of a thrill, I’d even played games with three or four people...’
’I thought I had seen through all the love and romance in the world. If nothing unexpected happened, in another seven or eight years, I would have found a reasonably pleasant woman to marry. She wouldn’t need a prestigious background; she just needed to be docile and not try to control me. Then I would have continued playing around for the rest of my life.’
’But then, I met Xu Su. And the unexpected happened.’
’That summer, in the car, when I kissed her petal-soft lips, my heart pounded uncontrollably. Even at the age when I should have felt the first stirrings of love, my heart had never been so moved.’
’I rarely kissed anyone, let alone forced a kiss, but I did it that day.’
’I even came up with a high-sounding excuse that she still firmly believes to this day.’
’I usually can’t stand it when women cry. But that day, she cried so hard her makeup was a mess, and far from being annoyed, my heart ached. I wanted to pull her into my arms and comfort her. I wanted to kill everyone who had ever hurt her.’
’At that moment, I thought, maybe there was a third reason a man becomes fixated on a woman.’
’A possibility that terrified me...’
’Why did I fall in love with Xu Su?’
Shen Chen had seriously pondered this question. In terms of looks, she was indeed beautiful. She’d only gotten more beautiful over the past two years since they first met.
It might be hard to find someone more beautiful than Xu Su, but Shen Chen was never short of beauties. Even if they weren’t as pretty as Xu Su, it wasn’t some great loss.
Besides, his feelings for Xu Su weren’t about the thrill of the chase. It wasn’t a matter of seeing her beauty and feeling he had to conquer her to be satisfied.
On the contrary, he had never entertained lustful thoughts about her. He never once wondered if sleeping with her just once would resolve this obsession, making him realize she was nothing special after all.
His feelings for Xu Su were so carefully guarded that he didn’t dare let her find out. Forget satisfying his desires; just getting a pleasant look from her was enough to make him content.
To this day, Shen Chen couldn’t accept that such a... humble emotion could exist within him.
He wasn’t a generous person. He was the type who sought revenge for the smallest slight, who expected a tenfold return for a threefold investment. But with Xu Su, he hid his feelings, terrified she would distance herself if she ever found out.
He poured his heart into carefully selecting gifts for her, afraid she wouldn’t accept them, racking his brain to trick her into believing he only saw her as a friend...
’Friend, my ass.’
’God knows, I’ve never been friends with a woman.’
Shen Chen’s expression was complicated, indescribable. Watching him, Xu Su felt a little flustered.
Fortunately, it wasn’t long before he returned to normal.
A smile returned to his lips. Shen Chen sighed softly. "Xu Su, if you ever seriously want to break up with Brother Zhou, you can tell me. How about I protect you?"
He still remembered how she had insisted the day before yesterday that it didn’t count when she was the one who said they should break up.
’How about I protect you...’
Xu Su was dumbfounded.
’I never thought Shen Chen could be this loyal!’
’This is Zhou Mochen we’re talking about!’
’Zhou Mochen!’
’What was Shen Chen promising?’
’If she wanted to break up with Zhou Mochen one day, he would protect her?’
’He would go against Zhou Mochen for her sake?’
Her eyes widened in shock. "Shen Chen, you’re... a surprisingly good guy."
"...You’re only just realizing that now?" Shen Chen sat down again, his eyes filled with resignation. "Xu Su, for the sake of how good I am to you, try to dislike me a little less from now on, okay?"
Xu Su looked completely innocent. "When have I ever disliked you?!"
Aside from their first few meetings, where she’d snapped at him a few times because of her prejudices from a past life, Xu Su had genuinely treated Shen Chen as a real friend for over a year now.
Having Shen Chen as a friend was an amazing deal.
He was loaded, loyal, and had a great temper.
As she thought about it, her eyes started to sparkle as she looked at Shen Chen. "I really don’t dislike you. Seriously, Shen Chen, if friends like you came by the dozen, I’d take a dozen."
"In your dreams." Shen Chen shot her an exasperated glare. "You think I’m that cheap, that you can get me by the dozen? You couldn’t find another one like me in all of Beijing, understand?"
Xu Su sniffled, admitting to herself that she was being a little greedy.
Young Master Shen was one of the figures at the very apex of Beijing’s social pyramid. Among the handful of preeminent, powerful families, the Shen family was not far behind the Zhou family.