I'm a weak Exorcist, and the Yanderes Around Me Aren't Human
Chapter 59: takeout
The passenger door opened.
Natsume came around the front of the car.
Small frame, short dark hair tucked behind one ear, coat buttoned straight to the collar.
Her face gave nothing away unless she wanted it to.
She looked at Kaito against the wall. Then at Hiro still laughing beside the driver’s door. Then back at Kaito again.
Her expression barely shifted.
She had known exactly what Hiro was about to do and had sat there and let him do it anyway.
"He almost drove into me," Kaito complained as if she would help.
"I stopped," Hiro said immediately, wiping under one eye. "You jumped like three feet. Did you see yourself?"
"I didn’t see myself."
"You went completely sideways." Hiro laughed again and pointed at him. "Like a fucking cat getting launched off furniture."
He looked at Natsume.
"You saw it right?"
"I saw it."
Kaito looked at her in disbelief.
"What is wrong with you two. It’s not funny."
"Nobody almost died. Relax." Hiro was still grinning.
Kaito pushed himself properly off the wall. Pain flared through his shoulder immediately.
Hiro noticed.
"Oh my god, you actually hurt yourself."
"Whose fault is that?"
"Yours. For being so weak."
Hiro started laughing again.
There was something uniquely exhausting about hearing somebody almost cry laughing over your fear response.
"What are you doing here," Kaito asked.
"We had a job nearby yesterday." Hiro shrugged. "Finished it. Thought we’d stop by and see how the clan embarrassment was surviving city life."
"Go home."
"Checked out this morning."
"Then drive home."
"It’s a long drive."
"I genuinely do not care."
Hiro grinned wider at that.
"See? You’ve gotten meaner."
"I always hated you."
That actually got a sharper laugh out of Hiro.
Natsume watched the exchange quietly, hands still in her coat pockets.
Kaito turned and unlocked the gate.
Hiro followed him through immediately.
Natsume followed behind him.
Kaito stopped halfway up the path and looked back at them.
"I didn’t invite either of you."
Hiro walked past him toward the front door.
"When the fuck have you ever invited anyone anywhere."
Kaito hated that answer because it was true.
He unlocked the front door and stepped inside.
The apartment was warm from the heater. Quiet. Safe.
Then Hiro walked into the kitchen and the feeling disappeared almost immediately.
Kaito set the ramen on the counter and turned around.
Hiro already had a cabinet open.
"Close my cabinets."
"You have nothing in them," Hiro said, shutting one and opening the next. "Rice. Tea. Sauce packets." He looked back at Kaito. "This is genuinely how you’re living?"
"Close them."
"There’s not even snacks." Hiro opened another cabinet. "You come home every night to this?"
"There’s ramen."
"For one person."
"Yes. For me. One person. Who lives here. Alone. By choice."
Natsume stood near the wall with her arms folded now, quietly looking around the apartment.
The small kitchen table.
The books stacked beside the kotatsu table.
The drying rack near the sink.
The silence.
"You really don’t bring people here," she said. ,"Still single?"
Kaito looked at her.
"What gave it away."
"The atmosphere."
Hiro snorted and opened the fridge.
Kaito’s irritation snapped immediately.
"Stop opening my things."
"What?" Hiro looked over his shoulder. "I’m checking if you’re secretly living better than this looks."
"Get out of my kitchen."
"You’ve gotten hostile."
"You drove a car at me."
"And stopped."
"You are still in my house."
Hiro laughed under his breath and finally shut the fridge.
Then he dropped into one of the kitchen chairs like he owned the apartment.
Natsume sat across from him, posture straight, coat still on.
Kaito stayed standing for another few seconds with one hand still tight around the ramen container.
He already knew how tonight was going to go.
Hiro kept pushing until he found something that got a reaction. Once he found it, he stayed there.
Pushed harder. Repeated it. Circled it until the other person got angry or shut down completely.
Kaito especially.
It had always been Kaito especially.
He put the kettle on harder than necessary.
"You drink that terrible cheap tea?" Hiro asked.
"Yes."
"Fucking depressing."
"Then leave."
"You keep saying that while making tea for us."
"I’m making tea because if I don’t you’ll stay longer out of spite."
Hiro looked genuinely delighted by that answer.
"Oh, he really does hate us now."
"Obviously I hate you."
Natsume glanced between them once.
"Hiro thought you’d mellow out after leaving."
"I said maybe."
"You said definitely."
"I was optimistic."
Kaito rubbed a hand hard down his face.
Less than an hour ago Mei had been kissing him goodbye on a station platform with both hands holding the front of his jacket.
Now Hiro was opening his cabinets and calling his life depressing.
The emotional whiplash made his head hurt.
He put three cups down on the table harder than intended.
Tea splashed lightly over the rim.
Natsume noticed immediately.
"Your hands are shaking."
"Can you stop noticing everything."
"You stopped shaking after we entered the house." She tilted her head slightly. "You started again when Hiro mentioned the estate."
Kaito looked at her flatly.
Natsume had always been worse in a quieter way.
Hiro pushed directly.
Natsume noticed things you didn’t want noticed and placed them carefully on the table for everyone else to look at.
Hiro leaned back in his chair.
"So. General Arts."
"Yeah."
"The fuck do you even do with that." 𝚏𝕣𝐞𝗲𝐰𝕖𝐛𝐧𝕠𝕧𝚎𝚕.𝐜𝚘𝗺
"Study."
"No shit."
Kaito sat down with his ramen.
Hiro watched him peel the lid back.
"You seriously come home to this every day?" he asked again, looking around the apartment.
"It’s cheap."
"It feels lonely."
Kaito opened the chopsticks.
"It’s quiet."
"That’s not the same thing."
Kaito looked up at him.
"What exactly are you trying to accomplish here tonight?"
Hiro shrugged.
"I was curious."
"About what."
"You."
Kaito laughed once through his nose.
"Bullshit."
"Seriously." Hiro gestured around the apartment. "You disappeared from the estate six months ago. Now you’re living in a tiny apartment eating ramen alone while studying a degree nobody respects."
"Sounds like you answered your own question."
Hiro grinned slightly.
"Yeah, but I thought there’d be more damage."
Kaito stopped moving for half a second.
Natsume noticed immediately.
"There it is," Hiro said softly, seeing it too. "That face."
Kaito looked back down at his food.
"He won’t answer now," Natsume said.
"I know." Hiro leaned back again. "Do you remember that assessment? The containment drill where you sealed yourself inside your own barrier?" He smiled. "I still think about that sometimes."
Kaito drank his tea.
"Or the practical exam where your output reading was so low that the teacher thought you didn’t start yet." Hiro shook his head slowly.
"Hiro," Natsume said quietly.
"What? It’s funny."
"It was ten years ago."
"And it’s still funny."
Kaito set the tea down harder than intended.
The sound cracked through the kitchen.
Hiro’s eyes lit up immediately.
"There he is."
"Shut the fuck up, Hiro."
Hiro laughed under his breath.
"See, that’s what I mean. You used to just sit there and take it."
"I still am."
"No, now you actually look pissed off." Hiro tilted his head slightly. "Honestly it doesn’t change anything."
Kaito looked at him across the table.
"I want both of you out of my house."
Hiro opened his mouth to answer.
bzzzz
Then Kaito’s phone buzzed against the table.
The sound cut through the kitchen cleanly.
Kaito looked down automatically.
Mei: did you get home okay?
The tension in his shoulders loosened before he could stop it.
A tiny shift.
Barely anything.
Hiro noticed immediately.
His grin widened slowly.
"Oh no," he said softly.
Kaito reached for the phone.
Too late.
Hiro grabbed it first.
"Give it back."
"Mei?" Hiro’s eyebrows lifted. "Who’s Mei?"
Kaito stood up immediately.
"Hiro."
But Hiro was already reading.
Then his whole expression changed.
Slow disbelief.
Then absolute delight.
"No fucking way."
Natsume held her hand out without even looking up.
Hiro passed her the phone automatically.
Kaito moved around the table immediately.
"Natsume, give it back."
"Hold him," she said calmly.
Hiro stood at the exact same second.
The chair scraped sharply against the floor.
Then Kaito’s arms were yanked back hard against his sides before he could reach across the table.
Kaito slammed backward into Hiro immediately, trying to throw him off balance.
Hiro barely moved.
Kaito felt the difference instantly and hated it.
"Get the fuck off me."
"Relax." Hiro sounded openly entertained near his ear. "We’re meeting your girlfriend."
Natsume scrolled quietly.
"’Goodnight boyfriend,’" she read aloud.
Kaito felt heat hit his face instantly.
"Give me the fucking phone."
"’Goodnight girlfriend,’" Natsume continued. She looked up once. "She said it first."
Hiro made a strangled sound beside him.
"No. No, wait." He tightened one arm around Kaito’s chest because Kaito was already trying to wrench free again. "She actually calls you boyfriend? Cringeee"
"Give it back."
Natsume kept scrolling.
"She texts carefully," she observed. "She edits almost all of her texts."
Kaito froze for half a second.
Natsume noticed that too.
"She’s shy," Kaito snapped before he could stop himself.
Silence.
Then Hiro completely lost it.
He bent forward laughing hard enough that Kaito almost slipped free accidentally.
"Hiro—"
"The clan’s weakest disappointment has a girlfriend, while I am busy slaying ghosts" Hiro shook his head in complete disbelief. "This is unbelievable. The universe is actually fucking broken."
Kaito twisted hard and finally tore one arm loose.
He lunged across the table immediately toward Natsume.
"Natsume! Give my phone"
She looked up at him at the exact same moment he reached her.
She moved.
One step back. Quick. Clean. The phone disappearing behind her before his fingers reached it.
Kaito grabbed for her wrist anyway.
His fingertips brushed her sleeve.
Then Hiro’s arm locked hard around his waist from behind.
Kaito felt the grip tighten across his stomach and ribs.
Strong.
Too strong.
The realization hit immediately and pissed him off even more.
"Get the fuck off me—"
He drove his elbow backward hard.
Hiro barely shifted.
Kaito tried to wrench himself sideways anyway, planting one foot against the floor to throw his weight forward again toward Natsume.
Hiro yanked him back at the exact same moment.
Kaito’s foot slipped.
The floor disappeared under him.
His hip slammed into the edge of the chair first. The chair legs screeched violently across the floor.
Then his forehead hit the corner of the table.
A flat crack.
Bright pain exploded through the left side of his face instantly.
Kaito heard himself make a short sound through clenched teeth as his knees smashed into the floor next.
Nobody spoke.
Kaito stayed bent over for a second with one hand against the ground and the other pressed hard against his forehead.
Heat spread between his fingers immediately.
Too warm.
He pulled his hand away enough to look.
Blood slid down across his knuckles and dripped from the side of his thumb onto the kitchen floor.
The room stayed quiet.
Kaito looked up slowly.
Hiro wasn’t laughing anymore.