Uzumaki: I can comprehend anything - Chapter 590: Uzumaki Basic Ninjutsu

Su Qinglan sat cross-legged on the grass, holding the chubbiest tiger cub she’d ever seen.“Aww… Look at you,” she whispered, booping its tiny nose. “So cute I could eat you up...”A sudden shadow loomed over her.“What’s so good about this stinky cub?” a deep, amused voice asked.She blinked up… and froze.Towering above her was a tall tiger beast man, his golden eyes narrowed in a lazy, predatory smile.“Let’s have ours,” he said.Su Qinglan’s brain short-circuited.… Ours? OURS?!Before she could process, in the next moment she was hoisted up onto his broad shoulder like a sack of grain and carried straight toward the cave.Su Qinglan was so choked by the suddenness of it all… she forgot to even complain.***Su Qinglan’s knees knocked together as she stared up at the enormous serpent.Its cold, red eyes narrowed, the flick of its tongue tasting the air between them.“D-Don’t eat me,” she stammered, hugging herself. “I...I’m not tasty… really, I’m stringy and full of… uh… bad cholesterol.”The snake’s head lowered until it was mere inches from her face. Her fox ears twitched wildly.And then, before she could blink...its massive body shimmered, scales turning into bronzed skin and lean muscle.Standing before her was a man so breathtakingly handsome that Su Qinglan’s poor fox eyes watered just looking at him.Su Qinglan swallowed hard, her tail fluffing up in panic.“I… I…” Her voice cracked.Okay, new problem… the snake is hot.She squeezed her eyes shut.“If you… if you really want…” She blurted, her face burning, “…y-you can… take me.”***One moment Su Qinglan was fighting with the zombie king with all her might.Boom!The next, she woke up in a bizarre beast world… inside the body of a lazy, pampered, fat local tyrant everyone hated.The “original” Su Qinglan had been an arrogant, scheming villainess who spent her days bullying weaker beast women, chasing after handsome males, and terrorizing the tribe kids. Now, thanks to fate’s twisted sense of humor, Qinglan had inherited the body and the bad reputation.But honestly? Being fat in a beast world was still better than starving in the apocalypse. At least here, she could eat.The only problem? In this world, men weren’t just men, they were beastmen. Tall, strong, dangerous… And apparently, every beast woman was expected to have several husbands. The catch? The “original” Qinglan’s antics had scared away every decent male within a ten-mile radius.Armed with her apocalyptic survival instincts, a sharp tongue, and a mysterious system that suddenly activated...“Binding with host…“”Congratulations, host, for successfully arriving in the beast world.“Qinglan decided she wasn’t going to cry about fate.If she had to live here, then she’d live big, literally.

Su Yue is a high school student in the world where almost everyone dreams to be a martial artist. Though Su's father is a renowned martial artist, Su has to work as a deliveryman to pay his school fees for his father has been sent to jail and didn't leave even a penny to him. However, a mysterious customer changes Su's life.“You don't need to worry about that, my bounty is one million now, why don't you sell me?”“After taxes, you could keep 600,000.”“So many taxes, I wish I were a martial artist, then I could keep 900,000 of the million!”

There once was a very popular question on the internet:

If one morning, you woke up and realized that your gender had changed, what would be your first reaction?

And someone on the internet had famously responded:

First, give your bros a good time!

Su Jian remembered that when he saw this reply, he had slapped the table to express his admiration. What a good bro! Such loyalty!

But now that he actually encountered this strange situation himself, he could only feel an extremely ball-breaking alarm, shocked grief, and frightened anger. **** your mom! Ah, ****! **** it!

Oh, a correction. The above is grammatically incorrect. After all, poor Classmate Su Jian doesn’t have balls anymore.

Childhood, upbringing, family background, social relations, traumatic experiences…

We keep reviewing and seeking out the motives of criminals, exploring the subtlest emotions driving them. It’s not to put ourselves in their shoes and sympathize, or even forgive them; it’s not to find some reasons to exculpate their crimes; it’s not to kneel down before the so-called “complexity of human nature”; nor to introspect social conflicts, much less to alienate ourselves into monsters.

We just want to have a fair trial – for ourselves and for those who still have hope for the world.

A seme thug specialized in dealing with various kinds of disobedience vs. a cowardly and dissolute uke descended from a rich family

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