Two and Half Men - Reborn as Jake Harper - Chapter 6: Soccer, Suffering, and Single Moms

In this world, human are in peril. 72 Obelisks suddenly appeared out of nowhere, infecting the world with Monsters. Amongst this chaos, people look for hope.

A man named Basil Pacifer is the humanity's hope. He is the strongest Mage alive at that point. Sadly, he believes in no man, and he always moves alone.

...

Basil observes the unfolding scene bitterly. He is aware of his impending doom, however he has no grudge. He has lived long enough to achieve things people can only dream about.

Looking back to his past, he realized his life is nothing more than a sad story.

Closing his eyes, he accepted his end — or so he thought.

...

”Look at me! What do you see?“

”Regrets.“

”Don't you want to undo it?“

”Tell me what the offer is.“

Thus, Basil Pacifer returned to the past, being his younger self once again. Of course, he returned back with something.

...

[Ding!]

[Guide to Omniscience is successfully merged with The Chosen One]

[Analyzing The Chosen One's mental capability...]

[Analyzation Complete!]

[Result: The Chosen One is retarded]

[Initiate Brain Configuration!]

No matter how useless the golden finger he received seems, he will reach a higher height than his last life. This time, he will completely erase any regrets he has!

Crossing the prehistoric times, Chen Changsheng bowed to Tongtianmen and became the most sturdy senior brother of the Intercepting Sect, awakening the reading system.

Read [Holy King], extract the god statue, and automatically upgrade it to the immortal way.

Read [Perfect], extract the self-indulgence method of his transformation, and automatically upgrade it to chaos and self-inflicted law.

Read [Star Change], extract the method of stars, and automatically upgrade Hongmeng Star Change.

…

Just like that, relying on reading from the heavens, Chen Changsheng became the first person to communicate with each other in the past and present.

- Description from novelbuddy

I killed the protagonist.Yeah. He was a real son of a bitch.Noah didn’t just stumble into this mess. He walked straight in—grinning, sword in hand.One day, he wakes up inside his favorite game… as a throwaway side character no one remembers. A complete nobody. But when he figures out who the so-called “main character” is?Some smug, self-righteous psycho.So yeah—he killed him. No regrets.Story over, right?Not exactly.Because this world? It’s got one more player.“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?”Now the story’s off the rails, the world’s gone completely off-script, and Noah’s got a new goal:Steal the hero’s spot. Rewrite the plot. Find out who the hell this other player is. And maybe—just maybe—make this damn story fun for once.

There’s SIS in great Britain, CIA in the US. In Huaxia, there’s Dragon Division, known as the mysterious power of the East.

When a soldier that originally failed to be selected to join, appeared on the Dragon Division’s list again, no one noticed, that this inconspicuous and humble looking guy was actually the Dragon King of the division, the one that’s most difficult to deal with.

He was a man, whose appearance gave every one existential crisis, including a fly that was consecutively caught by him with a pair of chopsticks.

Of course, this story is hilarious as well.
[Shen Yao laughed. “You think I would help you? For what reason?”

Xu Cheng sighed. “Shen Yao, to be honest, you are really pretty.”

“Humph.” Shen Yao snorted coldly, “Can you elaborate on that for me?”

“I don’t know how to get into details, but I can only say that when I accidentally tore your skirt today, I got a boner.” ]

- Description from Novelupdates