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... nted to go back to living as me. I couldnt bear to forget or abandon myself I just wanted to live the way I was born. I thought I should give it another chance because it became painful for me to keep denying myself. Thats why Im now trying to get my name back, but that alone is already too hard. I realise once again that Im only just a beggar. So, if you want to make me more miserable, go on, keep saying nice things like that!

The reckless outpour of words was new to Lil.

I have ...

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