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... d his face, "This one is not called a bandit, this one is called a locust. When a locust crosses the border, no armor will be left behind, you know that?"

   "Little uncle, I know, I know, it's grasshoppers. We used to roast grasshoppers, but they were delicious, like shrimps."

   "Let's go, let's catch grasshoppers..."

Mrs. Ye slapped Ye Chenghai on the back of the head unceremoniously, "Grassing trees, there is a lot of work waiting for you to do, how dare you run? Your le ...

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“Y-young master, the Lord is requesting your presence.”

I looked at myself in the mirror as a maid's voice, laced with trepidation, reached my ears.

“Tell him I'll be there shortly.”

“I understand, y-young master.”

I paid no mind to her quivering presence, my gaze fixed on my reflection.

And this is exactly why I despise this character, Yes, He is a villain with my name but does it matter, no, the problem is this guy's weight he is so heavy that this tub of lard is weighing me down, literally.

For someone who prides themselves on muscle, nothing's worse than “fat,” and this guy before me? Well, he's a prime example of that.

“I suppose I need a workout.”

Reaching the door, exhaustion gripped me and I found myself gasping for breath. It was unbelievable – this body was so darn heavy.

After an arduous struggle, I finally made my way out of the room, causing servants carrying a litter¹ to scurry over. They lowered it, creating a path for me to step onto it.

I tried to ignore the spectacle – it was this pampering that turned this fatty into a giant tire. Pushing the annoyance aside, I began to move, managing only about 10 steps before my legs gave out.

Damn it. Seriously? I collapsed, leaving the twenty servants to hastily lift me and place me onto the litter. For me, it felt more like a stretcher. There I was, sprawled on it like some mountain, panting heavily.

“You damn god! I hope the protagonist of your favorite novel gets NTRed!”

“We're here, young master.”

Can you believe it? his father's office is just thirty steps away from this pumpkin room, yet he insists on using a litter.

“Give me a hand.”

I ordered while cursing this hefty body under my breath.

“Oh, come, come, my dear child. How was your day?”

I glanced at the middle-aged man, his face exuding warmth and care.

As for my feelings? This old man right here is the reason this chubby exists. Not that I give a darn about my indulgent father.

“I'm alright, Dad.”

Yes, imagine this: as a noble, this old man spoiled this pumpkin so much that he thinks he can go around scolding the mansion's maids and servants.

“Take a seat. Hey, fetch his chair!”

You might wonder why he doesn't sit on a regular chair. Well, that's because the chair is custom-made to accommodate this hippo-sized frame.

“What's going on, Dad?”

Seriously, why would he summon this big old hippo over to his quarters? There's gotta be a reason for it....

“Your fiancee is coming tomorrow”

……………………………………………………………

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“I’m very sorry, but we are unable to cure you.”

“W-wait! Even AIDS can be cured now, how come nymphomania can’t?”

“Ha… haha…”

There was no other choice, Dan Ziwei could only return to his old job of being a quiet, peaceful gamer. Though, the games nowadays were a bit… strange…

Scenario 1: You like to shake hands with strangers.
Scenario 2: You like to hug friends.
Scenario 3: You’re a bottom.
Scenario 4: You’re a bottom.
Scenario 5: Important things should be said twice.

Dan Ziwei: … How am I meant to play a game like this?! (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻

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Unable to control his mouth, Lin Jian Yin scared away eight previous girlfriends and six previous managers thanks to his poisonous words. Finally unable to stand it, he goes to a strange antique shop recommended by his friend. The shop supposedly has something that can help him.

Even though a Nintendo that plays cartridges is a bit outdated, and probably no one plays it anymore, isn’t it too exaggerated to place it in an antique shop to sell?

After returning home with a Nintendo, Lin Jian Yin inserts the cartridge that the owner sold to him at a huge discount. Only then does he discover that this is actually a simulation game. The female protagonist isn’t a cute loli, nor is she a mature woman. Rather, with her old lady hair and blue-white slippers, she is such a frightening woman that calling her a Taiwanese babe would seriously be insulting Taiwanese babes.

Gods! His mission is actually to help this woman marry a perfect prince! How is that possible!!!

Wait, as the main guy protagonist, Lin Jian Yin actually isn’t the prince. Then, then, who exactly is he… No, “what” exactly is he?