PREVIEW

... I’m the villain.

Let’s be brutally honest for once: I had become so disgustingly fluent in the language of instant claiming that "real dating" now sounded like something anthropologists study in crumbling villages—like courtship rituals involving carved wooden dildos and three months of goat-herding before you’re allowed to touch a boob.

Archaic. Adorable. Irrelevant.

Normal people date. ...

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