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... ecome the unwavering guardians of our heritage, the unyielding defenders of our realm. Together, we would face the darkness that sought to consume our world, and with the strength of our shared purpose, we would kindle a new flame of hope in the midst of our despair.

In the aftermath of the devastating loss of the World Tree, the remaining elven citizens looked to me, the elven woman guard who had witnessed the tragedy firsthand, for guidance and leadership. Though the darkness had taken ...

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“If he’s being badass, I’m gonna plant my own crops. If he messes with me, he will not live past next year.”

Homebody Zhao Hai brought ‘QQ Farm’ along in his traversal to another world and resided within the body of a fallen noble. His fief was a black land which nothing could be planted, and more importantly, he even had a peerlessly powerful fiancee, who was actually the successor of a duchy and future Grand Duchess!

Even more importantly, he is a magical and martial cripple who could not learn magic and martial arts. His crippling was very thorough.

“I can’t learn magic, but I have the farm. You dare attack me? I’ll release bugs to eat up your rations and crops, and put pesticides and weed agents into your water sources to make your lands grow weeds. See if you dare to attack me. What? You wanna hire killers to assassinate me? Hehehe. I’ll hide inside the little house in my farm and see how you can attack me. When you leave, I’m gonna terminate your country’s crop productions, and then all of your people will revolt. See if you dare to kill me.”

Watch how this somewhat black hearted hobo uses his QQ Farm in the world of swords and magic to become a globally known nightmarish existence.

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My end was not majestic, my beginning was not beautiful, but I will make damn sure that I rise once more. No more shall I bend a knee, no more shall I hide, no more shall I cower. No more shall the light guild my path, for only Darkness remains.

***

Killed by the universe's greatest killer, Truck-Kun. My existence was twisted as I gazed up at King-Yama, staring down at me with revulsion, “You sick bastard, you ate people.” He bellowed, glaring at me with disgust.

Snorting, I gathered my courage raising my head high and proud, my voice carrying a hint of pride, “So what, have you ever tried it...Let me ask you, have you ever had sex.”

A bewildered expression hung on his rugged appearance as he absentmindedly nodded. A slight smirk crossed my face as I declared, “then have you ate ass,”

“WHAT!!!” He balled in panic, shivering like a guilty man on trial.

“HAHA, you call me disgusting, but it appears you were sucking ass, now that is truly disgusting. I don't judge, but if you ask me, I will stick to cannibalism.”

“THAT NOT A FAIR COMPARISON, YOU LITTLE SHIT,”

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