Mu Yuze’s expression froze and he immediately fixed his gaze somewhere beside He Juan’s head – anywhere but his eyes. And that was all He Juan needed to know the answer.

"Silly boy," He Juan let out a helpless sigh and flicked the boy’s forehead gently. "Why are you so foolish?"

"You...!" Mu Yuze’s eyes flicked to him for a split second before he looked away again. The rims of his eyes reddened and his face crumpled in extreme agitation. But in He Juan’s eyes, it seemed like the boy was seconds away from bursting into tears. He fumbled over his words, "You just... collapsed in the middle of the street because... because you were chasing after me! And I–I didn’t know..."

He Juan let out a soft ’oh’, his gaze softening even more. He plucked the glass from Mu Yuze’s hands and clasped his broad palms over the boy’s smaller ones, causing Mu Yuze to choke on his breath. "I’m so sorry, Xiao Ze..." he squeezed the boy’s hands, wishing for nothing but to chase away the persistent coldness on his skin. "I have truly scared you back there, haven’t I?"

Mu Yuze had always put on a bold and fearless front that sometimes, He Juan forgot he was but a boy who grew up in an abusive family. Perhaps he had gotten used to being blamed for something that was not his fault, perhaps he had gotten used to being beaten up without any reason at all, simply because the other person needed somewhere – or someone – to vent. Whatever it was, it had evidently affected his inner mentality, causing him to wonder whether it was his fault everytime something terrible happened. Every single time, he would beat himself up over some matters that were clearly out of his control and thus, it resulted in his low self-esteem.

Sure, the boy was strong and tenacious, but he was also so terribly fragile. So lovely and... precious.

’Ah,’ He Juan caught himself thinking. ’I really want to protect him for a lifetime – no, at least... until he no longer needs me.’

"None of it is your fault." He Juan rubbed soothing motion over Mu Yuze’s skin with his thumb, his voice deep and reassuring. "Do you hear me, Mu Yuze? None of it is your fault. You are allowed to get angry, to cry, to scream, to laugh..." his lips curved higher when he saw Mu Yuze peer up at him hesitantly, just like a little wild rabbit that poked its head out of the burrow to survey its surroundings. "You are allowed to ’feel’... and I assure you, no one will get angry at you for doing it. Your emotions are valid. They are a part of you that you should express, rather than bottle it up inside."

"If I do something wrong, tell me. Get angry at me. Argue with me. You can even kick me to vent," he laughed softly when he recalled that amusing event.

"T–That was...!" Mu Yuze’s face instantly bloomed crimson, hackles raised.

"I know, I know," He Juan cooed softly to comfort him. "I understand, you were angry at me at that time. That’s what I mean, Xiao Ze. If you’re angry, show me. I’d rather you throw tantrums at me instead of running away, okay?"

Mu Yuze glared at him and gritted out, "...I will not throw tantrums at you!"

"Noted that!" He Juan threw his head back and let out a peal of hearty laughter. He desperately suppressed his laughter to say, "Where are we again? Ah, that’s right. It is not only limited to when you’re angry. If you need help with something, ask me. If you’re feeling happy, share it with me and I will gladly listen, even if you’re only gushing about how cute Kitty is. And lastly..." his voice softened considerably. "If you are sad and don’t want to be alone, just call me. We can sit together watching TV, eating ice cream, playing cards – whatever you want. Of course, I can also lend you my shoulder if you want to cry." He patted his own shoulder with an arc of his eyebrow as though asking ’how is it?’

Mu Yuze’s eyes followed the movement of He Juan’s hand and stayed on his shoulder for a while, before he raised his eyes back to He Juan’s face. He looked... mildly uncomfortable? Why? He Juan’s smile faltered when another possibility slipped into his mind.

What if Mu Yuze... did not want him around? He Juan wished to be there along with the boy’s emotional growth. He wished to be the fortress that would guard the boy in his future days to come. But what if... what if Mu Yuze did not want anything to have with He Juan?

And it was plausible, wasn’t it? After all, for him, He Juan must be an unfamiliar acquaintance at most...

He Juan opened his mouth, intending to ask Mu Yuze to forget it and He Juan would not take it to heart if he were to refuse, when he suddenly heard Mu Yuze ask in a barely audible voice, "...Why?"

Mu Yuze stared at him, his gaze heated and piercing. Yet at the same time, there was something extremely vulnerable within as if he was desperately searching for something in He Juan’s eyes. "Why are you so kind to me? What’s in it for you? Is it a mere whim? A charity case? Or have you always been like this to everyone?"

This was the first time He Juan had heard such a long barrage of questions coming from Mu Yuze’s mouth, and he couldn’t help but be taken aback. But as soon as he registered the questions, he instantly knitted his brows. "Is that what you have always been thinking? That you are..." his breath snagged in his throat. Just the mere thought of it was enough to send a bitter pang to his heart. "...a charity case? A mere whim?"

"Or else?" Mu Yuze gave an awkward shrug. He must have seen something in He Juan’s face that caused his voice to get smaller and smaller, unsure. "I... I am useless to you. Unless you want to... s-sell me someday..."

"Oh God, Mu Yuze..." He Juan rubbed his face and barked out an abrupt laugh, soft at first before getting louder and louder until the end, he choked when his chest throbbed in pain. 𝘧𝓇𝑒𝑒𝑤ℯ𝑏𝓃𝘰𝑣ℯ𝘭.𝘤ℴ𝘮

"Careful!" Mu Yuze hovered over him anxiously. "W–Why the hell do you keep laughing when you’re already like this!"

"I am laughing because you’re so foolish!" He Juan wheezed, breathless from the sheer incredulity and the searing pain on his chest. He leaned back on the couch and tried to regulate his breathing. And only when the wave of pain subsided that he turned to Mu Yuze again, his voice solemn.

"You know, Xiao Ze. In this world, there are people who will hurt you simply because they want to. And then, there are people who will be kind to you... also because they want to." He rubbed his chest and put on a wounded look. "Gege is hurt. I’ve told you this since day one, but it turns out you don’t believe me at all, huh?"

"I– I was just..." Mu Yuze was getting more and more flustered, at an utter loss of words.

"No problem!" He Juan chuckled and ruffled the boy’s hair, a bit harder this time until Mu Yuze could not endure it anymore and swatted his hand away with a sullen look on his face. "Perhaps, you have only met the first type of people all your life. But from now on..." he showed a wolfish grin. "Gege is going to show you that the second type of people exists. I am going to be kind, so kind to you that you don’t know what to do with it. So be prepared, okay?"